9538 tweets posted from Twitter for Android
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| Tweet | Date | Source |
|---|---|---|
| I can't believe I didn't get sausage and peppers. The fucking Mets and CutiField are dead to me | Wednesday, June 15, 2016 9:54:12 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @CitiField bring me sausage and peppers assholes | Wednesday, June 15, 2016 9:49:18 PM | Twitter for Android |
| So mad at CutiField right now. #sausageandpeppersyoufuckincunts | Wednesday, June 15, 2016 9:45:20 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Yo @CitiField you stupid cunts. How do you stop selling sausage and peppers in the 8th? Now I have to eat this shitty hot dog | Wednesday, June 15, 2016 9:42:37 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @keegs141 walking there so fast you're skipping words | Wednesday, June 15, 2016 7:50:10 PM | Twitter for Android |
| #thefuckingsubway | Wednesday, June 15, 2016 6:29:56 PM | Twitter for Android |
| IT guy was being a douchenozzle so I boosted his keyboard. https://t.co/v8jSYueedG | Tuesday, June 14, 2016 4:07:23 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @MalJNew ⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡ hhhhhhhhh | Sunday, June 12, 2016 1:16:38 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Drunk and hungry AF for steak | Saturday, June 11, 2016 8:13:15 PM | Twitter for Android |
| See?! Jeebus larvs me. He said so himself. And he only loves some. https://t.co/9KLZs0YUIc | Saturday, June 11, 2016 8:12:00 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @JesusLovesSome I love you Jesus In reply to @JesusLovesSome's tweet | Saturday, June 11, 2016 7:50:15 PM | Twitter for Android |
| RT @JesusLovesSome: @portfolioso Pretty old, I'd say. Older than I ever lived. | Saturday, June 11, 2016 7:28:05 PM | Twitter for Android |
| #Wildwood2016: cougar grannies #lol | Saturday, June 11, 2016 7:07:59 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Jesus Christ. How old am I getting that I'm hanging out with three cougar grannies and I'm actually having a good time. | Saturday, June 11, 2016 7:06:44 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I mean.... we'd much rather bang Emma Stone, but these cougars https://t.co/V7uTnJaBun to chill with In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Saturday, June 11, 2016 6:56:17 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Mal and I are obsessed with these cougar grannies at the pool #jussayin | Saturday, June 11, 2016 6:17:26 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I've got no business wearing sunglasses anymore but fuck it | Friday, June 10, 2016 8:38:56 PM | Twitter for Android |
| When I tweeted my last tweet, I was originally worried about what the fan/ @JkBarr55 would think, but he's a G so I knew it was fine. In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Friday, June 10, 2016 8:09:27 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Mal just said it was cool if we had a threesome with Emma Stone so my life is complete | Friday, June 10, 2016 7:59:12 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Fist pumpin down the Garden State past Asbury Park blasting some Bruce. #sojerseyrightnow | Wednesday, June 08, 2016 8:20:30 PM | Twitter for Android |
| #trees #killers #GovBallNYC #youredoinggreat https://t.co/BhTEX9VzgE | Saturday, June 04, 2016 10:03:15 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I want a cheesesteak | Friday, June 03, 2016 6:57:05 PM | Twitter for Android |
| You mean to tell me I can type anything and it'll show here? #GovBallNYC #youredoinggreat | Friday, June 03, 2016 3:42:33 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Some pair of balls to run your meeting 45 minutes over | Thursday, June 02, 2016 4:31:11 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Cause' that's what a mothafuckin monsta do | Tuesday, May 31, 2016 12:07:24 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Lol Coldplay clocks. #sogoodtho | Monday, May 30, 2016 11:53:56 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Status: walking to a bar with a slice of NYC pizza in my hand | Monday, May 30, 2016 10:38:54 PM | Twitter for Android |
| The Yankees suck a cock and I've taken up drinking too much the past few days | Monday, May 30, 2016 9:11:52 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @__JLu used to use tabs. Now I use spaces. When you have something like Python that bitches about spacing, you get used to it | Monday, May 30, 2016 3:51:23 PM | Twitter for Android |
| My tweets don't even make sense tonight. Jesus Christ. | Monday, May 30, 2016 2:39:33 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Pretty sure my Lyft guy tonight was on coke listening in to techno in a euro clurb. | Monday, May 30, 2016 2:38:55 AM | Twitter for Android |
| My phone actually auto-tweeted a bunch of gibberish. Dafek In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Monday, May 30, 2016 2:08:32 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Dem crackers twerkin https://t.co/KnloCSnobe | Monday, May 30, 2016 1:52:52 AM | Twitter for Android |
