I was born to run

Friday, July 05, 2013 01:01:24 AM from Twitter for Android

Dude. I just pissed out a fire. It was fuckin awesome. 'Murrrrrica

Thursday, July 04, 2013 11:54:05 PM from Twitter for Android

Bella's wasted http://t.co/fVrpRJQlzj

Wednesday, July 03, 2013 11:56:27 PM from Instagram

"Jesus might be on Conan tonight you guys" -@MalJNew

Wednesday, July 03, 2013 11:28:19 PM from Twitter for Android

@kerbear88 this is the best tweet I've ever read in my life

In reply to @kerbear88's tweet

Wednesday, July 03, 2013 11:24:20 PM from Twitter for Android

@SonicBlur23 you're a dick

In reply to @SonicBlur23's tweet

Wednesday, July 03, 2013 11:20:09 PM from Twitter for Android

Memphis fuck house? Kansas blue balls?

Wednesday, July 03, 2013 10:49:19 PM from Twitter for Android

Protip: Do not scream "I love bush" in the car with your GFs mom. I meant the 90s band!!!!!!

Wednesday, July 03, 2013 09:20:53 PM from Twitter for Android

Sassy is my daughter, obviously. http://t.co/AVp31muG0w

Wednesday, July 03, 2013 09:15:51 PM from Instagram

This chick on Hardcore Pawn is 100% in need of a cunt punt. Nothing more, nothing less

Wednesday, July 03, 2013 12:44:03 AM from Twitter for Android

Twitter poll: What is deadlier? Bridgeport, CT or a pawn shop in Detroit?

Wednesday, July 03, 2013 12:42:34 AM from Twitter for Android

Bob Loblaw lobs law bomb

Monday, July 01, 2013 12:37:09 PM from Twitter for Android

@mich_amore It's fine. I got a tick bite once. As long as it doesn't turn into a rash you'll be 100% fine

In reply to @mich_amore's tweet

Monday, July 01, 2013 12:32:38 AM from Twitter for Android

"Its better to ask for forgiveness than permission"

Sunday, June 30, 2013 10:54:50 PM from Twitter for Android

"He's a man. and he has glasses. and he looks like me, but he's much shorter. But he has one kidney and I have two. You know him?"

Sunday, June 30, 2013 10:48:24 PM from Twitter for Android