5975 tweets posted from Twitter Web Client
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This is absolutely unheard of. I went 6/4 without tweeting .WHAAAAAAAAA. (Busy at work and having a life I guess) Wednesday, June 05, 2013 12:18:51 AMTwitter Web Client
actually agree w/ this mets ass fan RT @KFCBarstool 3h Best thing that could happen for the #Yankees is a 1,000 game suspension for #Arod Wednesday, June 05, 2013 12:17:46 AMTwitter Web Client
@MarkAbsher GETTING IT. Do you know if it will have a pure Google experience, or Sense?
In reply to @MarkAbsher's tweet
Monday, June 03, 2013 3:44:54 PMTwitter Web Client
OH MY GOD. VINE IS NOW ON ANDROID. WHY ISN'T IT IN THE PLAY STORE YET? I have sexytime animations to create Monday, June 03, 2013 9:58:24 AMTwitter Web Client
What kind of dumb bitch setups up a load balancer to round robin to one server in the pool? #hood #booker #Niraj Monday, June 03, 2013 9:57:28 AMTwitter Web Client
Murrrrrrrica kinda sucks: http://t.co/xhwAWVi3i6 Monday, June 03, 2013 12:43:03 AMTwitter Web Client
What in the actual fuck is in my eye? Legit feels like there is sand in my eyelid Sunday, June 02, 2013 6:12:44 PMTwitter Web Client
This dude Tun Tun just walked over to me to tell me he was going to Skype me, sat down, and then Skyped me #craycray Friday, May 31, 2013 4:56:58 PMTwitter Web Client
Mal: "My dress had stains on it yesterday"
Aniusha: "Were they cum stains?" 		Friday, May 31, 2013 3:20:43 PMTwitter Web Client
gassy as a bastard Friday, May 31, 2013 3:20:18 PMTwitter Web Client
It's 10:48 in the morning and the day before my birthday. It's unacceptable that the office keg was STILL not replaced. Friday, May 31, 2013 10:51:16 AMTwitter Web Client
It's bullshit that the keg is kicked on my floor and I have to trek up to 19. CEO caught me carrying 2 pitchers down the stairs #WHATEVER Thursday, May 30, 2013 6:32:33 PMTwitter Web Client
Eric is a dumb bitch Wednesday, May 29, 2013 3:55:21 PMTwitter Web Client
New Alice in Chains is kinda weak. Oh wells Wednesday, May 29, 2013 12:48:04 PMTwitter Web Client
Going to have a little listen to that new Alice in Chains album that dropped Wednesday, May 29, 2013 1:19:31 AMTwitter Web Client
TK: shut the fuck up and put your tits away. You're the nastiest. Tuesday, May 28, 2013 12:16:18 PMTwitter Web Client
@XtinaSchelin Mal got an 11!
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, May 26, 2013 2:01:52 PMTwitter Web Client
@XtinaSchelin I scored a 39. You?
