That time you have to piss and you didn't even take off yet. This is why you don't get hammered before flights
Monday, September 14, 2015 03:39:03 PM from Twitter for Android
Can I Seamless food to the gate at LaGuardia when I've landed? #fatfuck
Monday, September 14, 2015 03:36:45 PM from Twitter for Android
Also, fuck airplane mode. The frequency phones run on won't conflict with the airplane shit. So I am tweeting this as we take off. I'll live
Monday, September 14, 2015 03:34:13 PM from Twitter for Android
You've gotta be a giant vajay to be secured by a plane seatbelt.
Monday, September 14, 2015 03:32:58 PM from Twitter for Android
Oh wait plane seatbelts protect you from turbulence? You ever ride the NYC subways? Shit's 95 times worse than turbulence.
Monday, September 14, 2015 03:32:10 PM from Twitter for Android
Plane seatbelts are the stupidest things ever. Like... If the plane crashed, it's not going to save you.
Monday, September 14, 2015 03:30:37 PM from Twitter for Android
Eli with the sizzzz pass... To the cameraman
Sunday, September 13, 2015 11:39:43 PM from Twitter for Android
New blog post: Middle Managers Basiclly Want to Kill Themselves http://t.co/f3dNoyqFpS
Saturday, September 12, 2015 06:35:56 PM from Portfolioso.com Blog
@BarstoolJJ DEEZ NUTZZZ
Saturday, September 12, 2015 03:39:12 PM from Twitter Web Client
another test
Saturday, September 12, 2015 03:38:32 PM from Twitter Web Client
New blog post: test http://t.co/3zzMdCR0iH
Saturday, September 12, 2015 03:38:04 PM from Portfolioso.com Blog
Ate a 3/4 lb burger today like a fat fuck and now my rotten cow meat farts are putrid #tmi
Saturday, September 12, 2015 04:15:43 AM from Twitter for Android
Temporarily needed to go private because of crazy spammers
Thursday, September 10, 2015 09:22:42 AM from Twitter for Android
UM PUT ON VH1 CLASSIC IMMIJITLY. IT'S LIKE 90s ROCK VIDEOS (PS VH1 Classic? Really? I'm so old)
Wednesday, September 09, 2015 01:37:49 PM from Twitter Web Client
Good. Hope this hedge fund guy destroys them. Fuck Herbalife. I unfollowed someone for being obsessed with that shit http://t.co/rTBwOOUS4e
Wednesday, September 09, 2015 11:28:25 AM from Twitter for Android