@dannyrob88 it was auto correct you dick

In reply to @dannyrob88's tweet

Sunday, January 15, 2012 10:36:54 PM from Twitter for Android

I think my hairline is more receded than Morgan Friedman's

Sunday, January 15, 2012 10:07:31 PM from Twitter for Android

My aunt talking about Madonna: "Anyone who will put it in, she gets it in" "Does the guy on Hung really have a big thing?"

Sunday, January 15, 2012 09:45:13 PM from Twitter for Android

I was supposed to work from home tomorrow, but my VP is a Packers fan so I'm gonna go in just to break his balls. I'm buying him cheese, too

Sunday, January 15, 2012 08:08:54 PM from Twitter for Android

@maljnew Stage 1 certified trainwreck

Sunday, January 15, 2012 01:32:12 PM from Twitter for Android

Omar, I really don't give a fuck about your cats. You can shut up now...

Sunday, January 15, 2012 01:14:31 PM from Twitter for Android

Geminis trending on Twitter. Holler

Sunday, January 15, 2012 04:00:45 AM from Twitter Web Client

Who wants to schnug?

Saturday, January 14, 2012 05:17:10 PM from Twitter for Android

New blog post: Welp, Looks Like My Brain is Fucked http://bit.ly/wP7bwL

Saturday, January 14, 2012 03:02:50 AM from Portfolioso.com Blog

55 yr old dude absolutely killing it on the train tonight. Guy was hysterical. If my phone wasn't dead, I'd have gem youtube footage

Saturday, January 14, 2012 02:51:25 AM from Twitter Web Client

This train depresses me. Its full of fine pieces of ass I will never have

Saturday, January 14, 2012 01:52:09 AM from Twitter for Android

@Onethirdof3x5 @tomwcleary nah. They suck homeskillet. Maybe next year

In reply to @Onethirdof3x5's tweet

Saturday, January 14, 2012 12:57:24 AM from Twitter for Android

"I was trying out lots of prospects" aka... "I was banging lots of girls"

Saturday, January 14, 2012 12:56:34 AM from Twitter for Android

"Weed makes me very introspective. And i always want to fuck people" hhhhhhh

Saturday, January 14, 2012 12:13:26 AM from Twitter for Android

I'm at Rudy's Bar & Grill (627 9th Ave., Btw W 44th & 45th St., New York) w/ 4 others http://4sq.com/wqypRi

Friday, January 13, 2012 11:05:48 PM from foursquare