5975 tweets posted from Twitter Web Client
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Then they wonder why half the fucking tech team quit. Monday, August 17, 2015 10:55:00 AMTwitter Web Client
cunts Monday, August 17, 2015 10:54:23 AMTwitter Web Client
Nobody wants to hear this fucking bumbling idiot taking about idiotic things while smart people are actually doing a hands on maintenance Monday, August 17, 2015 10:54:15 AMTwitter Web Client
We must #FundEducation to #LetGirlsLearn & lead—@erna_solberg come to #GlobalCitizen Festival & support education http://t.co/w7HQv2haRt Friday, August 14, 2015 7:52:08 PMTwitter Web Client
I really don't like Samsung Galaxy phones. No one cares about your stupid press announcement. Go away. Friday, August 14, 2015 7:46:14 PMTwitter Web Client
Africa just marked 1 year w/o a case of #polio. @TonyAbbottMHR @David_Cameron now commit to ending polio for good at this year's #CHOGM Friday, August 14, 2015 7:13:09 PMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew http://t.co/3PXnN8vjBg
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
Friday, August 14, 2015 6:43:58 PMTwitter Web Client
ATTENTION EVERYONE: HOP OFF MY DICK

Seriously. Why do you need me to get anything done. Shut up and figure it out like I can.
Wednesday, August 12, 2015 4:17:20 PMTwitter Web Client
You can't lose to a fuckin last place team in 16 innings. Just can't. This is a playoff race. Christ. Wednesday, August 12, 2015 10:56:20 AMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew I warned ya.
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
Tuesday, August 11, 2015 1:19:49 PMTwitter Web Client
http://t.co/RAs3tsJExS @Fantasy_Mania @Onethirdof3x5 Tuesday, August 11, 2015 12:04:52 PMTwitter Web Client
Whoops. I meant to say 2) Looks that color... I said the same thing twice.
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Monday, August 10, 2015 11:01:29 AMTwitter Web Client
What kind of dumb bitch would drink water that 1) has a known toxic spill and 2) Has known toxic waste in it. http://t.co/mnnU0wJs7f Monday, August 10, 2015 10:00:55 AMTwitter Web Client
Anyone who actually purchased Whole Foods' "asparagus water" should be executed for stupidity. Can't have the stupid genes in the pool. Monday, August 10, 2015 9:41:42 AMTwitter Web Client
EPA: "Welp, we were trying to clean up shit but instead we accidentally dumped 3 mil gallons into the river."

