Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit



5975 tweets posted from Twitter Web Client
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Obviously the fucking apple fanboys WOULD say the Galaxy nexus is a piece of shit. Fuck those people: http://t.co/FcEfd4k Monday, November 28, 2011 5:28:04 PMTwitter Web Client
If Verizon doesn't open up pre-orders the Galaxy Nexus in the next 5 minutes, I'm going to go batshit crazy Monday, November 28, 2011 1:19:54 PMTwitter Web Client
Everyone always talks about #firstworldproblems. How about #thirdworldsuccesses? http://t.co/PWbznH8 Monday, November 28, 2011 1:29:06 AMTwitter Web Client
Can I get the Galaxy Nexus now? Sunday, November 27, 2011 11:41:54 PMTwitter Web Client
Althought I'm pretty sure I puked like 3 pounds of stomach contents, so yay for losing weight Sunday, November 27, 2011 6:43:07 AMTwitter Web Client
I'm going to have to blame the fact that I yacked all over the place on 3AM Taco Bell... Not alcohol.... #i'magrossfucker Sunday, November 27, 2011 6:42:07 AMTwitter Web Client
So the Galaxy Nexus might only be $200? I don't give a fuck if it's $300. I need one and I needed it yesterday! Saturday, November 26, 2011 2:46:10 AMTwitter Web Client
Christ once said "let he who is without sin cast the first stone..." And then he stoned a mother fucker to death. Saturday, November 26, 2011 2:05:49 AMTwitter Web Client
@maljnew piglets are NOT like puppies Friday, November 25, 2011 11:32:59 AMTwitter Web Client
My knees ares pretty banged up. Hmmmm Wednesday, November 23, 2011 10:48:27 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm a fucking dumbass. Just spent 15 minutes trying to figure out why I couldn't connect to my cloud server and it was PeerBlock. #fail Tuesday, November 22, 2011 10:24:23 PMTwitter Web Client
Stop begging, fuckers. The more people beg me for something the less I comply. (Unless it's some hot girl. Then she can have me. But shh) Tuesday, November 22, 2011 5:28:51 PMTwitter Web Client
These fuckers should release this soon: http://t.co/p90u7vX Tuesday, November 22, 2011 12:55:19 PMTwitter Web Client
Welp, so much for me winning this week's pool... Monday, November 21, 2011 10:47:17 PMTwitter Web Client
You fucking Chiefs. I need you to ruin the spread so I can win money. Obviously, you're going to lose, but keep it close for fuck's sake. Monday, November 21, 2011 10:06:12 PMTwitter Web Client
This guy's such a fucking badass that we need to elect him immediately: http://t.co/Msp6UHp Monday, November 21, 2011 9:20:57 PMTwitter Web Client
Twitter: Y u no load more tweets on the timeline? Monday, November 21, 2011 9:01:23 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm so fat. Monday, November 21, 2011 3:54:27 PMTwitter Web Client
I. WANT. A. GALAXY. NEXUS. (with or without the volume bug) Monday, November 21, 2011 3:35:04 PMTwitter Web Client
Galaxy Nexus is delayed until December now? Fuck my life. Saturday, November 19, 2011 3:04:05 PMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew I said Red Bull/Vodka. Not rubbing alcohol and Diet Sprite. For fuck's sake! Friday, November 18, 2011 6:12:20 PMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew Bring me me a vodka Red Bull, joker Friday, November 18, 2011 6:01:49 PMTwitter Web Client
@Colithika I'm jelly
In reply to @Colithika's tweet
 Friday, November 18, 2011 11:39:49 AMTwitter Web Client
The office coffee today is vile. *dumping it now* and I can usually drink shitty coffee Friday, November 18, 2011 11:23:11 AMTwitter Web Client
My eye hurts. the hell? Friday, November 18, 2011 5:44:19 AMTwitter Web Client
@SonicBlur23 yeah
In reply to @SonicBlur23's tweet
 Thursday, November 17, 2011 11:35:17 PMTwitter Web Client
they'll find me dead one day. it'll teach them a fuckin lesson and i won't be around to give a shit about it. Thursday, November 17, 2011 11:33:08 PMTwitter Web Client
QFT: http://t.co/8BR0rUv Thursday, November 17, 2011 10:21:12 AMTwitter Web Client
I want my fucking Galaxy Nexus and Verizon's being a dick and a half about its release date. Thursday, November 17, 2011 9:24:03 AMTwitter Web Client
Sorry. I couldn't hear you over the sound of how good I look Wednesday, November 16, 2011 4:28:51 PMTwitter Web Client
I sound like a gay right now Tuesday, November 15, 2011 9:26:05 PMTwitter Web Client
Mother fucking Verizon delaying this Galazy Nexus Tuesday, November 15, 2011 3:01:17 AMTwitter Web Client
Niraj: "Why is the turkey black?" Eric: "Hmm.. there's no connection string..." Tuesday, November 15, 2011 2:53:56 AMTwitter Web Client
This baby that's crying his ass off in France is driving me crazy over Skype.. STFU Tuesday, November 15, 2011 2:49:13 AMTwitter Web Client
Herman Cain is a real crazy fuck, but his 404 page is baller: http://t.co/lZVYyXU Tuesday, November 15, 2011 2:41:59 AMTwitter Web Client
yayyy! I get to stay up all night for work Tuesday, November 15, 2011 12:10:41 AMTwitter Web Client
Christmas music and QA testing. Sounds about right... Monday, November 14, 2011 6:47:33 PMTwitter Web Client
To the gentleman with the 70s muscle car: Shut the fuck up with the engine revving and GTFO Monday, November 14, 2011 3:03:09 PMTwitter Web Client
"We need more pipes in this application. If it were up to me, I'd put pipes everywhere" Monday, November 14, 2011 11:47:59 AMTwitter Web Client
I suck at exception handling in php Saturday, November 12, 2011 1:33:00 AMTwitter Web Client
son of a bitch Saturday, November 12, 2011 12:54:03 AMTwitter Web Client
@mich_amore Don't mean to bust your bubble but in theory 11:11 PM is the 23rd hour... It's 23:11... 11:11 is AM. So you missed it.
