Tom Petty is my jam. #sundayfunday

Sunday, June 09, 2013 01:06:56 PM from Twitter for Android

I just whacked myself in the dick with a belt

Sunday, June 09, 2013 01:04:48 AM from Twitter for Android

Don't fuck with my people. I'll come after you

Saturday, June 08, 2013 08:39:06 PM from Twitter for Android

I mean. When Lightning Crashes comes on at the bar, I'm getting hammered. @tomwcleary

Saturday, June 08, 2013 08:29:32 PM from Twitter for Android

RT @KFCBarstool: Meet the Mets, Meet the Mets, step right up and waste 8 hours of your day losing to the worst team imaginable.

Saturday, June 08, 2013 07:51:07 PM from Twitter for Android

Gonna put @KFCBarstool on suicide watch over this 20 inning mets loss. Typical mets...

Saturday, June 08, 2013 07:50:47 PM from Twitter for Android

I can do the Robert Plant falsetto like a boss. Get at me bitches

Saturday, June 08, 2013 06:02:56 PM from Twitter for Android

I possibly smell just as bad as Swati or Khodaja right now....

Saturday, June 08, 2013 06:01:12 PM from Twitter for Android

Joe Stein lives!

Friday, June 07, 2013 12:32:09 PM from Twitter Web Client

AMBER ALERT. WHERE IN NYC IS JOE STEIN? Gonna have to go on a manhunt

Friday, June 07, 2013 12:19:02 PM from Twitter Web Client

Not sure how I feel about becoming the Foursquare Mayor of Burger King

Friday, June 07, 2013 09:49:52 AM from Twitter Web Client

Just got a skype from @MalJNew: http://t.co/1hUq1j8yZs

Friday, June 07, 2013 09:12:55 AM from Twitter Web Client

Wasted right now. Couldn't figure out how to get off the escalator

Friday, June 07, 2013 08:57:19 AM from Twitter for Android

I think I'm still drunk

Friday, June 07, 2013 08:10:24 AM from Twitter for Android

Big screen TVs, blunts, and bitches

Thursday, June 06, 2013 09:43:50 PM from Twitter for Android