If you come up to my desk and say "config file" expect me to know what the fuck you're talking about

Friday, March 29, 2013 04:07:34 PM from Twitter Web Client

25 mins late, 10 minutes late from lunch. This is me caring

Friday, March 29, 2013 03:10:16 PM from Twitter Web Client

I'm always here before my boss. The one day I come in late, he's hear early on a call.

Friday, March 29, 2013 09:25:29 AM from Twitter Web Client

Lol my last like 5 tweets were like... let's be honest

Thursday, March 28, 2013 11:01:48 PM from Twitter for Android

Hiii people :-)

Thursday, March 28, 2013 11:00:38 PM from Twitter for Android

Xtina is my FAVORITE lesbian ever!

Thursday, March 28, 2013 09:38:20 PM from Twitter for Android

Just told my old boss I felt some sort of way

Thursday, March 28, 2013 09:36:58 PM from Twitter for Android

Khodaja likes box

Thursday, March 28, 2013 09:23:11 PM from Twitter for Android

Now she's all over Mal. I mean that doesn't mean she's a lezzie because all girls wanna make out with Mals duh

Thursday, March 28, 2013 09:12:07 PM from Twitter for Android

This 1950s cartoon that's on at the bar is absolutely killin it

Thursday, March 28, 2013 09:08:38 PM from Twitter for Android

Okay.... What are two bastards taking shits... I need to piss bastards

Thursday, March 28, 2013 09:01:54 PM from Twitter for Android

Khodaja might be a lesbian. Not that there's anything wrong with that. She's snuggin xtina so hard. I've seen it before.

Thursday, March 28, 2013 08:54:46 PM from Twitter for Android

Ever since I left college, my vagina forgot how to drink..... FML

Thursday, March 28, 2013 08:52:38 PM from Twitter for Android

Tell that motherfucker he sucks, then take your dick out.

Thursday, March 28, 2013 08:25:39 PM from Twitter for Android

This is a real frumpy motherfucker behind me. Accidentally stepped on her foot and she flipped out. eatadick.info

Thursday, March 28, 2013 07:50:57 PM from Twitter for Android