My boss needs to eat a dick, the director of Architecture needs to eat a dick and the CTO also needs to eat a dick
Tuesday, August 01, 2017 05:53:31 PM from Twitter Web Client
Azure sucks a cock
Tuesday, August 01, 2017 04:40:17 PM from Twitter Web Client
Hey @Ticketmaster, eat a dick. How are you charging $11.15 in fees for ONE $37.50 ticket? ~30% of the original ticket price is added fees! https://t.co/wOV1stLdOY
Indians are on TV and my boy @a_miller48 just came in. I called him my homeskillet and Mal just told me I was in middle school.
It's taco Tuesday. I already had too many house margs, and I just spilled salsa on my dick area (to quote the Biebs)
I want a cheeseburger
Out at a show and wifey's all like "You're grabbing my ass a lot tonight"
No kidding. You want me to grab other girls' asses?
I called it. I said Judge was hitting one to the moon. Next pitch. Dinger.
Wife stole her friend's phone and is Tindering and doesn't know her left from right
My cousin went to a Michelle Branch concert a couple days ago in Seattle and I'm like still jelly.
I'm gonna go be wreckless so like. Bottoms up I don't get arrested or some shit. Good day.
Wednesday, July 19, 2017 10:54:26 PM from Twitter for Android
Everything's a fucking disaster
Wednesday, July 19, 2017 09:22:46 PM from Twitter for Android
So can I mute GoT tweets?
$30 Uber home because the wife decided to drink all day long instead of not drinking all day long and picking me up instead 😎😁
Airplane mode is a myth made up by people who don't understand physics. If it were really that dangerous, they'd make us check our phones.