In reply to @XtinaSchelin's tweet
Saturday, May 25, 2013 12:46:54 PMTwitter Web Client
Should have been a baseball player. All you have to do is be amazing for like 3 weeks and then spend the rest of your life paid on the DL Friday, May 24, 2013 11:33:09 PMTwitter Web Client
Is Granderson fuckin for real? Dude's back for like 3 minutes and breaks his finger and goes back on the DL. Friday, May 24, 2013 11:32:33 PMTwitter Web Client
Our VP of finance has the hots for me. Not sure how I feel about this since she has a son my age... Thursday, May 23, 2013 12:48:27 PMTwitter Web Client
Just received an amazing text from the gf: "I'm going to bang the bartender. she's that hot" Fine by me, as long as I'm invited @maljnew Tuesday, May 21, 2013 1:18:23 PMTwitter Web Client
Yo. I'm all about ripping ass, but putting charcol in your pants is way too far: http://t.co/VPo0xMexbp Tuesday, May 21, 2013 9:09:34 AMTwitter Web Client
@mollyCsouthern @MalJNew SUPER NOODLES!! RT @UberFacts In 2000, Japan named Instant Noodles their best invention of the 20th century. Tuesday, May 21, 2013 12:49:42 AMTwitter Web Client
Can you believe this fuckin guy legit left me on my own for this maintenance? Tuesday, May 21, 2013 12:48:30 AMTwitter Web Client
The WORST headache and reflux right now Monday, May 20, 2013 2:55:39 PMTwitter Web Client
Google hangouts in gmail is a bunch of bullshit. Fuckin product is half asssed. Monday, May 20, 2013 12:32:30 PMTwitter Web Client
Resolving bugs like a muddafucka Friday, May 17, 2013 1:24:16 PMTwitter Web Client
Holy balls... Just tried the x86 Android emulator and it's fast as shit. Thursday, May 16, 2013 5:05:57 PMTwitter Web Client
Booker: Crashy McCrasherson Thursday, May 16, 2013 3:33:07 PMTwitter Web Client
Smelly QA girl: Stop telling me when builds fail. I am alerted immediately and don't need your input. K thx Thursday, May 16, 2013 2:59:49 PMTwitter Web Client
Where the fuck is my frontend team? Thursday, May 16, 2013 2:54:29 PMTwitter Web Client
They got me a ThinkPad for work. Love me a clit mouse http://t.co/w2uUcMF0q4 (For real, It's so much better than a touchpad) Thursday, May 16, 2013 12:33:28 PMTwitter Web Client
Someone's Skype status is "I'm coming for you, BlackBerry Z10" Dude needs to re-evaluate his life... Blackberries were cool in like 2006 Thursday, May 16, 2013 9:18:15 AMTwitter Web Client
Cuncel da Hughes Wednesday, May 15, 2013 9:56:41 PMTwitter Web Client
What kind of stupid fucking Dunkin Donuts has a drink come out to 4 cents over with tax? I had to break $1 because the shit was $1.04 Wednesday, May 15, 2013 5:06:42 PMTwitter Web Client
This 55" display they got me for "system status" is going to be my dedicated office trolling, Netflix, HBO GO and Showtime Anytime TV. Duh Tuesday, May 14, 2013 12:46:07 PMTwitter Web Client
OVERHEARD at Booker... Paula, our recruiter. "I think the bigger ones are better. I want a big one" (computer displays you sick bitch) Tuesday, May 14, 2013 11:16:35 AMTwitter Web Client
@XtinaSchelin Go to bed
In reply to @XtinaSchelin's tweet
Tuesday, May 14, 2013 1:45:14 AMTwitter Web Client
The Skype (sun) smiley is the happiest thing ever Monday, May 13, 2013 5:36:49 PMTwitter Web Client
Actually sick to my stomach Monday, May 13, 2013 4:46:18 PMTwitter Web Client
DANIEL get the FUCK off my dick about the fucking display behind me. It's NOT MY JOB to set that shit up. Talk to Hughlon Monday, May 13, 2013 3:17:07 PMTwitter Web Client
Paula: "What happened with the big balls?" Hughlon: "I can't answer that, it's an HR problem." Monday, May 13, 2013 12:19:26 PMTwitter Web Client
Words cannot even begin to describe how foul I am on a Monday morning right now, even though I promised to work on my attitude/positivity Monday, May 13, 2013 9:51:10 AMTwitter Web Client