Assholes should go to prison
Monday, August 10, 2015 9:39:59 AMTwitter Web Client
I'm in an aggressive, no bullshit mood this morning. I'm already ready to start punching our idiot L1 support reps in the face. Monday, August 10, 2015 9:36:01 AMTwitter Web Client
Gunjan: "They made this Indian food the white person way" Friday, August 07, 2015 12:37:33 PMTwitter Web Client
zzZZZzzZZzZZZ. Don't want to hear all this boring babble. I want some Trump flame wars. Thursday, August 06, 2015 9:33:29 PMTwitter Web Client
Jeb looked like a toolbag staring Trump down Thursday, August 06, 2015 9:25:37 PMTwitter Web Client
LOL Donald Trump Thursday, August 06, 2015 9:12:02 PMTwitter Web Client
@Docent_Steve Hahah, it was awesome and noms though
In reply to @Docent_Steve's tweet
Thursday, August 06, 2015 9:02:53 PMTwitter Web Client
Why the fuck does Windows 10 keep automatically installing the "Get Office" app. I uninstalled it twice and I already have office. GTFO Tuesday, August 04, 2015 10:13:44 PMTwitter Web Client
Why is this guy here every 5 mins with password problems?
If you can't figure out how to log into basic shit, you shouldn't work here.
Fired
Tuesday, August 04, 2015 3:56:54 PMTwitter Web Client
If I could be anywhere right now, it'd be here: https://t.co/KN7wjfur6W Monday, August 03, 2015 5:23:11 PMTwitter Web Client
I feel like an asshole to my followers for all this because I despise spammers. Sorry. They are good causes though. Monday, August 03, 2015 11:17:32 AMTwitter Web Client
.@MFAIceland & @SCpresidenciauy thanks for standing up for women around the world—Now come to #GlobalCitizen Festival & make a commitment! Monday, August 03, 2015 11:17:03 AMTwitter Web Client
To end open defecation we need to talk about it. @JimKim_WBG & @sesamestreet have an important message, WATCH: http://t.co/3sg73yiDJ7 Monday, August 03, 2015 11:14:33 AMTwitter Web Client
We are 1% away from ending polio for good—@dfat @CanadaFP will you make #polio a priority at this year’s #CHOGM? #whatnext Monday, August 03, 2015 11:13:17 AMTwitter Web Client
You'll need to excuse my upcoming Twitter feed spam. Trying to get those Pearl Jam tickets. Also, we should probably eradicate polio too Monday, August 03, 2015 11:13:11 AMTwitter Web Client
Is it me, or is Gmail all jacked up right now? Seems like Google had issues every time I tried to use it. Hmph Monday, August 03, 2015 1:04:38 AMTwitter Web Client
Is it me, or is Google and Google Maps down/really slow right now? Had to use Bing and it worked like a charm Sunday, August 02, 2015 12:38:26 PMTwitter Web Client
Needless to say, we probably should get a more powerful message queuing server. http://t.co/BkTnmjPtro Saturday, August 01, 2015 10:01:04 PMTwitter Web Client
Shut the fuck up. Trying to fix a broken build Thursday, July 30, 2015 5:39:10 PMTwitter Web Client
git config --global alias.poop push
git poop
Thursday, July 30, 2015 4:18:45 PMTwitter Web Client
I also don't give a fuck what this guy's blabbering about. Thursday, July 30, 2015 2:54:46 PMTwitter Web Client
NYC's a god damn jungle right now. It's legit 100% humidity and downpouring on and off every 5 mins all day Thursday, July 30, 2015 2:49:10 PMTwitter Web Client
Jesus fucking Christ, Alexey. Relax Wednesday, July 29, 2015 10:52:18 AMTwitter Web Client
Moto X Pure has an LCD screen. How are you going to save battery on Active Display? Now we need to turn the whole backlight on :/ #AskMoto Tuesday, July 28, 2015 1:34:20 PMTwitter Web Client
OMG MOTOROLA EVENT #needanewmotox Tuesday, July 28, 2015 9:02:01 AMTwitter Web Client
@TWC_Help Nevermind. It's fine now
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Tuesday, July 28, 2015 2:39:49 AMTwitter Web Client
@TWC_Help Figure out why my speed is bullshit right now and please fix it. I have work to do in the morning http://t.co/duAZzxgZnP Tuesday, July 28, 2015 2:28:53 AMTwitter Web Client
VMWareTools is a huge pain in the fuckin ass Monday, July 27, 2015 5:10:14 PMTwitter Web Client
Better not disappoint. https://t.co/2A4QIMSkFE Monday, July 27, 2015 1:35:32 PMTwitter Web Client
Cut me off again and I'm moving to Andrew's team, cunt Monday, July 27, 2015 11:03:40 AMTwitter Web Client
Can't even filter by "submitted by" for user stories in our agile tracking software. Piece of crap Friday, July 24, 2015 1:42:22 PMTwitter Web Client
Shouldn't have had Mexican for lunch AND dinner yesterday. I'm at an all day offsite meeting. Use your imagination Thursday, July 23, 2015 5:03:53 PMTwitter Web Client
Get a load of Cuba making medical breakthroughs: http://t.co/Lbavm3De7B