In reply to @mich_amore's tweet
 Saturday, November 12, 2011 12:34:23 AMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu Yup. They gave me 30 days. I couldn't find a smartphone in that time, so I lost out. Fuckin Galaxy Nexus should have been out...
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Friday, November 11, 2011 1:33:40 PMTwitter Web Client
"Expected behavior: UI should not be disturbed" Friday, November 11, 2011 12:20:43 PMTwitter Web Client
These bitch ass tricks didn't replace the milk Friday, November 11, 2011 12:12:48 PMTwitter Web Client
Fuck you Verizon, for un-grandfathering me from my unlimited data plan. Friday, November 11, 2011 10:52:32 AMTwitter Web Client
gangster Friday, November 11, 2011 9:48:04 AMTwitter Web Client
I'll stop the geek assed tweets. I sound like I have ZERO life... Thursday, November 10, 2011 10:24:19 PMTwitter Web Client
Another test tweet, my jokers Thursday, November 10, 2011 10:18:37 PMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu also: "sudo get bitches"
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Thursday, November 10, 2011 10:03:25 PMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu nah, i was being dumb. its easy "sudo apt-get install php5-curl" needed it bc my webapp called the func it but it wasn't installed
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Thursday, November 10, 2011 10:02:09 PMTwitter Web Client
Now if I tweet something, wp-cron needs to pull it into my tweets database. if that works, i'm migrating servers Thursday, November 10, 2011 9:36:38 PMTwitter Web Client
Son of a bitch. How do I get CURL working on php-cgi for lighttpd Thursday, November 10, 2011 9:30:44 PMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu 600gigs of bandwidth, abusers. you can do a lot of stuff on there.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Thursday, November 10, 2011 4:50:01 PMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu They only support linux, but it's your server, so if you can hack windows on virtualbox on there, go for it.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Thursday, November 10, 2011 4:45:26 PMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu 10.10 may be newer but 10.04 LTS stands for long term support, so I picked that one
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Thursday, November 10, 2011 4:37:06 PMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu ubuntu. follow these:http://t.co/YjgzyrM OR http://t.co/tnMle0o Thursday, November 10, 2011 4:35:07 PMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu Yo abusers. Check out chunkhost. 5 month free trial and it's $19/month for a 512mb ram cloud instance. seems pretty sweet to me Thursday, November 10, 2011 4:26:34 PMTwitter Web Client
lighttpd > apache Thursday, November 10, 2011 2:58:29 PMTwitter Web Client
Hmm I thought I was going to be scared of lighttpd, but it's just as easy to config as apache. Thursday, November 10, 2011 4:40:21 AMTwitter Web Client
fuck man... why doesn't "sudo aptitude install lighttpd" work on Ubuntu 10.04 LTS? Wednesday, November 09, 2011 10:47:35 PMTwitter Web Client
Glad to know that I drunk spoke to my CA coworker on the phone and fixed her "unfixable" problem. Thx for the shoutout to the VP. I suck lol Wednesday, November 09, 2011 9:50:39 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm a fucking dick... I rip on people a lot. If you don't like it, fuck off. I do it with good intent. Wednesday, November 09, 2011 5:30:28 PMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew Your mouse wheel is tight Wednesday, November 09, 2011 11:55:55 AMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu I heard ChunkHost is baller. I'm so tempted to get it
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Wednesday, November 09, 2011 11:38:10 AMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu Abusers, what VPS do you use? Wednesday, November 09, 2011 10:30:43 AMTwitter Web Client
