Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

I'm making fun of this idiot suit this entire call. Hope my mic doesn't unmute

Just got screamed at by a rabid Chinese food delivery guy.

Stewie and Brian are wasted

The Ravens are murderers

Someone's blazing the most at this Irish pub

What. It's a beer you sick fucks.

Ryan's daughter's going down real smooth you guys

Eating raw green peppers are surprisingly satisfying right now. DAT crunch. I'm a cray

I instigated a quantum physics argument between our SysOps Russian and the Linux dude. It's been going on for 45 minutes already.

Was trying to invite one of my boys to the bar tomorrow and was trying to say it was a "sick bar" but typo'd it to "dick bar"

@BarstoolJJ IN! How big is the place based on past events? Am I going to have to fight for drinks?

I do not yield to assholes on the sidewalk looking at their phones and walking left. Will plow into them and throw 'bows

I think it's totally justified to take all these terrorists and feed them feet first through a wood chipper for hours while beating them.

Also, if you bring a stroller on a train or subway at rush hour, you're a poor. And inconsiderate.

Dear #MTA. Thanks for making me wait longer on the cold because your 70s trains can't handle a half inch of snow you assholes.