I almost walked straight into my boss because I was too busy looking the other way staring at the sales girl. #creeper #awkward

Thursday, May 17, 2012 09:39:15 AM from Twitter Web Client

The Yankees really suck this season, you guys. At least I can watch the Rangers

Wednesday, May 16, 2012 08:32:44 PM from Twitter Web Client

If ya didn't know you're bein' scammed, you're too fuckin' dumb to keep this job. If ya did know, you were in on it. Either way, you're out!

Wednesday, May 16, 2012 05:39:38 PM from Twitter Web Client

What? The land of the free? Whoever told you that is your enemy.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012 01:05:00 PM from Twitter Web Client

ABSOLUTE SMOKESTACK. bang bang

Wednesday, May 16, 2012 11:22:09 AM from Twitter Web Client

Bro, cut your nails. you're nasty

Wednesday, May 16, 2012 08:06:50 AM from Twitter for Android

New blog post: Dave Grohl Is a Motherfuckin BOSS http://bit.ly/KviOQE

Wednesday, May 16, 2012 02:06:04 AM from Portfolioso.com Blog

What's this bullshit my internet is out. Fios never goes out. Bunch of bullshit.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012 12:31:20 AM from Twitter for Android

@smstemp oops. Sorry.

In reply to @smstemp's tweet

Tuesday, May 15, 2012 10:17:05 PM from Twitter for Android

@VtotheFlo You're at a bar alone and watching the Mets. The fucks wrong with you? Why would you ever watch the Mets?

In reply to @VtotheFlo's tweet

Tuesday, May 15, 2012 07:47:28 PM from Twitter for Android

sluttface

Tuesday, May 15, 2012 12:03:27 PM from Twitter Web Client

My video card "broke" Got a brand new one. This is what you get for downgrading me, sir.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012 10:12:09 AM from Twitter Web Client

@Frankalankster No reason why @VtotheFlo should be blocked b/c she only tweets about Fairfield Girl Problems. My tweets would get me fired

In reply to @Frankalankster's tweet

Tuesday, May 15, 2012 09:25:44 AM from Twitter Web Client

It's scary that there are no #kellyomealiatweets during this game.. You there?

Monday, May 14, 2012 09:28:16 PM from Twitter Web Client

Wags is hit or miss. SPOT on today. Like super bangable

Monday, May 14, 2012 04:56:21 PM from Twitter Web Client