| May I know that I can get a chance to see the attached file | Monday, May 30, 2016 1:20:09 AM | Twitter for Android |
| #lolmets that this Queens bar has Dodgers fans in it than Mets fans | Monday, May 30, 2016 12:42:07 AM | Twitter for Android |
| 12 Dodgizz fans just walked into a bar in Queens. Wut? | Monday, May 30, 2016 12:38:38 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Xanaxxanaxxanaxxanaxxanaxxanaxxanax | Friday, May 27, 2016 11:09:14 PM | Twitter for Android |
| My Bella 😭😭😭😭😭😭😥😥😥😥😖😖😖😖😖😖😟😞😟😞😢😭😦😧 | Friday, May 27, 2016 10:36:49 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Happy Friyay | Friday, May 27, 2016 8:44:27 AM | Twitter for Android |
| #thefuckingsubway | Thursday, May 26, 2016 9:30:24 AM | Twitter for Android |
| RT @PeruvianPrncs: Help! What's a filter on Snapchat? How do I engage our clients on it? #oldmillenial #pdxdms | Thursday, May 26, 2016 12:32:20 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Ima bang this NY pizza | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 11:45:57 PM | Twitter for Android |
| This pizza's fleek. Did I say that right? #oldmillenial | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 11:44:36 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Vinny " sir. Can we put the can in reverse please?" | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 11:01:05 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I hang out with such hot guys, they get hit on by HOTTTT girls sleeping and drooling out the front of a cab | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 11:00:35 PM | Twitter for Android |
| This Asian slut is all about Young Mark's chest hair. #jussayin | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 10:45:22 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I keep stealing Pat's beer | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 10:44:03 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Yo @YouTube. Way to send me a YouTube red marketing email when I'm already a subscriber via @GooglePlayMusic dunce | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 10:39:57 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Is there any way to see what I just Snapchated? Because I'm pretty sure I won't remember this in the am or 5 mins from now... #oldmillenial | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 10:36:37 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I don't understand how the Snapchat works. #oldmillenial | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 10:25:58 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I knew I was gonna be this sloppy. Called it this morning. Rarely party, but I can call it when I sense I'm gonna go nuts | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 10:25:21 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I just tried to photo bomb a Snapchat and got crossed out before being sent. Little #butthurt | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 10:23:26 PM | Twitter for Android |
| All the hoes jockin Alina and Pat cockblockin' | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 10:01:48 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Fuck you too bitch call the cops | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 9:53:29 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Yo @twitter. Fix the bug in your Android app where scrolling through multiple pics in one tweet lags the shit out of my phone | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 9:26:34 PM | Twitter for Android |
| #boss #drake https://t.co/twJlPz0F2w | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 9:21:48 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @BarstoolJJ Tex hit a home run, didn't he? In reply to @BarstoolJJ's tweet | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 9:13:22 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Just had my 4th mixed drink at the standard... I guess I'll need to take out a loan soon | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 9:06:20 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Dumb motherfuckers. Why would you EVER run SQL profiler in production. For fuck's sake. | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 11:09:19 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Now one of my socks is inside out... I'm a hot mess. | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 9:37:00 AM | Twitter for Android |
| This is gonna sound absolutely absurd, but I can explain. I think I left my sunglasses in the work fridge yesterday...😎 | Wednesday, May 25, 2016 8:41:57 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Yanks are back. Going all the way to the series #positivenancy | Tuesday, May 24, 2016 9:25:41 PM | Twitter for Android |
| She literally doesn't understand the concept of copying the image and pasting it into the text field | Tuesday, May 24, 2016 8:32:13 PM | Twitter for Android |
