Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

Ran into @JenSelter's ass doppelganger on the subway. The struggle was real to look away with @MalJNew next to me.

This cocksucker needs to stop asking me if I finished my scripts yet. Asking me 10 times per minute doesn't make me work faster.

I honestly believe Antivirus software was invented for IT job security. It fucks up computers so badly, that they always need to fix shit.

Fuckin pissed that I'm listening to McGivern babble instead of getting drunk at @SaloonNYC and watching the Olympics with @KFCBarstool

The GF got me a massage. Booked me with a dude. Man hands. Reminds me of Johnny Drama....

Any time I right click a Chrome tab and duplicate it, I think of Joe Stein. You'd think this is a dumb feature, but it's mad useful.

I don't want this fucking antivirus on my work computer. 1000 problems since it was installed. Fuck this corporate assed "startup"

I do not like authority

Someone around here smells like fucking dog food

Verizon just sent over a Consuela to work on our fiber. Woman looks like a cleaning attendant, not a fiber installer/ tech.

Almost lost my shit when they pushed Kaspersky via network policy & it broke my VPN. Then I remembered I can just NOT work and get $$ anyway

They also did this shit with the password form where it randomly assigns CSS selectors. HURR DERRR I got around it

Bitches over at dyndns delete your shit if you don't log in monthly. Wrote automation + task scheduler to auto log in every other week. WIN

.@XtinaSchelin Upgrading this release from red hot dumpster fire to yellow hot dumpster fire.

Idiot: "Hey Joe, Can you get me X by tomorrow? No rush."
Me: "ok"
Idiot (2 hrs later): "So did you do it yet?"

#FUCKOFF