My best friend said she used to fuck with Usher

Thursday, June 01, 2017 11:36:00 PM from Twitter for Android

Literally it's the clurb https://t.co/VyntPobe4w

Thursday, June 01, 2017 11:28:48 PM from Twitter for Android

Piano bar's all turnt now

Thursday, June 01, 2017 11:15:47 PM from Twitter for Android

Mal and I are stealing this piano bar player

Thursday, June 01, 2017 10:57:13 PM from Twitter for Android

The piano bar is the tits

Thursday, June 01, 2017 10:31:32 PM from Twitter for Android

@TwitterMoments Way to disobey the pope you dumb cunt

In reply to @TwitterMoments's tweet

Thursday, June 01, 2017 09:17:52 PM from Twitter for Android

Steel drums are the tits

Thursday, June 01, 2017 09:12:56 PM from Twitter for Android

Cuncel da environment https://t.co/a6xqG8cvPJ

Thursday, June 01, 2017 09:11:17 PM from Twitter for Android

Mmmm. Breakfast alcohol! #baecation starts now. Honeymoon preppin' https://t.co/h2LYUT3oAO

Tuesday, May 30, 2017 12:47:35 PM from Twitter for Android

No specials? No credit cards? No Gio.

Monday, May 29, 2017 05:17:51 PM from Twitter for Android

Dan? Mothafuckin G. Danny? Passed out on the couch.

Saturday, May 27, 2017 02:39:18 AM from Twitter for Android

I just lost my beer again

Saturday, May 27, 2017 02:35:37 AM from Twitter for Android

Got another groomsman rapping biggie over sublime beats for the win. Shit's turnt

Saturday, May 27, 2017 02:20:05 AM from Twitter for Android

Folks. I wish I can make this up, but I am not bullshitting you. I'm not that creative https://t.co/9iBFj9zu9K

Saturday, May 27, 2017 02:18:38 AM from Twitter for Android

My wedding officiant is stealing the best man's socks and trying to feed them to my dog. I've made very good life decisions.

Saturday, May 27, 2017 02:17:22 AM from Twitter for Android