5975 tweets posted from Twitter Web Client
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@Fantasy_Mania Wanna do some dudes? Tuesday, February 26, 2013 9:55:22 PMTwitter Web Client
Just observed my ass in the mirror and it was excellent. Which reminds me that I shouldn't have a daughter. Tuesday, February 26, 2013 9:55:07 PMTwitter Web Client
Fuckin hicks: http://t.co/c8IxL0w3VE I didn't know they had internet in West Virginia. Tuesday, February 26, 2013 5:13:28 PMTwitter Web Client
Fuckin @newrelic... Took me fuckin 2 hours to get our .NET ,onitoring back up Tuesday, February 26, 2013 7:12:15 AMTwitter Web Client
What the fuck. Is this shit? http://t.co/QMj836SeKD Friday, February 22, 2013 3:58:16 PMTwitter Web Client
My tamagotchi shits a lot (like it's owner) Friday, February 22, 2013 12:18:01 PMTwitter Web Client
Fuckin Gmail. When I click Save on the Settings page, do NOT redirect me to my inbox. What if I want to change more settings? Asshats Friday, February 22, 2013 1:23:04 AMTwitter Web Client
Xtina: "My fist. Your face" Thursday, February 21, 2013 5:03:37 PMTwitter Web Client
Fuck the California office and the Harlem Shake. It's old bro. They dont do jack shit out there. Shawn is also a smug bitch. Thursday, February 21, 2013 2:29:48 PMTwitter Web Client
Drives me absolutely BATSHIT in Gmail that it includes your signature on replies/forwards. It should be hidden there! Wednesday, February 20, 2013 10:24:37 PMTwitter Web Client
Probably going to quit drinking until this wedding so I can fit into my suit because I'm a porker / I don't want to spend money on a new one Wednesday, February 20, 2013 3:43:02 PMTwitter Web Client
Ya gotta put those things away. For real. I am being distracted. #boobies Wednesday, February 20, 2013 3:28:49 PMTwitter Web Client
Protip: When pissed off, blast Rage Against the Machine loudly and Enjoy Wednesday, February 20, 2013 1:05:38 PMTwitter Web Client
Oh man. Just got the worst look from our CEO as he walked by. Awk nod. Yep. All my fault the dev team can't get their lives together. Wednesday, February 20, 2013 9:59:01 AMTwitter Web Client
This sums up where the fuck I work: http://t.co/vphfsPF Tuesday, February 19, 2013 9:04:43 PMTwitter Web Client
And the tamagotchi in my app just died. The fuck. I kept it happy and fed Tuesday, February 19, 2013 8:59:10 PMTwitter Web Client
How awesome is @MalJNew? Super awesome. I'm over here raging at people and grumpy and she brings me back lunch! Tuesday, February 19, 2013 1:46:37 PMTwitter Web Client
Fuck this place. Instant eye twitch from these bastards. Tuesday, February 19, 2013 11:34:01 AMTwitter Web Client
I walk into this fuckin shithole and found out that no one followed any procedures. And it's all up to me to fix. Fuckers Tuesday, February 19, 2013 11:33:48 AMTwitter Web Client
Cool foursquare app: https://t.co/HD4CWyd @__JLu @MalJNew Thursday, February 14, 2013 1:54:49 PMTwitter Web Client
showed up to work outside of my mind. Hughlon came over for some tasks and I couldn't function. jeez... Thursday, February 14, 2013 1:22:17 PMTwitter Web Client
Where the fuck is my dev team? And I was the one out being cray last night. Why am I the only one here? Thursday, February 14, 2013 9:10:43 AMTwitter Web Client
Fuckin Marketing department (everyone except Molly) being a bunch of assholes not listening to anything I say when I obvi know best. Suffer Wednesday, February 13, 2013 3:22:28 PMTwitter Web Client
Anyone watch the State of the Union? Neither did I #moreemptypromisescunts #notfree Wednesday, February 13, 2013 12:26:48 AMTwitter Web Client
SQL SERVER IS ACTING A FOOL RIGHT NOW. suck it the most, Wednesday, February 13, 2013 12:25:33 AMTwitter Web Client
Thanks for the Mardi Gras cake, @mollyCsouthern It was delicious. You's the best! Tuesday, February 12, 2013 4:38:15 PMTwitter Web Client
God damn it Christina. Don't put cheese in front of me. I'm damn huge Tuesday, February 12, 2013 4:20:17 PMTwitter Web Client
@smstemp I mean... Despite that article/ Everyone's ripping on her, but e.. It's not the worst thing I've seen.
