Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

Yo @Corning blow me. Gorilla Glass works real well. #cunts https://t.co/bj42eLXah3

This is the first smartphone screen I shattered... And I was stone cold sober.

I just dropped my fucking phone flat on its fucking screen on concrete and now it doesn't work at all. It made it 1.5 years I guess

Always get the worst fomo when I day drink, take a nap, and sleep through the part 2 rally

Very behind on my day drinking rn. Should have been at the tailgate 2 hours ago

Review: Can I get a pizza with that oregano? https://t.co/1fGgrh0o77

@Windows Why does my key repeat rate keep changing to be slow. Also, the setting in the control panel is busted https://t.co/x9YGcZw4Kt

Windows 10 sucks a cock because of its slow assed key repeat rate. Drives me up the wall. https://t.co/x9YGcZNFC1

Also, Emma Stone is bae https://t.co/2JtYflZOMH

It was a great idea to start Superbad on Netflix... This is taking me back, I'm dying rn

Picked up a Gronk Monster energy at the gas station because Gronk is bro af. It markets itself.

Let's face it, I may have had had some booze tho. It's Friday and I WFH and it's 75 outside https://t.co/BmtAaS1o90

Also, the fiancée was NOT pleased with me. She was in the middle of picking out her wedding shoes; I was laughing at a Bieber dick tweet

I am not proud of the fact that I [soberly] laughed at the Biebs tweeting about his dick area for 5 mins..

I legit laughed at "dick area" for 5 minutes straight https://t.co/dguzTXFOP0