I can't deal with the fucking dumbasses over at @FairfieldMirror or @mirrorfairfield or whatever the fuck twitter they use now. Site is done Wednesday, November 09, 2011 12:20:59 AMTwitter Web Client
When is this fucking Galaxy Nexus coming out. I am losing my mind without a smartphone. Tuesday, November 08, 2011 10:06:07 PMTwitter Web Client
I should probably put some some clothes on or some shit Tuesday, November 08, 2011 9:54:11 PMTwitter Web Client
Balls all over the office Tuesday, November 08, 2011 4:08:48 PMTwitter Web Client
Just drooled water onto my shirt #suchababy Tuesday, November 08, 2011 12:40:59 PMTwitter Web Client
File a ticket: "Load Balancer Being a Player Hater" Tuesday, November 08, 2011 11:14:04 AMTwitter Web Client
I just realized that it's hard for code to get by my rigorous QA. I'm a nit-picking pain in the ass. Devs hate me. I love perfection. Tuesday, November 08, 2011 1:10:47 AMTwitter Web Client
I need the Eagles to not cover the spread. I also need the game to be around 37 points for me to win the week #notgonnahappen =/ Monday, November 07, 2011 7:01:32 PMTwitter Web Client
@mich_amore @SonicBlur23 @lisa_marie926 What's this bullshit you all get to play all day long. I'm sitting at work and feel like shit
In reply to @mich_amore's tweet
 Monday, November 07, 2011 2:06:24 PMTwitter Web Client
The pressure in my head... It like... Might blow off or something. Monday, November 07, 2011 1:51:28 PMTwitter Web Client
Intern is using the new gmail look. I'm not a fan of that crap, but I'm impressed she knew enough to manually enable it. Monday, November 07, 2011 11:45:54 AMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew What happened to: I'm going to be in at 10AM on Monday, joker
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
 Monday, November 07, 2011 10:26:47 AMTwitter Web Client
@kerbear88 I thought that was you. Couldn't tell though.
In reply to @kerbear88's tweet
 Monday, November 07, 2011 10:16:47 AMTwitter Web Client
Yes, I just called a dude slutface. If you're judging, suck it. Sunday, November 06, 2011 1:47:46 AMTwitter Web Client
@Colithika Sluttttface. You don't get an extra hour because AZ is like F that side. Sunday, November 06, 2011 1:47:11 AMTwitter Web Client
I love gaining an extra hour for no reason. #daylightsavingstimeisoutdatedandonlyappliedtofarmersinthe1800s Sunday, November 06, 2011 1:46:22 AMTwitter Web Client
And they came crying to me because they fucked it up. #typical #Ifixeverything Thursday, November 03, 2011 7:06:15 PMTwitter Web Client
Remember how I said that I had to get used to the new Gmail user interface? Scratch that. It fucking sucks... Wednesday, November 02, 2011 9:39:24 PMTwitter Web Client
Cocksuckers over at Verizon keep delaying the Galaxy Nexus. I have to wait until Black Friday now? Or maybe December. Fuck the Razr. Wednesday, November 02, 2011 4:39:48 PMTwitter Web Client
Netta is going to give me SO much shit for my antics... Wednesday, November 02, 2011 1:59:27 PMTwitter Web Client
Peppers and eggs on a roll.. NOM Wednesday, November 02, 2011 1:57:11 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm trying to like the new Gmail UI, I really am, but I cannot get into it... Wednesday, November 02, 2011 12:05:55 PMTwitter Web Client
Just dropped a bomb at my desk... Wednesday, November 02, 2011 10:07:17 AMTwitter Web Client
Got my bag particle analyzed for bombs in Grand Central... The TSA guy was NOT pleased when I asked if would detect all the fireworks I had. Wednesday, November 02, 2011 9:47:35 AMTwitter Web Client
It's all fucked up... Tuesday, November 01, 2011 7:02:22 PMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew malik xab Tuesday, November 01, 2011 6:10:32 PMTwitter Web Client
@Waspito @Colithika No one's getting ice cream sandwich just yet. It's debuting on the Galaxy Nexus.
In reply to @Waspito's tweet
 Tuesday, November 01, 2011 4:57:39 PMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew Shitshow? Get you ass back to work joker. I remember the first time I got hammered at lunch.