| "What's NSFW?" "Not safe for work, ma" "What does not safe for work mean?" 😂 | Tuesday, May 24, 2016 8:31:27 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I'm on the phone trying to teach my mom how to send Bitmoji and she's taking 10 minutes to pick one... | Tuesday, May 24, 2016 8:27:15 PM | Twitter for Android |
| These Bloomberg/JP Morgan suit randons need to stop conversing this early on this plane | Monday, May 23, 2016 7:58:52 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @Delta Changed gates to one with no computer or way to scan tickets. Smart. | Monday, May 23, 2016 7:16:56 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @Delta F- service in Columbus. 4 gate changes. There's one gate attendant serving 3 gates and one bad part delayed all other flights | Monday, May 23, 2016 7:15:24 AM | Twitter for Android |
| On this day in 2010, we were wreaking havoc on CNS wire closets. This is what they get for not locking them up... https://t.co/obqfo1bgXs | Sunday, May 22, 2016 10:31:44 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Always nice to see "Encryption state: off" on your local CC point of sale terminal https://t.co/jB288DJnf0 | Sunday, May 22, 2016 12:38:44 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I think Ohio University just banned me from their guest wifi. I didn't even do anything. Come on. | Saturday, May 21, 2016 2:17:58 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Son of a bitch https://t.co/6PlodUTe2C | Friday, May 20, 2016 3:42:46 PM | Twitter for Android |
| This bird just shit on @MalJNew's arm https://t.co/Iz0VFouydA | Friday, May 20, 2016 3:32:45 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @__JLu used to piss off @MalJNew by saying that over and over randomly throughout the day (with accent). Thanks for the reminder | Monday, May 16, 2016 5:42:20 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I want a Big Mac | Sunday, May 15, 2016 9:20:16 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Please replace @RealMichaelKay on Yes full time https://t.co/pdLUv4qvLS | Sunday, May 15, 2016 8:48:09 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Woof | Sunday, May 15, 2016 8:46:49 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I'm a disgusting asshole and I can't even tweet it it was so gross | Saturday, May 14, 2016 1:32:42 AM | Twitter for Android |
| My friends just described Not Your Father's Root beer in the most vile, degenerate way and Young Mark's still sleeping | Saturday, May 14, 2016 1:31:43 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Freddy's taking selfies with the ladies | Saturday, May 14, 2016 1:25:44 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Ahhh sheeeeit. Kevin Rose just shook a bitch https://t.co/gvpKky5YjE | Saturday, May 14, 2016 1:23:14 AM | Twitter for Android |
| The Yankees suck so bad, the NY bars even turn them off for Mets and basketball | Friday, May 13, 2016 9:11:57 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I didn't mean to, but I'm getting hammered for this show | Monday, May 09, 2016 8:38:15 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Happy Monday, cunts #thefuckingsubway | Monday, May 09, 2016 9:24:10 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @NYCTSubway you're making announcements about the 7 line which is irrelevant and not about how the M/R has delays In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Monday, May 09, 2016 9:23:49 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @NYCTSubway there have been 0 manh bound R trains at 46th in the past 20 minutes | Monday, May 09, 2016 9:18:11 AM | Twitter for Android |
| I really need to stop saying that our codebase sucks a dick around my gay work friends. | Friday, May 06, 2016 8:15:38 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I'm sure all 231 people at Yankee Stadium right now are thrilled to be sitting in the rain losing in the 1st inning. | Friday, May 06, 2016 7:30:40 PM | Twitter for Android |
| This bathroom smells like sex and vomit | Wednesday, May 04, 2016 11:06:37 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Meredith Merakovits is pretty rough looking @YESNetwork | Wednesday, May 04, 2016 10:38:31 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Would be nice if my fuckin key worked in the fuckin lock. #raisetherenttho. Get me the fuck out of this cess pool city | Wednesday, May 04, 2016 1:25:16 AM | Twitter for Android |
| I genuinely wonder how much better the world would be if everyone would just think for themselves instead of worrying about judgment. | Wednesday, May 04, 2016 1:21:01 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Protip in life: If you don't like who the fuck I am, go fuck yourself | Wednesday, May 04, 2016 1:18:02 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Cuncel da @Yankees cya in 2017 | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 11:15:41 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I'm a negative asshole that no one likes! | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 9:13:06 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I was drunk twice today and didn't get hungover either time! #score | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 8:20:23 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @BadPointer their shows were Sunday and Monday lol. In reply to @BadPointer's tweet | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 8:19:35 PM | Twitter for Android |
