I don't hate the fact that @MalJNew is currently in the mirror practicing the black girl booty twerk
Friday, February 28, 2014 08:07:28 AM from Twitter for Android
You don't even understand the number of dicks everyone here should suck right now.
Thursday, February 27, 2014 05:41:21 PM from Twitter for Android
This meeting is a screamfest
Thursday, February 27, 2014 05:27:01 PM from Twitter for Android
If I ever start managing like McGivern, please do me a favor and shoot me in the fuckin head. We'd all be better off.
Thursday, February 27, 2014 04:05:42 PM from Twitter Web Client
It's hard being young from the slums eatin' 5 cent gums wonderin' where you're next meal's comin from
Thursday, February 27, 2014 03:44:33 PM from Twitter Web Client
@RockNationRadio that was a good one!
Thursday, February 27, 2014 02:27:50 PM from Twitter for Android
Guy just walked into our building wearing a tshirt. Bro. Its like 18 degrees
Thursday, February 27, 2014 02:24:56 PM from Twitter for Android
Average page load time increased from 2-4 seconds for 2 minutes. We are classifying this as an outage. FUCKING IDIOTS
Thursday, February 27, 2014 11:20:16 AM from Twitter Web Client
Didn't even get in yet and this dumb bitch VP is all up my ass because his monitoring triggered 3 false alarms. Bitch, everyone disposes you
Thursday, February 27, 2014 08:42:33 AM from Twitter for Android
10° Standing on this platform because this piece of shit Metro North train is late again. #MTA
Thursday, February 27, 2014 08:07:36 AM from Twitter for Android
OMG this is the sex. Gonna flash custom firmware on this bitch https://t.co/ghSBMhixra
Thursday, February 27, 2014 12:54:20 AM from Twitter Web Client
About to buy a $200 home router because I'm batshit crazy. Fuckin boss tho: http://t.co/c00hbhxeDw
Thursday, February 27, 2014 12:35:21 AM from Twitter Web Client
My express to Scarsdale had to stop at 125th St to "reset something for a minute" 5 minutes ago... Still stopped. #FuckingMTA
Wednesday, February 26, 2014 07:14:37 PM from Twitter for Android
"I think it's really bad not to test stuff" - Groundbreaking comments from our CTO
Wednesday, February 26, 2014 04:41:29 PM from Twitter for Windows
RT @DadBoner: Said, "If I catch a case of the backdoor explosions, I'll be comin' back here to erupt on your car and/or store floor, cornco…
Tuesday, February 25, 2014 09:04:47 PM from Twitter for Android