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
 Monday, October 31, 2011 6:47:17 PMTwitter Web Client
This incompetent mother fucker needs to lose her job. Monday, October 31, 2011 2:32:06 PMTwitter Web Client
It's like Christmas morning! Except... It never usually snows on Christmas morning Saturday, October 29, 2011 1:42:16 PMTwitter Web Client
Here kitty kitty kitty!!!! Friday, October 28, 2011 2:32:12 PMTwitter Web Client
The lack of slut costumes in this office today are appalling Friday, October 28, 2011 12:27:46 PMTwitter Web Client
Slept so soundly on the train, pretty sure if the dude next to me drew a dick on my face, I wouldn't have woken up. Friday, October 28, 2011 9:52:58 AMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew HE didn't have an option. I showed up, drank and was like enjoyyyy the bill. Smell ya later
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
 Thursday, October 27, 2011 10:44:04 PMTwitter Web Client
Beer and JQuery FancyBox. Sounds legit. Thursday, October 27, 2011 5:38:00 PMTwitter Web Client
I need someone to dress up as Jasmine for Halloween. Then I need to bang said person. #missioncomplete Thursday, October 27, 2011 3:53:59 PMTwitter Web Client
DLK is a badass: "Those guys need to a we're not fucking dumbasses asterisk next to our account" Thursday, October 27, 2011 9:56:36 AMTwitter Web Client
How the fuck did my pants get wet? I didn't just piss myself, did I? Wednesday, October 26, 2011 3:00:12 PMTwitter Web Client
They need to finish this fuckin Popham Road bridge. Fuckin drilling, banging and machines all night, and I'm a half a mile away! Wednesday, October 26, 2011 1:47:33 AMTwitter Web Client
Bitch finally took my advice. I win! When I propose something at work, it will go my way, and it will be good. #futurestevejobs #winning Tuesday, October 25, 2011 10:17:56 PMTwitter Web Client
I swear to God, if this cunt coughs in my face one more fucking time... Tuesday, October 25, 2011 5:00:04 PMTwitter Web Client
After working in nano all day and moving to notepad++, I tried to save a file with Ctrl-O. Got confused when the open dialog came up. #fail Tuesday, October 25, 2011 4:11:31 PMTwitter Web Client
OMG. html5 Duck Hunt!!! http://t.co/HBweLwp Tuesday, October 25, 2011 11:54:46 AMTwitter Web Client
I want to punch Michelle in the face right now, on the grounds that her web design is fucking flawed, confusing and I'm right Tuesday, October 25, 2011 10:10:22 AMTwitter Web Client
@Waspito Funny how I left school and my alcoholism stopped (kind of). Living at home reminds me of the show Sober House with Dr. Drew.
In reply to @Waspito's tweet
 Tuesday, October 25, 2011 12:51:12 AMTwitter Web Client
@Waspito Fuck that shit. Have a beer or 6
In reply to @Waspito's tweet
 Tuesday, October 25, 2011 12:33:25 AMTwitter Web Client
So amazing when I was ripping on one of our new products and didn't realize the VP of Marketing was standing behind me. #winning Monday, October 24, 2011 10:19:32 PMTwitter Web Client
It kills me so hard that I can't tweet what I want anymore and have to keep this toned down. Monday, October 24, 2011 6:07:26 PMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew ooooooooo. Someone lurves the new guy!
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
 Monday, October 24, 2011 4:24:50 PMTwitter Web Client
This is going to be a fun commute... Monday, October 24, 2011 8:23:13 AMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu Literally got rained on
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Sunday, October 23, 2011 11:06:59 PMTwitter Web Client
if Verizon doesn't launch the Galaxy Nexus on the 10th, I swear. (I'm in NEED of a phone, folks. Like... I'm using a shitty enV) Saturday, October 22, 2011 6:30:49 PMTwitter Web Client
@scoopANDslam I almost went to White Plains tonight... Almost
In reply to @scoopANDslam's tweet
 Saturday, October 22, 2011 3:08:42 AMTwitter Web Client
I do NOT see eye to eye with the Director of Visual Design... Obviously JQuery fade is better than an archaic javascript modal. Jesus Christ Friday, October 21, 2011 5:39:38 PMTwitter Web Client
Such a geek @__JLu explode(" ", $accounting); Friday, October 21, 2011 11:11:06 AMTwitter Web Client
@scoopANDslam This is what happens when you work in accounting. Every aspect of accounting fucking sucks. Tech startups for the win. Friday, October 21, 2011 10:34:42 AMTwitter Web Client