| RT @sadserver: the pids aren't alright | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 8:16:49 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @ky9 yes it does | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 8:14:33 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @RockNationRadio I was being force-fed vodka at a Russian place and saw an Eddie Vedder doppelgänger, so my B In reply to @RockNationRadio's tweet | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 3:25:11 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @RockNationRadio ah shit I thought they had two nights at the garden In reply to @RockNationRadio's tweet | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 3:23:33 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I'd do pretty gay things for 2 Pearl Jam tickets at the garden later. #jussayin | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 3:05:49 PM | Twitter for Android |
| This Russian restaurant/ bath house combo smells like weed | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 2:59:56 PM | Twitter for Android |
| The Russians took us out for lunch... ....annnd I'm hammered | Tuesday, May 03, 2016 2:30:14 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Performers should be forcibly ejected if they stay in the same car for more than one stop #TheFuckingSubway | Monday, May 02, 2016 6:40:21 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Feels like a dreary October day | Sunday, May 01, 2016 2:24:25 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @ky9 @Mets Pepsi's better but it's all about who pays more | Sunday, May 01, 2016 1:32:47 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Cabbie is driving like an absolute savage | Saturday, April 30, 2016 11:25:44 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Cuncel da Yankees | Saturday, April 30, 2016 8:22:17 PM | Twitter for Android |
| BX --> BK | Saturday, April 30, 2016 8:18:29 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Suits suck In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Saturday, April 30, 2016 6:12:49 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @__JLu fuck all those suits | Saturday, April 30, 2016 6:08:58 PM | Twitter for Android |
| This fat fuck had a sausage and peppers (not hot dogs, @__JLu ) AND a cheese steak at Yankee Stadium today. #nom | Saturday, April 30, 2016 5:52:15 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Protip: The South Bronx is pretty rough | Saturday, April 30, 2016 3:21:56 PM | Twitter for Android |
| This train's slower than Ted Cruz #TheFuckingSubway | Thursday, April 28, 2016 11:13:57 PM | Twitter for Android |
| We've let two "express" trains pass us on the local track. I'm sure the guy running this train has his thumb in his ass #TheFuckingSubway | Thursday, April 28, 2016 11:07:40 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I don't understand how this train has been parked in a tunnel for 5 minutes. It's 11PM. What train traffic? #TheFuckingSubway | Thursday, April 28, 2016 11:03:48 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I may or may not have burned my face on a taquito | Thursday, April 28, 2016 3:18:14 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Damn auto inserting tracking hashtags from my app I forgot to delete. In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Thursday, April 28, 2016 2:33:33 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Donald Trump: Make America... Not be like Venezuela (hopefully) https://t.co/6Dj1rzdS1d #entertainment #feedly | Thursday, April 28, 2016 2:31:50 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Because I'm a nostalgic degenerate, just ordered a Bud Light bottle at the bar because it reminded me of the Grape | Thursday, April 28, 2016 2:06:28 AM | Twitter for Android |
| The NYC subway is so bad, my hashtag #thefuckingsubway crashes my Twitter app on Android. | Tuesday, April 26, 2016 9:09:05 AM | Twitter for Android |
| All of the presidential candidates are brain damaged; one worse than the other. | Tuesday, April 26, 2016 9:06:04 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Greg Kelly basically just suggested everyone should fuck in the back seat of driverless cars while they're driving you. | Tuesday, April 26, 2016 8:41:49 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Someone's gotta move this bumblefuck train a little faster. Guys going like 10mph the whole way #thefuckingsubway | Monday, April 25, 2016 9:07:04 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Happy Monday! #YOLO https://t.co/jf6AdbCOKn | Monday, April 25, 2016 9:12:12 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @TWC_Help all good. A reboot of the modem solved it | Saturday, April 23, 2016 12:23:58 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Love how @TWC_NYNJ shits the bed and the whole internet breaks when one device backs up to iCloud at max upload bandwidth (a blazing 5mbps) | Saturday, April 23, 2016 12:04:58 AM | Twitter for Android |
