It's convoluted how Azure VMs are backed up or snapshotted. Holy Christ.

Monday, August 22, 2016 02:00:27 AM from Twitter Web Client

Just frombled

Sunday, August 21, 2016 02:20:10 AM from Twitter for Android

Mal's the brilliant author of my IT guy's tinder. Epic times.

Sunday, August 21, 2016 02:04:34 AM from Twitter for Android

I've got a guy at my party dancing with potato salad refusing to give Freddy any.

Sunday, August 21, 2016 01:52:21 AM from Twitter for Android

Freddy is flat out waving at a chick across the way and smiling at her like a goofball

Sunday, August 21, 2016 01:44:43 AM from Twitter for Android

Fill a balloon with hydrogen and light it. Imagine if that was a big bang, and that instant took billions of years and formed all of space?

Saturday, August 20, 2016 04:10:20 AM from Twitter for Android

Complete bullshit I cannot make it to the @Fantasy_Mania draft. Send my regards to those sausage and peppers mañana

Friday, August 19, 2016 11:02:36 PM from Twitter for Android

I will reiterate a quote from my boy Derick circa 2011: "them n**** is fuckin"

Friday, August 19, 2016 11:00:22 PM from Twitter for Android

Just pouring myself some Tito's. CEO was directly behind me. NBD

Friday, August 19, 2016 05:15:40 PM from Twitter Web Client

I apologize in advance for my tweets later tonight #sorrynotsorry

Friday, August 19, 2016 03:20:52 PM from Twitter Web Client

The IT guys are usually always mad at me

Friday, August 19, 2016 03:02:50 PM from Twitter Web Client

Our VP of sales walked into a bar

Thursday, August 18, 2016 12:10:27 AM from Twitter for Android

@_Frankalank Nassau Bar in lower Manhattan

Wednesday, August 17, 2016 09:23:07 PM from Twitter for Android