@BriBTC Quite possible. I didn't notice
In reply to @BriBTC's tweet
 Thursday, October 20, 2011 11:53:02 PMTwitter Web Client
@ky9 dimetapp was better before they removed the ingredient linked to causing strokes. Probs for the better, but it worked better before
In reply to @ky9's tweet
 Thursday, October 20, 2011 11:52:49 PMTwitter Web Client
This is going to annoy me all day long... Thursday, October 20, 2011 12:49:09 PMTwitter Web Client
My fucking SSH server won't connect. I think Verizon is blocking ports. Sheeeeit Thursday, October 20, 2011 12:43:22 PMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew Nettie is f'in legitimate
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
 Wednesday, October 19, 2011 6:25:00 PMTwitter Web Client
Winning attitude: stop giving a fuck about everything and then only good things will happen to you. Wednesday, October 19, 2011 5:10:59 PMTwitter Web Client
I would do very shameful things in exchange for activating a Galaxy Nexus on Verizon right now. Wednesday, October 19, 2011 1:03:36 AMTwitter Web Client
RT @Android: And we're live! Go to http://t.co/SxXf2tGG to tune in to our livestream for Android updates. Tuesday, October 18, 2011 10:02:29 PMTwitter Web Client
I'd just like to point out that configuring Ubuntu's iptables to allow passive FTP traffic through fucking blows Tuesday, October 18, 2011 2:07:43 AMTwitter Web Client
Is it necessary for the train going by to lay on the horn for like 1 minute straight at this hour? Fucking MTA Tuesday, October 18, 2011 1:43:40 AMTwitter Web Client
the sun decided to align itself with the fuckin crack in the shade right where my eyes are Monday, October 17, 2011 5:26:43 PMTwitter Web Client
RT @wastpito @portfolioso was [in a Twitter class] wearing a bald cap shooting a classmate with his banana gun. #intoxicateddreams Saturday, October 15, 2011 4:43:08 PMTwitter Web Client
Yes, nothing like the COO coming to my desk with Facebook on one monitor, Twitter on another and an empty beer bottle. #winning Friday, October 14, 2011 5:33:14 PMTwitter Web Client
AHAHAHAHAHA Friday, October 14, 2011 5:17:08 PMTwitter Web Client
RT @Android: Something delicious is coming: http://t.co/kIK5Ih2E Friday, October 14, 2011 2:56:22 PMTwitter Web Client
Welp, looks like the rainstorm killed my phone... Don't bother texting. Now I really need that Galaxy Nexus Friday, October 14, 2011 9:55:14 AMTwitter Web Client
@Novellabella sounds like an awesome time. Enjoy. I will be out drinking instead
In reply to @Novellabella's tweet
 Thursday, October 13, 2011 6:15:09 PMTwitter Web Client
I need a Galaxy Nexus. Immediately... Thursday, October 13, 2011 2:53:49 PMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu Hilton can suck it right now. I'm working with jokers on the other side of the world right now and I want to sleep
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Thursday, October 13, 2011 1:36:37 AMTwitter Web Client
And this is another fucking piece of shit phone that has to go, you frozen fuck. Thursday, October 13, 2011 1:26:28 AMTwitter Web Client
They don't pay me enough for this fucking shit. I expect to get free Hilton rooms whenever the fuck I want for my efforts. Thursday, October 13, 2011 1:25:36 AMTwitter Web Client
Dear Verizon. Stop capping fuckin YouTube traffic assholes. I have 25MBPS symmetrical internet and my YouTube videos load like f'in dialup Wednesday, October 12, 2011 9:26:01 PMTwitter Web Client
Fuckin A, Alexey. Can you fix the damn customer flow and mobile flow on stable. JEEZ Wednesday, October 12, 2011 5:46:49 PMTwitter Web Client
Ah that was short. Wednesday, October 12, 2011 5:12:12 PMTwitter Web Client
HAHA Blackberry fucking sucks. Get an iPhone or Android RT @__JLu talk about a #RIM job... Wednesday, October 12, 2011 2:33:00 PMTwitter Web Client
I'd forgotten how amazing The Foo's last album was Wednesday, October 12, 2011 2:31:52 PMTwitter Web Client
RT @VtotheFlo Internet dead on all Berries #blackberryfail. Android users laugh in our faces. yes, I mean you, @portfolioso Wednesday, October 12, 2011 10:53:14 AMTwitter Web Client
@mich_amore @Waspito @SonicBlur23 The cool kids use Google+ because it has lets up to 10 people video chat. Free Skype cannot do that.
