I'm puzzled as to why the Catholic Church decided to hold World Youth Day in Rio. Isn't the point of Rio to tap wild assed Brazilian sluts?
my phone just autocorrected sexter to Dexter
Probably Booker employees RT @uberfacts People are more likely to commit suicide on Monday than any other day of the week.
Words cannot even describe how much of a foul mood I've switched to the second I walked on the train to get to this fucking shithole
Someone please kill Joe Steins cats he has at home. I'm allergic as fuck to his clothing.
6 trains are actually pulling into the stations faster than this slow assed 4 I'm on. #nevergettingtowork
RT @KFCBarstool: Cuncel da career for Alex Rodriguez.
Lisa: its like a strap on thing you can pee with
2013 Yankees are cuncelled
Danny: "Oh! I could win in a projectile vomit contest"
Saturday, July 27, 2013 11:56:47 PM from Twitter for Android
Its 10 am. I'm wasted. Don't think I'd be able to operate a vehicle. Fuckin Haas party
Saturday, July 27, 2013 10:08:16 AM from Twitter for Android
Would you believe me if I said sir. Come down and put the charge on me. I wouldn't do that.
Saturday, July 27, 2013 02:46:50 AM from Twitter for Android
If I don't put @MalJNew on a leash she might uh... Let's be honest... And I'll allow it.
Saturday, July 27, 2013 01:30:37 AM from Twitter for Android
Mal is obsessiled over Dominican girls' asses so I mean....Threesome?
My Twitter is best Twitter