Cue the wheelchair for this wedding...

Tuesday, May 27, 2014 11:54:25 PM from Twitter for Android

Cuncel game 5

Tuesday, May 27, 2014 10:42:25 PM from Twitter for Android

This Coors Light tastes like Mexican sweaty chlorine pool water

Tuesday, May 27, 2014 10:37:43 PM from Twitter for Android

The fuck is it possible to be that bad on the power play?

Tuesday, May 27, 2014 09:14:10 PM from Twitter for Android

This old bitch singing is pretty shitty

Tuesday, May 27, 2014 08:10:13 PM from Twitter for Android

My boy Pat is a degenerate. Regarding the server maintenance, he sent the best email. "they're like fuck that noise" http://t.co/cgBdX3jxvS

Tuesday, May 27, 2014 09:54:03 AM from Twitter Web Client

Chillin yo

Monday, May 26, 2014 09:18:28 PM from Twitter for Android

I make the worst mojitos in all of the land. Mojito. What. I don't think it's a gay drink.

Monday, May 26, 2014 06:02:20 PM from Twitter for Android

Fucking Time Warner. I logged in on your ISP assholes, you can't even detect me? http://t.co/wwb38JCGwu

Saturday, May 24, 2014 02:41:29 PM from Twitter Web Client

If you're gonna play Creed at the bar, at least play My Own Prison. Not gonna lie, songs not bad.. #barstoolconfessions

Friday, May 23, 2014 04:52:38 PM from Twitter for Android

Who's the dick who is trolling the jukebox with Creed? 3 in a row now...

Friday, May 23, 2014 04:50:59 PM from Twitter for Android

RT @KFCBarstool: If you don't send a girl a picture of your dick in a hot dog bun this holiday weekend, you're doing it wrong.

Friday, May 23, 2014 04:49:13 PM from Twitter for Android

Let me kick it to you a little something like this: I'd rather be a subway performer than to work in this corporate assed startup

Thursday, May 22, 2014 10:05:35 AM from Twitter Web Client

https://t.co/FOuHmCUUd1 This is a good read about why everything is broken and sucks

Thursday, May 22, 2014 12:45:13 AM from Twitter for Android

"Not that I'm promoting prostitution, but I'm promoting prostitution and stripping." -@MalJNew

Wednesday, May 21, 2014 07:37:46 PM from Twitter for Android