In reply to @mich_amore's tweet
 Wednesday, October 12, 2011 1:11:38 AMTwitter Web Client
You CANNOT come to my desk, stretch your arms up, lean backwards and put your hair down and expect me to pay attention to your issue. Tuesday, October 11, 2011 5:58:39 PMTwitter Web Client
Stale cookies and an apple for lunch. Gross. Tuesday, October 11, 2011 4:06:24 PMTwitter Web Client
Niraj: "Why is this all slow and shit" Tuesday, October 11, 2011 2:15:23 AMTwitter Web Client
It's fucking bullshit that I need to be running my air conditioner on OCTOBER 10th. It should be cold outside. Tuesday, October 11, 2011 12:13:35 AMTwitter Web Client
Today I am going to eat like a pig, watch tv, play sports and enjoy life... Because I can. Saturday, October 08, 2011 12:53:34 AMTwitter Web Client
You've gotta be fucking kidding me. I need a new phone stat, and the Galaxy Nexus was delayed because Jobs kicked it? fuuuuuuck that side. Friday, October 07, 2011 1:24:22 PMTwitter Web Client
I feel so fat right now. Friday, October 07, 2011 12:56:18 PMTwitter Web Client
Alexey and his Russian accent just asked me if I had candies and I understood "do you have any Guinness" Alexey! It's like 10AM! Friday, October 07, 2011 11:24:59 AMTwitter Web Client
The front end developer from Portland, Oregon finally brought West Coast coffee and brewed it. NOM. The office coffee is finally legitimate. Friday, October 07, 2011 10:30:33 AMTwitter Web Client
And the Twitter machine is back up. Wonder what happened. Haven't see a fail whale in years. Friday, October 07, 2011 1:05:26 AMTwitter Web Client
I could file more bugs. Eh fuck it, lets just go to the bar Thursday, October 06, 2011 6:07:01 PMTwitter Web Client
Sheeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiit Thursday, October 06, 2011 4:47:51 PMTwitter Web Client
I file more bugs after a few beers than without beer. This is productive. Thursday, October 06, 2011 3:50:55 PMTwitter Web Client
I think I just wet myself: http://gizmodo.com/5847288/galaxy-nexus-the-first-ice-cream-sandwich-android-phone-has-a-killer-720p-screen Thursday, October 06, 2011 1:58:43 PMTwitter Web Client
Mother fucking Firefox Sync. Thanks for overwriting my bookmarks with old shit you bastards. Thursday, October 06, 2011 9:45:09 AMTwitter Web Client
@tomwcleary TC, what are you doing the night shift now?
In reply to @tomwcleary's tweet
 Thursday, October 06, 2011 12:15:56 AMTwitter Web Client
@Novellabella CDs? What is this, 1998?
In reply to @Novellabella's tweet
 Wednesday, October 05, 2011 6:24:23 PMTwitter Web Client
@Waspito accounting fucking blows. I feel bad for you bro
In reply to @Waspito's tweet
 Wednesday, October 05, 2011 6:20:35 PMTwitter Web Client
@nyJULZmd oil, real garlic and a pinch of adobo
In reply to @nyJULZmd's tweet
 Wednesday, October 05, 2011 2:22:16 PMTwitter Web Client
fucking parentheses... So dumb Wednesday, October 05, 2011 1:58:30 PMTwitter Web Client
why the FUCK won't my script work? Wednesday, October 05, 2011 1:47:45 PMTwitter Web Client
AHAHA. MY VP over here thinks the Brewers are going to beat the Phillies Wednesday, October 05, 2011 11:24:40 AMTwitter Web Client
@nyJULZmd Ain't that a bitch
In reply to @nyJULZmd's tweet
 Wednesday, October 05, 2011 10:59:31 AMTwitter Web Client
Great, I look like mother fuckin Rudolph right now. Tuesday, October 04, 2011 6:17:41 PMTwitter Web Client
Pretty sure I reactivated every single bug sent my way because they're all broken still. Christ. How are we supposed to release like this? Tuesday, October 04, 2011 2:02:13 PMTwitter Web Client
Dear every single tech blog on my news reader, Shut the fuck up about the iPhone 5. I don't give a shit and will be getting a Nexus Prime Tuesday, October 04, 2011 12:39:28 PMTwitter Web Client
D'oh! It needed to be %%a Tuesday, October 04, 2011 10:09:38 AMTwitter Web Client
Can anyone tell me why this works in the cmd line but not in a batch file? for /f "delims=" %a in ('find /V "" myfile.txt') do @set myvar=%a Tuesday, October 04, 2011 10:03:11 AMTwitter Web Client
It's always a good sign when the builds they give us pass my Selenium scripts instead of failing like 15 times along the way. Monday, October 03, 2011 6:38:20 PMTwitter Web Client
Not in the mood... Monday, October 03, 2011 9:49:42 AMTwitter Web Client
This is me every fucking day: http://t.co/CMcPVFv Monday, October 03, 2011 12:26:54 AMTwitter Web Client
Sometimes I look at things and I'm like... Enough of this shit. Sunday, October 02, 2011 7:38:20 PMTwitter Web Client
Puked in my mouth a little... Sunday, October 02, 2011 7:26:35 PMTwitter Web Client
