Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

Last night was worse than my bachelor party

What the actual fuck happened last night?

I hope Otto pilot does well

Cuncel my fantasy team

@portfolioso cya in 2018

I just cancelled the rest of my work day because I accidentally went to O'Hara's

Scientific study just said phone addiction is worse than coke addiction. Same area of the brain triggered. I should have just taken up drugs

Got a guy playing Meteora on the jukebox at the bar. Haven't heard that in 10 yrs. Takes me back to high school

Time to go to the mofuggin bar

New blog post: Bunch of Pussy TSA Workers Get Their Eyes Irritated at LGA Because Of Someone's Food https://t.co/rWRVbNto8n

Great administration we've got going on here. Your ISPs can now sell your data and the environment has been cuncelled.

Nah son. Someone set the background color to black and deleted a circle shape in MS Paint https://t.co/PzkhT9wrUt

Fiancee went to the pet store to get dog food and I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if we had two dogs when I get back home.

The crazy Russian bastards I work with are trying to get me to go to a Russian bath house in deep Brooklyn aka Russia 2.0 and I'm scared

Would be nice if #thefuckingsubway didn't decide to park in between stations when I have another train to catch