OMG. @MalJNew is the bestest! Came home from work and have a full bday dinner ready. Cold antipasta, salad, pasta and bracciole! NOMS

Monday, June 01, 2015 07:49:54 PM from Twitter for Android

These fucking cunts are about to ruin my birthday because at 5:32 they JUST realized they're releasing untested code tomorrow you ASSHOLES

Monday, June 01, 2015 05:32:19 PM from Twitter Web Client

Cuncel da USA. Second World Country....
http://t.co/TV2JYEWaJC

Monday, June 01, 2015 04:09:49 PM from Twitter Web Client

I find this hard to believe that 47% of families can't come up with fuckin $400... Who was surveyed? The poors?

In reply to @portfolioso's tweet

Monday, June 01, 2015 04:10:57 PM from Twitter Web Client

@NYCTSubway suck a dick that nothing is running right this morning. You guys are useless

Monday, June 01, 2015 09:22:04 AM from Twitter for Android

@MalJNew Joshie and I are the MOST soaked

In reply to @MalJNew's tweet

Sunday, May 31, 2015 05:13:00 PM from Twitter for Android

@MalJNew @KFCBarstool Big Sexy's RBI double was everything I wanted and more

In reply to @MalJNew's tweet

Sunday, May 31, 2015 04:18:53 PM from Twitter for Android

I am SO pumped to see Big Sexy 'Tolo over at CitiField later. Guy is a character.

Sunday, May 31, 2015 11:01:48 AM from Twitter Web Client

"Google's Internal Code Name For Smart Lock Passwords Is YOLO, You Only Login Once" http://t.co/A2hS52Tx5X @__JLu

Sunday, May 31, 2015 08:22:56 AM from Twitter for Android

BED FINALLY. If I get another alert this weekend, I will punch every single person in the face at work on Monday.

Sunday, May 31, 2015 03:06:18 AM from Twitter for Android

See thing is New Relic is never fucking wrong and the idiot suits at my company use other horse shit alerting that is BS and always FALSE

Sunday, May 31, 2015 02:56:21 AM from Twitter Web Client

Oh for fucks sake with these alerts. #HATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATE

Sunday, May 31, 2015 02:12:04 AM from Twitter Web Client

These cunts are actually making me fail over our always on cluster right now

Sunday, May 31, 2015 01:03:47 AM from Twitter Web Client

RT @NYC_LTrain: That's the spa car, you ungrateful tweet whining dolt. https://t.co/dOIMZqLFuE

Saturday, May 30, 2015 08:36:41 PM from Twitter for Android

@NYCTSubway L train car 8193 has no A/C. Take it out of service and fix it you fare raising inferior fools.

Saturday, May 30, 2015 07:42:15 PM from Twitter for Android