Merica. No longer on top,
Tuesday, July 21, 2015 1:24:21 PMTwitter Web Client
Why are you using Adobe Flash to stream video instead of HTML5? It's not rocket science #askNASA Wednesday, July 15, 2015 3:18:53 PMTwitter Web Client
Hydra looks like a buncha pixels Wednesday, July 15, 2015 3:08:41 PMTwitter Web Client
Amazon Prime fire sale is BOSS. Too bad I don't need anything Wednesday, July 15, 2015 11:44:57 AMTwitter Web Client
This bitch ass client is doing data loads and woke me up because their piece of shit system has un-optimized code and our monitoring blows Wednesday, July 15, 2015 4:07:32 AMTwitter Web Client
Cancel the whole rollout for one minor error that only affects one client and isn't even visible. You fucking cunts Monday, July 13, 2015 3:04:44 AMTwitter Web Client
The Arabian music on Narinder's skype during this rollout needs to stop. Monday, July 13, 2015 12:49:26 AMTwitter Web Client
RT @FeitsBarstool: I'm positive America is getting cyber attacked rn and I've seen A Good Day to Die Hard so I know what I'm talking about Wednesday, July 08, 2015 12:13:02 PMTwitter Web Client
TEST Sunday, July 05, 2015 4:31:35 PMTwitter Web Client
SHIT SHIT SHIT http://t.co/PoVfQQPRiJ Sunday, July 05, 2015 1:02:36 PMTwitter Web Client
Blazing fast Verizon 4G at LaGuardia Airport: http://t.co/NYtbTHR1hR Wednesday, July 01, 2015 11:34:25 AMTwitter Web Client
To the 24 y/o construction worker @ the bar who kept sayin he made 6 figures: Eat a dick. Some of us work our asses off for shit office jobs Tuesday, June 30, 2015 6:52:51 PMTwitter Web Client
Damnit @Docent_Steve. Thanks for leaving. All of the oncall overrides are jacked since you left and I went on vacation ;)

PS Enjoyyyyyyy
Tuesday, June 30, 2015 6:15:45 PMTwitter Web Client
So uhhhh... What 'other' gender exists? I identify as "SUPERMALE" DUH
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Tuesday, June 30, 2015 6:10:02 PMTwitter Web Client
From a Microsoft survey... This question has come a long way since male/female http://t.co/6KlW1WHARX Tuesday, June 30, 2015 6:09:21 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm hammered right now Tuesday, June 30, 2015 6:04:32 PMTwitter Web Client
Our security guy is a cunt Tuesday, June 30, 2015 5:58:47 PMTwitter Web Client
BRB. Emergency trip to this titty bar Tuesday, June 30, 2015 4:31:25 PMTwitter Web Client
is the keg open yet. Mas booze por favor Tuesday, June 30, 2015 2:37:29 PMTwitter Web Client
#penis2010
cc: @__JLu, @MalJNew

PS: LUDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA http://t.co/ngVKjSRx6y
Friday, June 26, 2015 5:07:46 PMTwitter Web Client
I AM THIS DEFEATED RIGHT NOW
https://t.co/0AMbjGCEd7
Wednesday, June 24, 2015 1:37:35 PMTwitter Web Client
Not a single fuck is being given on this call. Everyone is completely ignoring this VP Wednesday, June 24, 2015 10:41:37 AMTwitter Web Client
GoDaddy is a fucking piece of shit. Tried to leave them when they supported SOPA in the day, and their Admin Console is dick. Wednesday, June 24, 2015 10:30:54 AMTwitter Web Client
Get the fuck off my team, CC Sabbathia edition. Guy sucks a dick Wednesday, June 24, 2015 9:48:14 AMTwitter Web Client
Let me consult with my internet streaming and licensing specialist, Taylor Swift...

