@kfcbarstool quote: "You can take that phone and and check my dick in on 4 Square for all I care. I’m the mayor of that pussy girl!"
Our building really needs to turn off this fucking Windows 3.1 dinging fire alarm
@Waspito feel better. That's the worst. You wake up and its fine, then it sucks. My Dr didn't give me any good shit either
Wednesday, July 24, 2013 08:44:36 PM from Twitter for Android
Lower Manhattan is a fuckin shithole
Wednesday, July 24, 2013 03:32:11 PM from Twitter for Android
Ran into a Bynes doppelganger. Head half shaved and all
Wednesday, July 24, 2013 03:28:10 PM from Twitter for Android
#RoyalBaby is so fucking insignificant it's not even funny. It's one human out of 8 billion. Get over yourselves
Wednesday, July 24, 2013 02:38:26 PM from Twitter Web Client
Just rebooted a production server and in the server log asking why I did the reboot, I wrote "VPN was being a dick"
Wednesday, July 24, 2013 02:26:28 PM from Twitter Web Client
May I ask what the fuck is the purpose of a living, immobile, hermaphroditic rock? And why would Chileans eat it? http://t.co/ukCW1Q72pu
Wednesday, July 24, 2013 01:07:05 AM from Twitter Web Client
Carlos Danger for Mayor!
This bed feels like it's deflating, and I'm not even on an air mattress. Heh???
Caption contest: "Sabato?" http://t.co/TsAm2MSNUL
SKYPE NEEDS AN INSTANT UNSEND HOTKEY on the grounds that I just IMed our new Dir. of Engineering "I was so pissed at our bathrooms today"
These work shitters are worse than grand central, traffic-wise. #everonegoaway
Just wrote a script to crash our system rapidly to test our error logging and alerting. Testing against production....
I'd bang a Moto X
Saturday, July 20, 2013 06:28:49 PM from Twitter for Android