Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

I might have just accidentally pissed on my phone...

Nice to know that I smell like cigs and beer and my boss is directly next to me.

I guess this is why my lowest score on my reviewbwas on professionalism.... Although I still met expectations. #bitches

Realllll pumped that Tom Petty came on at the bar, you guys. You think I have time for another beer before I go back to work?

Me explaining bluntly to Meg Long why something is broken in our app. #booker #hood http://t.co/RY2JyPQtzo

I was going batshit as to why I had to <?php ?> instead of <? ?>

But why the fuck would php remotely think it's a good idea to ship short_open_tag set to Off by default on Windows?

Xtina just named Eric: Popcaps. Fuckin boss

My ass looks excellent today #demjeans

Added a third monitor on my desk connected to another computer for monitoring. Gonna get a tan now. #bitches

Hughlon: "Yo. This dude on the 4 train had his dick out on this lady's back and I was like what the fuck dude"

Our recruiter needs to put on a bra on on the grounds that no one wants to see her old assed saggy titties bouncing around in a t-shirt

But what the fuck is going on in this world. Can't we just be peaceful? Fucking chill. Jesus fucking Christ already

Really Windows 8??? I haven't seen a computer look up that badly since Windows 98

Gary Busey cracked me the f up on last Sunday's Apprentice