Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

I fuckin hate restroom attendants when I only have 20s and can't tip them. #awk

@KFCBarstool Where's the original cuncel da saeson article? It got lost with the devnest disaster: https://t.co/SIC8mdIgqX

Error handling, ya friggin joke faces

This place. Got a sql job failing and waking up a DBA every night b/c some asshole's name in the system is 'Michael♪' instead of 'Michael'

Shhh. Don't tell anyone but 90s one hit wonder radio is on. "Natalie Imbruglia - Torn" came on and I got a little giddy

(What’s your name?)
T-Good
(What you do?)
I’m a plumber
(How you do it?)
I lay the pipe for that ass and make her dance
(True)

Badgalriri

ARNIE P's AND TITOS FOR DAYS

I was just spittin some of Kayne's Monster. Coworker walked by and thought I was insulting him

When your SMS inbox is spammed by 2FA requests @sadoperator https://t.co/RzgIAMryf2

This old dude on the train. His snowy white beard is glimmering majestically. Dude's got glitter in his beard. Sandy Claus?

New blog post: If You Get a Rare Bacterial Infection Because You Decided to Get Surgery in the DR, You're an Asshole https://t.co/1fS5VHafid

Golf Channel is on at the bar. Chick in the "ship sticks" commercial for shipping golf clubs has a beyond huge rack

A year ago I was all giddy over Pluto because I'm a huge nerd https://t.co/LlWEpDFGVU