| These crackers just SQL injection shut down my SQL server #assholes #parameterize | Wednesday, April 20, 2016 2:53:41 PM | Twitter for Android |
| It's 7am and the keg just tempted me.... | Monday, April 18, 2016 7:01:44 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Some motherfucker smells like mildew and B.O. #thefuckingsubway | Monday, April 18, 2016 6:16:39 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Some Technotronic came on my Google Music on this early assed train ride and now it's like like the clurb up in this bitch | Monday, April 18, 2016 5:46:22 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Trains always show up back to back to back... In the other direction. Meanwhile, I've been here like an asshole forever. #thefuckingsubway | Friday, April 15, 2016 9:45:52 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Love how the entire subway bench is open and this kid decides to sit right on top of my asshole #thefuckingsubway | Friday, April 15, 2016 9:32:55 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I mean... I don't know anything about it... | Thursday, April 14, 2016 9:41:20 PM | Twitter for Android |
| And the feds busted the stream. Lolz | Thursday, April 14, 2016 9:40:18 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I don't watch illegal streams, but if I had to guess what's on at commercial breaks: acid trip frogs to Da Rude Sandstorm. #truestorybro | Thursday, April 14, 2016 9:38:12 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Illegal streams: "********If you work for NHL, Do not read under the line**********" #SeemsLegit https://t.co/SEOESZUoj3 | Thursday, April 14, 2016 9:23:35 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Problem, Officer? https://t.co/g2cNij2gZW | Thursday, April 14, 2016 8:05:37 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @scoopandslam LGA and JFK are the most third world assed airports I've ever been to In reply to @scoopandslam's tweet | Thursday, April 14, 2016 7:35:08 PM | Twitter for Android |
| CC: @XtinaSchelin https://t.co/ru4T66Iz4Y | Thursday, April 14, 2016 7:15:10 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Hey look! Time Warner did something right for once. https://t.co/bENGZ8bQ5E | Thursday, April 14, 2016 7:10:04 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Emilio's Big Guys coming in real hot this week in Wazabi, ya fuckin cunts #worldseriesbound | Monday, April 11, 2016 12:34:44 AM | Twitter for Android |
| You can keep Grand Central. Get me outta here. There are too many motherfuckers crowding up the place | Sunday, April 10, 2016 1:43:22 PM | Twitter for Android |
| If your emails have "Sent from my Verizon, Samsung Galaxy smartphone" in their footer, you should just quit the internet | Sunday, April 10, 2016 9:30:41 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Dope: All the White people at Coachella really just want Lily. | Sunday, April 10, 2016 1:42:29 AM | Twitter for Android |
| "I've never smashed a girl with bad phalanges" -Edgar | Friday, April 08, 2016 8:42:56 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @MalJNew Bruceeeeeeee! | Friday, April 08, 2016 7:20:24 PM | Twitter for Android |
| According to one of our employees: "The goal is the hole" | Thursday, April 07, 2016 9:36:25 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Jesus Christ, Dellin | Tuesday, April 05, 2016 3:43:08 PM | Twitter for Android |
| https://t.co/gZK2Vkri3Z | Monday, April 04, 2016 12:14:46 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @MalJNew just thought a movie from 1997 was 10 years old... We are officially old AF | Saturday, April 02, 2016 2:36:18 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Especially Ja Rule and Ashanti | Friday, April 01, 2016 1:30:51 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Got that Ja Rule on. Life's good. | Friday, April 01, 2016 1:29:23 AM | Twitter for Android |
| I see the war on drugs is going swimmingly! #Murica https://t.co/e4ZGo68Ixs | Thursday, March 31, 2016 7:16:16 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Literally taking the Browns to the Superbowl with this food poisoning I caught from the Cleveland airport. | Tuesday, March 29, 2016 12:37:42 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I appreciate how Ahmed had to check my baggage claim ticket before letting me leave LaGuardia with my bags #highsecurity #OnlyInNewYork | Monday, March 28, 2016 10:18:36 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I appreciate how Ahmed had to check my baggage claim ticket before letting me leave LaGuardia with my bags #highsecurity #OnlyOnNewYork | Monday, March 28, 2016 10:12:59 PM | Twitter for Android |