In reply to @smstemp's tweet
Tuesday, February 12, 2013 3:50:51 PMTwitter Web Client
Xtina: "If they come over here and don't appreciate our language, they can go fuck themselves" Tuesday, February 12, 2013 3:47:14 PMTwitter Web Client
@smstemp http://t.co/vxWb9lR
In reply to @smstemp's tweet
Tuesday, February 12, 2013 3:44:45 PMTwitter Web Client
jquery load() - suck a dick. Why am I a slow at JavaScript? Monday, February 11, 2013 8:37:15 PMTwitter Web Client
Welp, looks like the frontend guys started drinking Monday, February 11, 2013 4:47:24 PMTwitter Web Client
Gio: "I did Windows Update for the first time since like, 1987" Monday, February 11, 2013 3:46:33 PMTwitter Web Client
They refuse to buy me compressed air, so I used a CO2 fire extinguisher to dust my keyboard. Got evil looks from the COO. Not evil. Awesome Friday, February 08, 2013 11:36:06 AMTwitter Web Client
Our account manager at RackSpace is a smokeshow Friday, February 08, 2013 11:11:56 AMTwitter Web Client
I'm a crazy ass bitch Friday, February 08, 2013 10:39:03 AMTwitter Web Client
Xtina: "who needs a build bot when we have joe?" Thursday, February 07, 2013 6:46:12 PMTwitter Web Client
'bout fuckin time we're about to get some snow up in this bitch Thursday, February 07, 2013 5:10:37 PMTwitter Web Client
Will all you motherfuckers let me concentrate on just one task. It's been a nonstop parade of people here. Wednesday, February 06, 2013 10:06:49 AMTwitter Web Client
For fuck's sake. I went to resize a cloud server and took out all of our mobile apps... Fucking RackSpace Cloud Wednesday, February 06, 2013 1:27:02 AMTwitter Web Client
Yan Kravchenko can officially suck a huge dick and choke on it Tuesday, February 05, 2013 5:35:48 PMTwitter Web Client
Xtina: "Do you drink milk? So basically... You're sucking off a cow." Tuesday, February 05, 2013 4:42:09 PMTwitter Web Client
AHHHHHHHHH... Your mother's sandy.... Who's the dick who didn't install SQL Server Enterprise. Standard is for pussies. Tuesday, February 05, 2013 3:21:58 PMTwitter Web Client
@kerbear88 What'd you get?
In reply to @kerbear88's tweet
Tuesday, February 05, 2013 2:13:20 PMTwitter Web Client
Deat MTA alerts. I could give a fuck that your traintime app is down. Stop emailing me every 5 minutes and actually fix it. Wastes Tuesday, February 05, 2013 9:51:56 AMTwitter Web Client
How you know I'm a fat fuck: I just snapped a metal wheel in two on my rolling chair because I was leaning in one direction on it. Tuesday, February 05, 2013 1:48:31 AMTwitter Web Client
I'm such a data nerd... My most tweets I've ever sent in one month were 304 in May 2012 Monday, February 04, 2013 8:31:24 PMTwitter Web Client
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. Just downloaded my whole tweet archive from twitter. Now to import the ones I missed into my app... Monday, February 04, 2013 8:09:06 PMTwitter Web Client
Is it me, or is Firefox a hideous piece of shit? Monday, February 04, 2013 4:41:36 PMTwitter Web Client
@kerbear88 Fuck those trains. Jammed like crazy this morning and all delayed. If you rely on the 4/5/6 trains, you made poor life decisions.
In reply to @kerbear88's tweet
Monday, February 04, 2013 10:00:11 AMTwitter Web Client
Welp, looks like some terrorists bombed a US Embassy in Turkey. We should start a war with Turkey. #sarcasm Friday, February 01, 2013 12:40:45 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm nerding out about metro.css with Xtina. METRO IS PRETTY Friday, February 01, 2013 11:41:12 AMTwitter Web Client
buy me nevermind on vinyl cunts Friday, February 01, 2013 11:13:58 AMTwitter Web Client
Wouldn't mind being this drumset so Dave can bang me http://t.co/HgoNRJy Friday, February 01, 2013 2:15:08 AMTwitter Web Client
Daniel keeps forgetting to give me permission to access something that he's requiring me to complete by today, even though I reminded him 3x Thursday, January 31, 2013 1:09:56 PMTwitter Web Client
Mind. Blown. http://t.co/gS8ZxTY Thursday, January 31, 2013 11:25:17 AMTwitter Web Client
Might shake a bitch Wednesday, January 30, 2013 5:29:52 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm too fucking good for this place. die. Wednesday, January 30, 2013 5:14:11 PMTwitter Web Client
Now I have to sit here and restart servers like a fucking dickhead until some user stops abusing the API Wednesday, January 30, 2013 1:22:19 PMTwitter Web Client
PRO. FUCKING. TIP: IF YOUR APP HAS AN API, RATE LIMIT IT YOU CUNTS SO PARTNERS DON'T CRASH THE SYSTEM EVERY 2.5 MINUTES Fuckin amatuer hour Wednesday, January 30, 2013 1:21:29 PMTwitter Web Client
"BURN IT ALL DOWN AND PISS ON THE ASHES" - Xtina Wednesday, January 30, 2013 10:54:24 AMTwitter Web Client
