Gf thinks it's acceptable to dip a breadstick into Pillsbury chocolate frosting. Bread stick ≠ pretzel... Savage move.

Wednesday, April 22, 2015 01:02:20 AM from Twitter for Android

I feel bad for the next group of tourists I'm behind that does the rolling sidewalk block.

Tuesday, April 21, 2015 07:07:03 PM from Twitter for Android

This place can eat a dick

Monday, April 20, 2015 02:47:03 PM from Twitter Web Client

Guy. Ya won? Nahhhh. #degenerate http://t.co/IQA9d8CC65

Sunday, April 19, 2015 05:22:34 PM from Twitter for Android

My boy CJ just walked in with the best Drake into ever.

Thursday, April 16, 2015 10:42:43 PM from Twitter for Android

Rangersssssss (@ Break Bar & Billiards - @breakastoria in Astoria, NY w/ @maljnew) https://t.co/hkKBHnSZSs

Thursday, April 16, 2015 07:12:00 PM from Foursquare

Absolutely absurd how hot this train is right now. Not even exaggerating

Thursday, April 16, 2015 08:35:48 AM from Twitter for Android

Most senior customer support rep just told me our clients were having an issue and their ISP was Cisco. #lol

Wednesday, April 15, 2015 01:49:40 PM from Twitter Web Client

Dude. Quiet. Nonstop yappin. Trying to work here

Wednesday, April 15, 2015 09:38:17 AM from Twitter Web Client

Delayed at 125th st because they can't figure out how to close the doors on this fuckin antique piece of shit @MetroNorth train

Monday, April 13, 2015 08:07:50 AM from Twitter for Android

Tomorrow is Thomas Jefferson's birthday, says Google Calendar. No one gives a shit.

Sunday, April 12, 2015 04:00:21 PM from Twitter Web Client

I have no use for Facebook anymore. It was cool when there were networks and it was actually social. Now it's just a link dumping ground

Saturday, April 11, 2015 10:05:18 PM from Twitter Web Client

Was National Siblings Day even a thing last year? Don't remember this much fuss before. Facebook news feed should be renamed to sibling feed

Saturday, April 11, 2015 10:04:18 PM from Twitter Web Client

Blind Mellon right now ⚡⚡

Saturday, April 11, 2015 04:06:45 PM from Twitter for Android

Um. @MalJNew just made the BEST mac and cheese right now. You're jealous. Yes you are.

Friday, April 10, 2015 10:24:28 AM from Twitter Web Client