Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

18.76% of my tweets contain the word fuck in them.

Love doing SQL queries against my tweets. Out of 5733 I have archived, I said fuck 1243 times in 1076 tweets (including this one)

@kerbear88 Wait... you disagree with most of my tweets? Haaaaa

Trains running like ass this morning. Too crowded. Too many people. I suggest genocide... Of people who walk too slowly.

Fuck this hipster with hipster glasses and his entourage of hot girls

Ain't nothing wrong with a little sass for the COO. Especially when you've got em by the balls. Although I do want his swagger. So hot.

The COO just sent me a task to complete. I finished it last January. Sent it back w/ comment: "Come on, man. I did this like,,, last winter"

Figured out the secret to tricking people out of thinking you're drunk. Onions. They mask alcohol like a motherfucker. But you smell anyway

@Novellabella worse than fat: bad grammar. "Is going went" nice.

I mean.... this bitch looks like a man but with that dress I'd still bang her.

I've got these fuckers hey the balls and they know it. And they'll do whatever the fuck I say. Because I'm right. And the shit

This guys doing great. When a guys got that good of a deal, ya can't do anythin else but mad respect. Good for you bro. Then I drink more.

I love how Alison has a galaxy nexus

@tomwcleary what a waste