| New York City, home of the third world airports. Why would the baggage claim screens show us anything useful https://t.co/AEP6LtBhJb | Monday, March 28, 2016 10:03:47 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Designers of high quality passenger safety briefing cards and safety information placards. https://t.co/Dq4CVpun9x | Monday, March 28, 2016 8:09:25 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Stupid Twitter. Why can't I quote a tweet with an article and put a YouTube link in? I was trying to make fun of the Mets | Monday, March 28, 2016 5:31:54 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Need Dexter Morgan to find the evidence and eliminate this guy (if there's evidence) https://t.co/2TeOPveI5Q | Monday, March 28, 2016 2:37:21 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @RockNationRadio but what ever happened with Guns N Roses and bringing Slash back? In reply to @RockNationRadio's tweet | Monday, March 28, 2016 12:33:35 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Happy Easter 🐇🐣 https://t.co/UyhpEXNkKo | Sunday, March 27, 2016 10:34:04 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Always end up going first in Cards Against Humanity because I poop a lot. | Saturday, March 26, 2016 10:56:32 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Rather that using a REST client on Android to check in privately w/ Swarm's API, I just made a dashboard for myself in php. #winning | Saturday, March 26, 2016 3:31:13 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Absolutely hate it when bots like my tweets 1.5 seconds after I tweet them | Saturday, March 26, 2016 12:02:40 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Absolute horseshit that these morons are comparing Windows 10 to Vista. Win 10 is a very solid OS: https://t.co/x6rdoVze7n | Saturday, March 26, 2016 11:59:45 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @swarmapp was fixed in an update. Thanks | Saturday, March 26, 2016 11:04:05 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @swarmapp New profile page crashes on my Moto X Pure (Android 6.0), even after clearing all app data. | Thursday, March 24, 2016 4:39:11 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Flight attendant has the face of a good voice actress. @MalJNew is very observant | Thursday, March 24, 2016 1:14:35 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Twitter is 10 years old. My second tweet ever back in July 08 is about sausage and peppers. Go figure | Monday, March 21, 2016 10:14:08 PM | Twitter for Android |
| This gif describes my VP comparing my dudes hair to college basketball players https://t.co/Lj1z2vKCmW | Monday, March 21, 2016 8:07:22 PM | Twitter for Android |
| This client dinner's amazing. I got my degenerate boss buying Patron shots and we're all making fun of the VP on the other side of the table | Monday, March 21, 2016 7:53:25 PM | Twitter for Android |
| ❄❄Snow is in the air. I can smell it. ❄❄ | Saturday, March 19, 2016 3:31:21 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Pay all this money for my fuckin key to break in the god damn lock. Get me the fuck out of here In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Friday, March 18, 2016 9:50:07 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I can feed all of fuckin Uganda with how much I pay in rent in this cess pool. Landlord hasn't changed the piece of shit lock since 1970 | Friday, March 18, 2016 9:49:14 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Sausage and peppers, cunts https://t.co/ZYD1Rouwsc | Friday, March 18, 2016 8:40:40 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Protip/TMI: Don't eat red chili pepper flakes the day after a juice cleanse. With no solid food, it'll burn all the way through... | Thursday, March 17, 2016 8:01:07 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @scoopandslam of awl da dramatic things! In reply to @scoopandslam's tweet | Thursday, March 17, 2016 4:49:22 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Their new stuff is really good, but the style is so different. I feel like rock music is getting fake and more electronic lately In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Thursday, March 17, 2016 4:44:54 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Legit question on corporate IT goals: "Will our upgraded WiFi solution reach the men's bathroom?" | Thursday, March 17, 2016 12:52:27 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Robert De Niro fucks with his socks on which is both psychotic and awesome at the same time. | Saturday, March 12, 2016 3:38:19 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Hot as balls on this R #thefuckingsubway | Thursday, March 10, 2016 9:04:41 AM | Twitter for Android |