Please explain to me how the new site worked 100% in my environment and then when I rolled it out, it's completely fucked in the head... Saturday, October 01, 2011 1:48:08 PMTwitter Web Client
@Novellabella I remember my first crush
In reply to @Novellabella's tweet
 Friday, September 30, 2011 4:59:24 PMTwitter Web Client
Someone bring that puppy back to the office Friday, September 30, 2011 4:26:01 PMTwitter Web Client
Sales girl: Y U put on more clothes? Friday, September 30, 2011 3:57:14 PMTwitter Web Client
I'd pounce on that Friday, September 30, 2011 3:30:57 PMTwitter Web Client
RT @MalJNew Look at this angel in my office! http://t.co/8KVkqhG Friday, September 30, 2011 12:03:04 PMTwitter Web Client
There's a beagle in our office and she's the cutest. I'm going to steal her. We should get a company dog Friday, September 30, 2011 11:38:28 AMTwitter Web Client
MTA finally got those useless ass countdown clocks working on the 4-5-6 line in Grand Central. Only took them like 4 years and $200 million Thursday, September 29, 2011 10:59:08 AMTwitter Web Client
Protip: Don't use Proctor in the playoffs Thursday, September 29, 2011 12:10:09 AMTwitter Web Client
I CALLED THE WALKOFF! Thursday, September 29, 2011 12:07:04 AMTwitter Web Client
@nyJULZmd I'm the meanest
In reply to @nyJULZmd's tweet
 Thursday, September 29, 2011 12:01:39 AMTwitter Web Client
Amateur hour: Never make the first or last out @ 3rd #iremembermyfirstlittleleaguegame Wednesday, September 28, 2011 11:55:17 PMTwitter Web Client
Golson runs like he has shit in his pants Wednesday, September 28, 2011 11:53:12 PMTwitter Web Client
scottproctorsarm.com Wednesday, September 28, 2011 11:44:02 PMTwitter Web Client
Michael Kay is seriously wondering how much Proctor can pitch? Fuckin like 12 innings straight, duh. Torre broke his arm in. Wednesday, September 28, 2011 11:36:57 PMTwitter Web Client
Joe Girardi is fucking dumbtarded if he uses Dave Robertson in this game. Who cares if we lose Wednesday, September 28, 2011 11:02:17 PMTwitter Web Client
So that netbook my coworker destroyed... The keys are sticky now. So I poured water into it. That will clean them, right? Wednesday, September 28, 2011 5:27:39 PMTwitter Web Client
Fuck the Mets & Jose Reyes. Lousy, slacker lowlife cheating organization. I hope Braun goes 5-5. Embarrassment to New York. Get the fuck out Wednesday, September 28, 2011 4:22:58 PMTwitter Web Client
Firefox blows at loading CSS3 webfonts Wednesday, September 28, 2011 4:19:35 PMTwitter Web Client
Acer netbooks take coffee to the keyboard really... really well... (This is what happens when coworkers sit on your desk and spill shit) Wednesday, September 28, 2011 3:05:38 PMTwitter Web Client
Pearl Jam and writing release notes at 1AM... Half awesome. Half... Could be worse. Tuesday, September 27, 2011 1:04:22 AMTwitter Web Client
I. JUST. LOST. It. Literally hysterical laughing for like 3 minutes: http://t.co/wDasWYL Tuesday, September 27, 2011 12:44:05 AMTwitter Web Client
mmm. The tomato made this sangwich Monday, September 26, 2011 1:40:09 PMTwitter Web Client
Welp, I've got jack shit to do for another 20 minutes while I wait for this build to finish compiling before I can test it's ass off. Monday, September 26, 2011 9:50:59 AMTwitter Web Client
I'm picking my football pool picks randomly next week. The more I analyze, the fewer I get right Monday, September 26, 2011 12:11:45 AMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu @michellemm22 You need a PhD in Facebookology for the timeline. I miss the simple days when every feature was on a separate php page
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Friday, September 23, 2011 3:32:04 PMTwitter Web Client
omg the Gmails is down Friday, September 23, 2011 2:28:26 PMTwitter Web Client
Network admin pushes Kapersky AV through domain policy. I uninstall and block said policy. #localadmin #winning #anti-anti-virus (AVs suck) Friday, September 23, 2011 10:36:39 AMTwitter Web Client
Actual IMs during work: "idk shit about megan so i'd one night stand that" Thursday, September 22, 2011 6:02:08 PMTwitter Web Client
IT people want to push Antivirus software to my computer. Absolutely not. I will have that shit uninstalled in 4 minutes flat. Thursday, September 22, 2011 3:26:49 PMTwitter Web Client
Brandon is a fuckin' G with CSS. Thanks for fixing that glitch bro. Wednesday, September 21, 2011 6:11:45 PMTwitter Web Client
It's now much easier to focus on QA and testing with a decent buzz than without one #ineeddrdrewandrehab Wednesday, September 21, 2011 4:04:46 PMTwitter Web Client
Failures at life: People who still list their MySpace under their website links on Facebook... Wednesday, September 21, 2011 10:17:05 AMTwitter Web Client