Fucking TSwift... Who do you think you are?
Tuesday, June 23, 2015 1:11:40 PMTwitter Web Client
STFU. Guy talks too much Thursday, June 18, 2015 12:20:51 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm not giving some piece of shit no name bank my SSN. Youcan keep your fucking $100. Not worth my identity stolen. Fucking scammers. Tuesday, June 16, 2015 5:52:00 PMTwitter Web Client
Basically have a piece of plastic. No one ever buy this fucking Green Dot shit. I don't need to "register" it. Use AMEX gift cards instead. Tuesday, June 16, 2015 5:51:27 PMTwitter Web Client
Someone gave me a Green Dot card as a gift and FUCK THEM because it doesn't work like an AMEX gift card... Need to register it with your SSN Tuesday, June 16, 2015 5:49:51 PMTwitter Web Client
I think I legit blacked out at the ATM. Don't remember taking my money from the slot, but apparently, I have it. Tuesday, June 16, 2015 3:55:19 PMTwitter Web Client
@RMerlinDev Quick q. If I never used AiProtection ad blocker and flash 378.54_1 to my RT-AC68U, do I still need to run those commands? Wednesday, June 10, 2015 10:41:09 AMTwitter Web Client
I'll bet you this suit gets so hard when he clicks approve on change requests. MAD POWER BRO Tuesday, June 09, 2015 4:25:36 PMTwitter Web Client
Eat a dick dot info. I dont care how much I fuck up, at the end of the day Joe and Joe are the only people who can fix shit Tuesday, June 09, 2015 4:03:47 PMTwitter Web Client
This veal parm sangwich I got from Mama Carmela's is bigger than my forearm Tuesday, June 09, 2015 3:31:35 PMTwitter Web Client
This horse shit assed release is preventing like half of these motherfuckers from logging in. Let's focus on that and not how I fucked up Tuesday, June 09, 2015 2:27:48 PMTwitter Web Client
THIS ENTIRE PLATFORM SUCKS A DICK Tuesday, June 09, 2015 12:02:02 PMTwitter Web Client
Big Sexy Bartolo Colon has more points than every pitcher I own in fantasy except Gerrit Cole. And my team's doing really well Tuesday, June 09, 2015 11:25:55 AMTwitter Web Client
Gotta make sure they get that change control ticket in tho. Not that there's one for the same maintenance we couldn't get right the 1st time Tuesday, June 09, 2015 10:37:44 AMTwitter Web Client
F- rollout for all teams involved. Dev team for bugs, another team for config stupidity, me for being dyslexic and suits for overreacting! Tuesday, June 09, 2015 9:45:21 AMTwitter Web Client
I suck Tuesday, June 09, 2015 9:41:32 AMTwitter Web Client
Hey! My rollback scripts actually work! Tuesday, June 09, 2015 9:38:17 AMTwitter Web Client
Two new errors in the logs with the new deployment: EVERYONE PANIC Tuesday, June 09, 2015 8:38:41 AMTwitter Web Client
git push
💩💩💩
Monday, June 08, 2015 4:12:32 PMTwitter Web Client
New QA manager started today and cannot follow simple login instructions Monday, June 08, 2015 2:30:46 PMTwitter Web Client
I can't get fucking github to work with putty, plink and pageant. This is pissing me off. Thursday, June 04, 2015 5:34:54 PMTwitter Web Client
deez nuts: https://t.co/6OLNarGsLs Wednesday, June 03, 2015 5:14:19 PMTwitter Web Client
Our security guy is now sending us one ticket per vulnerability. We have scheduled patching you fucking idiot Wednesday, June 03, 2015 4:04:33 PMTwitter Web Client
Dumb motherfucker's been here 7 years and doesn't know how to reset her password on the system she's SELLING to people. I GIVE UP Wednesday, June 03, 2015 4:01:08 PMTwitter Web Client
LOL at Microsoft's fix... They didn't actually fix the overflow... They just prevent the message from being delivered in the new clients Wednesday, June 03, 2015 11:01:47 AMTwitter Web Client
I haven't had this much fun since the AIM buffer overflow html exploits back in 2002-2006 Wednesday, June 03, 2015 10:58:23 AMTwitter Web Client
Everyone go ahead and crash everyone's Skypes by sending this string from a Mac or Windows 8 client

http://:
Wednesday, June 03, 2015 10:54:17 AMTwitter Web Client
DOM ≠ DNS you fucking Vice President asshole Wednesday, June 03, 2015 10:33:43 AMTwitter Web Client
This city is going to shit with this moron https://t.co/WP3kx9TKCF Tuesday, June 02, 2015 5:45:23 PMTwitter Web Client
Homeboy just dropped a delivery to my desk and I have absolutely no fucking idea what I'm going to do with this package for a day or so... Tuesday, June 02, 2015 5:12:29 PMTwitter Web Client