...Or I can do it booker style... Write more shit code to handle the existing shit code.... Monday, May 13, 2013 2:24:46 AMTwitter Web Client
The way I handle dates in my twitter app is 100% fuckup code. I need to rewite it. Fuckin code is worse than booker code Monday, May 13, 2013 2:15:38 AMTwitter Web Client
This actually made me laugh outloud for like 30 seconds. Yes, I know I'm unstable: http://t.co/AOOuwwiau3 Friday, May 10, 2013 11:27:00 AMTwitter Web Client
Watching our VP of Finance trying to use a NERF gun is something special... Friday, May 10, 2013 9:23:42 AMTwitter Web Client
#booker: This will be me from now on: http://t.co/1ktWT9i5E8 Thursday, May 09, 2013 9:47:41 AMTwitter Web Client
Looking back at yesterday's tweets, I was fuckin off the wall. I'm chill today. Let's keep it like that. It's better for everyone Thursday, May 09, 2013 9:39:57 AMTwitter Web Client
Thank you barstool for that face down ass up article that popped into my newsfeed as my boss walked over... thanks Thursday, May 09, 2013 9:37:47 AMTwitter Web Client
gotta admit. jeans is a fuckin sweet god damn talker. I was nervous as fuck to go in there and i ended up chill Wednesday, May 08, 2013 6:04:27 PMTwitter Web Client
ANXIETY IS MAD HIGH AGAIN Wednesday, May 08, 2013 5:18:13 PMTwitter Web Client
I'd tell this guy to eat a dick for making me downgrade redis, but he'd like it. so he should lick a box instead Wednesday, May 08, 2013 4:30:00 PMTwitter Web Client
fuck xanax. couple of beers do the same thing Wednesday, May 08, 2013 3:20:51 PMTwitter Web Client
Whoever's ass is bending down loading dishes into the dishwasher, please stop before Mal yells at me for staring. Wednesday, May 08, 2013 3:12:34 PMTwitter Web Client
If they keep up this shit over here, I'm gonna end up worse than Bynes #booker Wednesday, May 08, 2013 1:29:27 PMTwitter Web Client
Hughlon is a wonderful man Wednesday, May 08, 2013 1:00:43 PMTwitter Web Client
Nervous breakdown starts now Wednesday, May 08, 2013 12:37:42 PMTwitter Web Client
Hobbs is already trying to fuck the new project managers. They've been here 5 minutes Wednesday, May 08, 2013 10:46:27 AMTwitter Web Client
@__JLu I was just thinking that.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
Wednesday, May 08, 2013 10:45:32 AMTwitter Web Client
I'm gonna lose my fucking shit. I've been running this bitch MY WAY for 2 years and this guy comes in and wants to switch it all up. Wednesday, May 08, 2013 10:39:20 AMTwitter Web Client
Which one of you motherfuckers up in sales can get me a xanax? Wednesday, May 08, 2013 9:10:37 AMTwitter Web Client
CHILL SON. MY SHIT TAKES VALID ARGUMENTS http://t.co/Uox5lhg2AG Tuesday, May 07, 2013 12:32:27 PMTwitter Web Client
@lennon One year ago today, in response to last year's 4th de mayo party: https://t.co/63RrjDADxp Tuesday, May 07, 2013 10:22:26 AMTwitter Web Client
Can't wait to get lung cancer from the WTC dust that's in my building's ventilation system. Ever since I moved here, I sneeze like a mother Tuesday, May 07, 2013 10:18:27 AMTwitter Web Client
Syskill: "for real, there are more cocks than tits upstairs." Monday, May 06, 2013 6:11:26 PMTwitter Web Client
Brain is SO fried I just wrote this rambling sentence: "we're all shot all day tomorrow it's the tech meeting and brent all day" Monday, May 06, 2013 6:08:34 PMTwitter Web Client
The front end team needs to shut the fuck up, those loud bastards Monday, May 06, 2013 3:47:51 PMTwitter Web Client
OMG these peppers and egg sangwiches are bawhss Monday, May 06, 2013 12:24:35 PMTwitter Web Client
Yes, you can put my report in your folder anytime you want. Monday, May 06, 2013 11:56:56 AMTwitter Web Client