I am going to blame my miserable failure at Moon Cake (98/99 stars) on the fact the level 1-17 gets fucking 3 frames per second. Wednesday, September 21, 2011 2:11:08 AMTwitter Web Client
It also doesn't help that the Droid 1's feeble CPU sucks ballsack and lags at running Angry Birds seasons. Even overclocked,it blows. Wednesday, September 21, 2011 1:52:36 AMTwitter Web Client
@SumthinEclectic Come on, abusers. Command line that shit.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Wednesday, September 21, 2011 1:14:52 AMTwitter Web Client
Now that was a good apple Tuesday, September 20, 2011 1:03:19 PMTwitter Web Client
"And she even had a Winnie the Pooh umbrella. We must bang now" Tuesday, September 20, 2011 9:59:54 AMTwitter Web Client
It's 1AM. I want a fuckin cheese steak. Tuesday, September 20, 2011 12:59:09 AMTwitter Web Client
I'm such a fucking jackass. Wondered why I couldn't log into my SQL server... Thought it was a bad password. SQL service wasn't running... Saturday, September 17, 2011 9:30:51 PMTwitter Web Client
My twitter timeline is messed up. Why isn't everyone I follow showing up? Saturday, September 17, 2011 2:25:46 PMTwitter Web Client
Seriously... Why is every single car and house alarm going off. Who's the dick... Saturday, September 17, 2011 1:34:23 AMTwitter Web Client
fml Saturday, September 17, 2011 1:06:44 AMTwitter Web Client
Those mother fuckers. I bet they copied Apple where you don't quit but programs just stay running and become suspended. Fucking Apple. Friday, September 16, 2011 10:40:53 PMTwitter Web Client
Well that was interesting... How the fuck are you supposed to quit apps? Windows 8 is so radically different, I had no idea how to use it. Friday, September 16, 2011 10:40:16 PMTwitter Web Client
Booting Windows 8 Dev Preview in a virtual machine. The suspense is killing me Friday, September 16, 2011 10:09:56 PMTwitter Web Client
Good tunes, and testing our new UI. Sweet day. Friday, September 16, 2011 11:00:52 AMTwitter Web Client
I hacked the nasty office coffee this morning and it tastes amazing. Winning Friday, September 16, 2011 10:27:33 AMTwitter Web Client
Le sigh Thursday, September 15, 2011 3:22:01 AMTwitter Web Client
@GadsdenMarc @SumthinEclectic ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
In reply to @GadsdenMarc's tweet
 Thursday, September 15, 2011 1:58:14 AMTwitter Web Client
I've gotten into a bad habit of burping out loud and then saying "delicious" without even realizing it. Wednesday, September 14, 2011 5:28:37 PMTwitter Web Client
@askmeques Stop making fun of New York. We get hurricanes now.
In reply to @askmeques's tweet
 Wednesday, September 14, 2011 1:12:31 PMTwitter Web Client
It's cool to know that Windows 8 is generating as much buzz on the interwebs as Apple announcements usually do. Wednesday, September 14, 2011 1:42:59 AMTwitter Web Client
Peach I just took a bite out of was a fuckin ball of fuzz. Nasty Tuesday, September 13, 2011 3:06:08 PMTwitter Web Client
RT @ElBloombito: Hateros gonna hato! Tuesday, September 13, 2011 12:47:51 PMTwitter Web Client
The fuck is it with bitch ass UK clients trying to use mother fucking leading zeroes in Excel? It removes it, shitheads! And you blame us... Monday, September 12, 2011 10:23:48 PMTwitter Web Client
@nyJULZmd The fuck is a hand grenade?
In reply to @nyJULZmd's tweet
 Monday, September 12, 2011 2:24:38 PMTwitter Web Client
Fuck... Me... now I just want to do jagerbombs Monday, September 12, 2011 2:20:53 PMTwitter Web Client
Marketing girls just brought us Red Bull. Is it bad that I 100% associate it with Jager? Monday, September 12, 2011 2:18:05 PMTwitter Web Client
@SumthinEclectic HA... The typo that got copied and pasted. I'm lazy.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
 Monday, September 12, 2011 1:32:49 PMTwitter Web Client
Why is everything a fucking shitshow today? Why am I the only person qualified to fix EVERYTHING? Monday, September 12, 2011 11:00:15 AMTwitter Web Client
want =) Monday, September 12, 2011 2:06:49 AMTwitter Web Client
Night tweeple http://t.co/LQjytL6 Sunday, September 11, 2011 4:45:06 AMTwitter Web Client
you fucking sneak mother fucker Sunday, September 11, 2011 3:41:12 AMTwitter Web Client
Those beers in the work fridge look reallllll fuckin good right now Friday, September 09, 2011 11:00:45 AMTwitter Web Client
This is so damn true it's not even funny: http://t.co/k4KU88t Friday, September 09, 2011 2:31:12 AMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew http://t.co/cxX5ioY Friday, September 09, 2011 12:21:07 AMTwitter Web Client

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