Fuck. Yes : http://t.co/jxBzWNT (PS - I'm HUGE) Wednesday, January 30, 2013 2:52:37 AMTwitter Web Client
Holy shit. He wasn't BSing me: http://t.co/haJo15t Tuesday, January 29, 2013 4:00:43 PMTwitter Web Client
"Gabe's probably got node.js running on his RC helicopter." -Joe P. Tuesday, January 29, 2013 3:48:48 PMTwitter Web Client
I like eating Christina's nuts Tuesday, January 29, 2013 1:36:55 PMTwitter Web Client
Fucking out of it... Just told the devs I don't pay attention to our chief system architect. Tuesday, January 29, 2013 9:08:54 AMTwitter Web Client
This just blew my mind: hg tip --template "{rev}({node|short})" Monday, January 28, 2013 1:14:48 PMTwitter Web Client
Alexey writes some backwards assed shit code Monday, January 28, 2013 12:36:48 PMTwitter Web Client
Tell the count if I see him on Sesame Street again, his days are numbered http://t.co/zlfpPWE Thursday, January 24, 2013 5:49:05 PMTwitter Web Client
Since when did #djbj get all hood from detroit? http://t.co/fmAvizq Thursday, January 24, 2013 11:39:22 AMTwitter Web Client
my neck might as well be a steel beam. Someone bring drugs Thursday, January 24, 2013 11:37:26 AMTwitter Web Client
Just was up working on a bunch of shit so it's all done before my scheduled sick day. Got legit stuff done like a boss #blowmebookerhookers Thursday, January 24, 2013 2:45:46 AMTwitter Web Client
SON OF A WHORE! - Xtina Wednesday, January 23, 2013 3:24:32 PMTwitter Web Client
For the love of God, Montresor! Wednesday, January 23, 2013 3:23:45 PMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu @kerbear88 Slightly guilty, but I have a actual thermometer so I get extra points.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
Wednesday, January 23, 2013 11:40:06 AMTwitter Web Client
Joe P "Joe.. This coffee is staining my soul" Tuesday, January 22, 2013 10:00:26 AMTwitter Web Client
son of a bitch. take this turntable away from me. will spend all my money on grunge records Monday, January 21, 2013 9:00:44 PMTwitter Web Client
Just remembered now that I was drunkenly speaking Spanish with our cleaning lady on Friday. Whoops Monday, January 21, 2013 1:13:40 PMTwitter Web Client
You think I'd get a fucking "thanks" for moving all that data over the weekend for these biddies Monday, January 21, 2013 10:19:59 AMTwitter Web Client
@kerbear88 no
In reply to @kerbear88's tweet
Monday, January 21, 2013 9:35:09 AMTwitter Web Client
Pockets is a weenie head Monday, January 21, 2013 9:34:51 AMTwitter Web Client
My tweets from last year were CRAY http://t.co/rQ83By8 Monday, January 21, 2013 9:21:19 AMTwitter Web Client
although work ended at 6 so fucking whatever i do now is extra and doesnt count Friday, January 18, 2013 7:12:18 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm also hammered. at work Friday, January 18, 2013 7:09:25 PMTwitter Web Client
I am listening to Ten like it's my job Friday, January 18, 2013 7:05:15 PMTwitter Web Client
My boss changed into a T-Shirt and BANG BANG #notgay Friday, January 18, 2013 7:03:23 PMTwitter Web Client
SAT IN THE VP'S CHAIR IN HIS OFFICE. felt good cunts Friday, January 18, 2013 6:45:35 PMTwitter Web Client
EVEN FLOWWWWWWWWWW THOUGHTS ARRIVE LIKE BUTTERFLIES Friday, January 18, 2013 6:44:54 PMTwitter Web Client
someone wanna queue up the lightning for tomorrow. fuckers Friday, January 18, 2013 6:33:59 PMTwitter Web Client
Will be blackout by 8PM. Guaranteed. Friday, January 18, 2013 6:29:56 PMTwitter Web Client
Just bitched to HR that they can suck my dick Friday, January 18, 2013 6:26:35 PMTwitter Web Client
Fucks given that QA is down: Less than 0 Friday, January 18, 2013 6:25:31 PMTwitter Web Client
Too drunk for this fucking build and release shit Friday, January 18, 2013 5:49:40 PMTwitter Web Client
pretty sure they poured a couple of bottles of grain into this keg. It's strong as fuck Friday, January 18, 2013 5:09:35 PMTwitter Web Client
DAT GUITAR SOLO. (Mike McCready, teach me the ways!) Friday, January 18, 2013 3:40:58 PMTwitter Web Client
I will probably jack off to pearl jam's ten spinning on my turntable. Hurry up and ship, bitches Friday, January 18, 2013 3:21:44 PMTwitter Web Client
Yo. Lemme get another beer? Friday, January 18, 2013 3:16:30 PMTwitter Web Client
Forgot my access card for the building. Lobby guy called me out for signing in as Broseph (I considered signing in as Barack Obama first) Friday, January 18, 2013 2:56:46 PMTwitter Web Client
Hughlon is my homeboy Friday, January 18, 2013 1:04:26 PMTwitter Web Client
"Sam... What's Nate's title? I just referred to him as our report dude." -@maljnew Friday, January 18, 2013 12:45:45 PMTwitter Web Client