I am the gassiest. And I have 2 Mexican/drinking parties este fin de semana. What's the over/under I end up shitting myself? Friday, May 03, 2013 4:18:19 PMTwitter Web Client
@MalJNew the QA intern who's trying to bang Polina
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
Friday, May 03, 2013 1:16:19 PMTwitter Web Client
Actual Hughlon quote on Skype: "Please tell this fuking guy to shut the fuk up over here" Friday, May 03, 2013 11:28:59 AMTwitter Web Client
Not sure what's fucked up more... Bynes or the build success rate for QA Friday, May 03, 2013 10:11:17 AMTwitter Web Client
Hughlon is a God Damn Baller Friday, May 03, 2013 9:41:50 AMTwitter Web Client
There is NO way I fit into this small assed t shirt.. Thursday, May 02, 2013 5:02:30 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm fat Thursday, May 02, 2013 11:08:36 AMTwitter Web Client
New work meme: #eltres
(for the Tres de Mayo shitshow) 		Tuesday, April 30, 2013 5:40:52 PMTwitter Web Client
My FTP server legit doesn't give a fuck. It just returned: 200 Don't care http://t.co/nVFVvrAUzJ Tuesday, April 30, 2013 4:02:04 PMTwitter Web Client
Observation: That batshit CE girl must not be all hopped up on coke anymore because she's been reallllll low-keyed lately Tuesday, April 30, 2013 3:08:35 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm getting my interns confused... Because they are dudes and not relevant to my interests. Tuesday, April 30, 2013 2:55:44 PMTwitter Web Client
I'm a metrotextual: http://t.co/cEeSaOUQVi Tuesday, April 30, 2013 2:42:07 PMTwitter Web Client
Gonna add full text search to my twitter app instead of a %like% match. I was sick of assist coming up when I searched for ass Tuesday, April 30, 2013 12:40:28 PMTwitter Web Client
...and that was a weekend. Jesus Monday, April 29, 2013 9:45:26 AMTwitter Web Client
Might actually cunt punt Grace for being an absolute wise cracking bitch ass. Go off on her Joe Pesce style, like Spider in Goodfellas Friday, April 26, 2013 3:51:32 PMTwitter Web Client
Not pleased that my fountain soda is empty Friday, April 26, 2013 9:28:03 AMTwitter Web Client
Am I the only one who thinks the Starbucks logo chick looks like she could be a freak in bed? Thursday, April 25, 2013 4:27:59 PMTwitter Web Client
be like " yo lemmie get liek mad skrillaz k thx got bills and shit to pay, word?' Thursday, April 25, 2013 11:25:08 AMTwitter Web Client
Mike McCready is an absolute beast. Come over immediately and play me guitar. Thursday, April 25, 2013 1:46:40 AMTwitter Web Client
Pearl Jam's show at State College PA in 2003 is giving me the most goosebumps right now. Thursday, April 25, 2013 1:37:06 AMTwitter Web Client
I want a puppy Thursday, April 25, 2013 12:39:06 AMTwitter Web Client
Jeff stop whining Wednesday, April 24, 2013 11:49:19 AMTwitter Web Client
COO told me to leave a good review for our Android App. I said do it once it didn't suck. Wednesday, April 24, 2013 11:30:39 AMTwitter Web Client
The most ridiculous video you'll see of me and the Ecuadorians doing Jagerbombs junior year: http://t.co/ym4ZtXNDNz Wednesday, April 24, 2013 1:51:00 AMTwitter Web Client
Fuck CentOS. The packages are god damn antiques. Fuckin shit shipping from 2009. I need Ubuntu Server back Tuesday, April 23, 2013 9:24:04 PMTwitter Web Client
Fucking Apache and CentOS. Not used to this shit. Used to Ubuntu and Lighttpd/Nginx Tuesday, April 23, 2013 8:33:14 PMTwitter Web Client
IIS + PHP = ASS (use linux with php) #bitches Tuesday, April 23, 2013 5:12:09 PMTwitter Web Client
Niraj: "Bring the sexy back" Tuesday, April 23, 2013 4:59:26 PMTwitter Web Client
@XtinaSchelin Fuck Firefox
In reply to @XtinaSchelin's tweet
Tuesday, April 23, 2013 10:05:00 AMTwitter Web Client