@KFCBarstool one time I accidentally stole Drinkwater's seat and I was scared for my life
Saturday, October 26, 2013 08:51:47 PM from Twitter for Android
This pizza smells like the underside of a dick
Saturday, October 26, 2013 07:53:43 PM from Twitter for Android
I'm kind of awesome
Saturday, October 26, 2013 10:44:38 AM from Twitter Web Client
Vote for this shit you politician assed cunts: http://t.co/nAjRSeM94d Or else my commute starts to rape me in 2014
Thursday, October 24, 2013 03:29:05 PM from Twitter Web Client
@MalJNew sorry I got mad at your can opener. Hhhhhh
Wednesday, October 23, 2013 10:25:51 PM from Twitter for Android
New blog post: The Fact that Some Local News Station Says that Connecticut has Great Pizza is Fucking Blasphemy http://t.co/sGZaTFzvRT
Wednesday, October 23, 2013 11:13:30 AM from Portfolioso.com Blog
First line: "Connecticut is known for great pizza" FOR SURE NOT. CT Pizza is ass http://t.co/WEyBwvsuek
Wednesday, October 23, 2013 09:23:05 AM from Twitter Web Client
When half the sales team and VPs are in Vegas getting hammered and selling our shit, and I'm here listening to this suit.... Eat a dick.
Tuesday, October 22, 2013 11:03:34 AM from Twitter for Android
"I've only been doing releases for two years, John. I've only gotten good them since you started" #eatadick
Tuesday, October 22, 2013 10:44:46 AM from Twitter for Android
Things I don't need on a Tuesday morning: TK's saggy assed floppy bra-less titties #VOM
Tuesday, October 22, 2013 10:16:26 AM from Twitter Web Client
I WILL unfollow you on Instagram if every single picture you post is a fucking BitStrips comic
Monday, October 21, 2013 09:38:18 AM from Twitter Web Client
My boy Barry on Metro North made my day again. They told him to stop telling people "no wiggling" but he did it anyway. #badass
Monday, October 21, 2013 09:11:58 AM from Twitter Web Client
I may have just pooped a cobra
Sunday, October 20, 2013 03:56:17 PM from Twitter for Android
Legit almost just inhaled a yellow jacket. It was on my lips.
Sunday, October 20, 2013 10:20:49 AM from Twitter for Android
Dawg looks comfy http://t.co/lcbo7uYNMk