Pat: "These Irish boys are just howlin' at the moon right now"

Monday, March 17, 2014 09:31:39 PM from Twitter for Android

Honestly, my gyro cart guy Mohammed is legit the nicest.

Monday, March 17, 2014 07:45:12 PM from Twitter for Android

How am I supposed to carry on with my GSexting if Gchat is down?

Monday, March 17, 2014 01:15:59 PM from Twitter Web Client

After a dev explained how he fixed an infinite loop causing cascading failures in our system: "At least it wasn't a gremlin" - Stein

Monday, March 17, 2014 11:41:59 AM from Twitter Web Client

Not pleased that there's someone with either tuberculosis or lung cancer on this plane. Someone quarantine this bitch!

Sunday, March 16, 2014 02:50:51 PM from Twitter for Android

Is bullshit. Why is this fuckin river not green. The fuck mon

Saturday, March 15, 2014 04:33:02 PM from Twitter for Android

I LOVE how cab in Chicago let you take like 9 people in one car. Would never fly in new York.

Saturday, March 15, 2014 04:22:42 PM from Twitter for Android

RT @chisoxbarstool: If I was married to a supermodel and some website pointed out how huge my son's hog was I'd be effin pumped

Saturday, March 15, 2014 04:02:13 PM from Twitter for Android

These sluts remind me of my cousin

Saturday, March 15, 2014 03:59:56 PM from Twitter for Android

Me three RT @chisoxbarstool Looking back I'm pretty positive I got roofied last night

Saturday, March 15, 2014 03:26:50 PM from Twitter for Android

My boy's visiting NYC next weekend. It's gonna be a faaaahhhkin disaster

Saturday, March 15, 2014 02:59:56 PM from Twitter for Android

I'm wasted

Saturday, March 15, 2014 02:11:42 PM from Twitter for Android

Pretty sure Matt McConaughey is at this party

Saturday, March 15, 2014 01:57:42 PM from Twitter for Android

Just pulled the recovery

Saturday, March 15, 2014 01:55:21 PM from Twitter for Android

I love Chicago. The natives fuck up vowels so hard it hurts

Saturday, March 15, 2014 01:48:12 PM from Twitter for Android