My FTP server legit doesn't give a fuck. It just returned: 200 Don't care http://t.co/nVFVvrAUzJ

Tuesday, April 30, 2013 04:02:04 PM from Twitter Web Client

Observation: That batshit CE girl must not be all hopped up on coke anymore because she's been reallllll low-keyed lately

Tuesday, April 30, 2013 03:08:35 PM from Twitter Web Client

I'm getting my interns confused... Because they are dudes and not relevant to my interests.

Tuesday, April 30, 2013 02:55:44 PM from Twitter Web Client

I'm a metrotextual: http://t.co/cEeSaOUQVi

Tuesday, April 30, 2013 02:42:07 PM from Twitter Web Client

But is this not the ugliest fucking building in the history of buildings? Fuckin scrap of peeling steel beams http://t.co/Yf1YVibVt2

Tuesday, April 30, 2013 01:29:29 PM from Twitter for Android

Gonna add full text search to my twitter app instead of a %like% match. I was sick of assist coming up when I searched for ass

Tuesday, April 30, 2013 12:40:28 PM from Twitter Web Client

Looking forward to #eltres

Tuesday, April 30, 2013 11:21:37 AM from Twitter for Android

This fuckin train takes takes too long. I'm moving to the city. Fuck this noise.

Monday, April 29, 2013 11:45:09 PM from Twitter for Android

Derick, Syskill, JP and Joe Stein are fuckin killing me right now.

Monday, April 29, 2013 09:57:53 PM from Twitter for Android

I would bang the Philly Cheese Steaks here at Woody's

Monday, April 29, 2013 08:37:02 PM from Twitter for Android

Gotta love the geeky flyers in the shitter at Google... http://t.co/oxGhaGrLsg

Monday, April 29, 2013 07:14:49 PM from Twitter for Android

...and that was a weekend. Jesus

Monday, April 29, 2013 09:45:26 AM from Twitter Web Client

Frankie: "Dan. You either take a picture with Joe or I floss your teeth"

Sunday, April 28, 2013 07:58:45 PM from Twitter for Android

Fuck. We're alcoholics. No wonder I yacked http://t.co/cyserGbQ7T

Saturday, April 27, 2013 11:40:01 PM from Twitter for Android

Like your style, girl: "Oh no. No kids. Unless I pick one out and he's flawless"

Saturday, April 27, 2013 03:59:20 PM from Twitter for Android