Not a good look... @ I 71 http://t.co/8CqOK7FkNE

Friday, July 18, 2014 12:19:58 PM from Instagram

Heading to Cleveland today, sports capital of the US & A! Gonna hang with Lebron, Johnny Football and see this stuff: http://t.co/WFRc0hfTWP

Friday, July 18, 2014 10:50:27 AM from Twitter for Android

my batch scripts tell it like it is http://t.co/HvSGHC22sN

Thursday, July 17, 2014 01:16:33 PM from Twitter Web Client

RT @KFCBarstool: I'm no aviation navigator but you probably shouldn't fly planes over places where people shoot down planes.

Thursday, July 17, 2014 12:55:07 PM from Twitter Web Client

Fantastic news! Bugs I filed in 2010 are just being resolved now

Thursday, July 17, 2014 12:54:35 PM from Twitter Web Client

Protip: Do not watch this video at work and expect NOT to lose your shit in hysteric fits... https://t.co/MRPWdUnBpj

Thursday, July 17, 2014 09:06:54 AM from Twitter Web Client

Boss just proved me wrong in an email. Almost replied "Sorry that my superior brain cannot comprehend poorly designed systems"

Wednesday, July 16, 2014 03:22:36 PM from Twitter Web Client

@DowntownNYC Lower Manhattan is a fucking shithole

Wednesday, July 16, 2014 02:45:40 PM from Twitter Web Client

Our churn is so high, I hope Comcast fired this customer support douche. Would fit right in here @ Booker: https://t.co/mP43ZtlL5l

Wednesday, July 16, 2014 11:01:02 AM from Twitter Web Client

Note to anyone who wakes me up for a non prod incident: Don't do it or I'll shit on your desk

Wednesday, July 16, 2014 10:20:39 AM from Twitter Web Client

Oncall guy yesterday was woken up because QA was down for scheduled maintenance. Fucking morons

Wednesday, July 16, 2014 10:20:01 AM from Twitter Web Client

Thunderstorms in lower Manhattan =. Everyone stand by the windows and watch 1WTC and hope it gets strick by lightning

Tuesday, July 15, 2014 02:21:12 PM from Twitter for Android

My DLink Smart Plug (http://t.co/mFEtrFJ2YT) runs lighttpd. Their management interface sux. I will sniff traffic and figure out their API

Tuesday, July 15, 2014 02:00:45 PM from Twitter Web Client

They try to manage it through their site, but it's slow as hell. I'd rather build an app, forward ports and send CURL requests through.

In reply to @portfolioso's tweet

Tuesday, July 15, 2014 02:03:11 PM from Twitter Web Client

Denis is blasting Russian metal at obnoxious volumes

Tuesday, July 15, 2014 11:39:19 AM from Twitter Web Client