NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THE KEG IS KICKED. FUCK

Friday, April 27, 2012 05:14:16 PM from Twitter Web Client

This waitress is like... unreal. You don't even understand.

Friday, April 27, 2012 01:56:54 PM from Twitter for Android

Fuck all you hos. When there's a will, there's a way. Got that shit built and shipped off to India for testing.

Friday, April 27, 2012 02:52:29 AM from Twitter Web Client

I'm going to war with our mother fucking build system.

Friday, April 27, 2012 02:44:26 AM from Twitter Web Client

Get ready for the great firewall of the United States. No more freedom i up in this bitch http://t.co/j2cql1I

Friday, April 27, 2012 01:32:10 AM from Twitter Web Client

New blog post: If You Use a Dog Ball Thrower, You're a Pussy http://bit.ly/JE2luf

Friday, April 27, 2012 12:53:51 AM from Portfolioso.com Blog

well I take back my complaints, bc our app was the fastest tested and it was a cool web talk.

Thursday, April 26, 2012 11:09:22 PM from Twitter for Android

@Novellabella probably because you complain too much

In reply to @Novellabella's tweet

Thursday, April 26, 2012 06:23:23 PM from Twitter Web Client

about why our shit is slow. well maybe it's because we load like 95 versions of jquery shit

Thursday, April 26, 2012 06:22:50 PM from Twitter Web Client

This is all bullshit. I just want to go to the mother fuckin bar but I have to go to a meetup in the middle of nowhere, manhattan

Thursday, April 26, 2012 06:22:35 PM from Twitter Web Client

OK I admit it. Android is a complete piece of shit unless you have a stock OS

Thursday, April 26, 2012 02:32:32 PM from Twitter Web Client

Motherfuckers need to drop dead... not on the subway. Drop dead somewhere the fuck else so you don't delay thousands of people.

Thursday, April 26, 2012 09:32:20 AM from Twitter Web Client

The get the fuck off my team: Phil Hughes edition... fuckin guys going to shit quicker than Joba.

Thursday, April 26, 2012 12:50:49 AM from Twitter for Android

I swear this dude is my favorite. If I wasn't into women, I might have had to go gay.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012 08:49:02 PM from Twitter for Android

I can't take this meeting seriously on the grounds that I would hook up with everyone here. Don't tell HR, people who follow me on here....

Wednesday, April 25, 2012 05:09:28 PM from Twitter for Android