Time Warner Cable chokes on the tiniest cock possible. A fuckin cup and string can provide better internet service

Friday, August 30, 2013 11:15:35 PM from Twitter Web Client

Mad question askin, blunt passin...

Friday, August 30, 2013 08:50:04 PM from Twitter for Android

C notes by the layers, true fuckin players

Friday, August 30, 2013 08:48:15 PM from Twitter for Android

My superiors need to stop giving me titty twisters at the bar, especially when I'm on call.

Friday, August 30, 2013 08:46:49 PM from Twitter for Android

Labor day weekend ruined by an understaffed, shittily coded piece of shit crashy system that I have to watch.

Friday, August 30, 2013 05:02:45 PM from Twitter Web Client

Gave up on the cheeseburger idea for a falafel cart. Then gave up on that and got papa johns instead. Hhhhb

Thursday, August 29, 2013 11:09:07 PM from Twitter for Android

I need a cheeseburger

Thursday, August 29, 2013 10:26:00 PM from txt

I mean... My photobomb > Ryanes tits

Thursday, August 29, 2013 09:59:34 PM from txt

I'm very offended that I did the best photobomb of all time and Freddy didn't even take a group pic. He took ryannes fits instead

Thursday, August 29, 2013 09:59:09 PM from txt

Stones to led zep? Im gettin hammered. And I want a fuckin cheeseburger

Thursday, August 29, 2013 09:38:11 PM from txt

I'm gonna lay down a sick drum track to the stones and Dave Grohl is gonna teach me

Thursday, August 29, 2013 09:32:26 PM from txt

There's a lot of boogers up in that bitch

Thursday, August 29, 2013 09:23:06 PM from txt

What dumb bastard thought it was good to make a Bronx brewery? Beers, like the entire boro, suck ballsssssss

Thursday, August 29, 2013 09:22:05 PM from txt

PS I'm at a bar with no signal but sexts go through, so I'm tweeting via text message again

Thursday, August 29, 2013 09:01:28 PM from txt

I'm gonna need a cheeseburger

Thursday, August 29, 2013 09:00:42 PM from txt