| If you're having build problems I feel bad for you son... Fuck you for making me leave the bar | Wednesday, March 09, 2016 9:32:20 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Freddy's goin to the strip club tonight | Wednesday, March 09, 2016 9:22:38 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @ky9 couldn't stop myself from doing it | Wednesday, March 09, 2016 8:54:02 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @ky9 Yanks are winning #28 this year. | Wednesday, March 09, 2016 8:29:33 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Gave a dev access to our prod corporate website because our ex engineer maintained it like shit and I couldn't be bothered. Do I worry? | Tuesday, March 08, 2016 12:21:37 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Dafuq is this teenager doing at this bar fin? | Tuesday, March 08, 2016 12:14:07 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Fin, ou really shouldn't be quoting Kanye to your boss: "You should be honored by my lateness. That I would even show up to this fake shit." | Tuesday, March 08, 2016 12:09:03 AM | Twitter for Android |
| There would be a touristy group of Asians fingering the Wall St Bull's asshole. #typical | Monday, March 07, 2016 12:01:58 PM | Twitter for Android |
| It smells like asshole in here. #thefuckingsubway | Sunday, March 06, 2016 1:39:03 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Need a bio suit in here. I'm afraid to come into contact with anything. | Sunday, March 06, 2016 1:31:55 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I don't understand how a bum can be so homeless that the stench of shit has diffused evenly throughout an entire subway car. | Sunday, March 06, 2016 1:28:21 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Damnnnnnnnn https://t.co/vfimnCXSK0 cc @MalJNew | Saturday, March 05, 2016 6:26:50 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Can't believe they knocked old majestic Penn Station down to build this shithole | Friday, March 04, 2016 10:44:53 PM | Twitter for Android |
| At @YandTRocks with @RockNationRadio. Ain't no one playing guitar like these crackers anymore. So badass And I'm not even an 80s metal head | Friday, March 04, 2016 9:01:34 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Happy Leap Day. More importantly, Happy Birthday Ja Rule. | Monday, February 29, 2016 8:42:03 AM | Twitter for Android |
| What's a better Karaoke/Rap name for Freddy? | Friday, February 26, 2016 11:32:06 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @RMerlinDev Awesome. I'm assuming they're targeting their latest models. Any love for the RT68? In reply to @RMerlinDev's tweet | Friday, February 26, 2016 5:56:57 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I wouldn't attempt to operate heavy machinery right now | Friday, February 26, 2016 8:27:59 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Probably still drunk | Friday, February 26, 2016 8:20:19 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Vinny's a savage | Friday, February 26, 2016 1:21:56 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records; Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too! | Friday, February 26, 2016 12:43:20 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Crackers are doing the Killers at karaoke and I'm SO excited for Gov Ball | Thursday, February 25, 2016 9:42:25 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Rootin for Freddy to fingerblast the Russian | Thursday, February 25, 2016 9:28:00 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Actual Freddy quote from the bar: "Man, I can't wait to fingerblast someone tonight" | Thursday, February 25, 2016 2:55:28 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Someone's gotta clean their shitty asshole on this R train. | Wednesday, February 24, 2016 6:32:23 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Goddammit. Drinking doesn't work anymore. | Tuesday, February 23, 2016 11:59:23 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Sorry. Went to White Castle in Manhattan and it wasn't that great. It only tasted great in the hood. Gotta go to Yonkers or the Bronx duh. | Tuesday, February 23, 2016 9:52:58 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @NYCTSubway why is the uptown R traveling at reduced speed but the site says good service? At 42nd st | Monday, February 22, 2016 6:28:05 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Something's not right. It's the same temperature in February in New York and Bermuda... | Saturday, February 20, 2016 4:50:24 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Pretty sure someone shit elevator #12 in this building | Friday, February 19, 2016 3:33:47 PM | Twitter for Android |
| TRUTH: https://t.co/1oPcd4JR55 | Wednesday, February 17, 2016 11:06:29 PM | Twitter for Android |
| 2nd, Bobby Cannavale is an absolute G and the perfect person to play a cray | Sunday, February 14, 2016 8:53:40 PM | Twitter for Android |
| So pumped for Vinyl you guys. I don't even think you understand how awesome a Scorsese/Mick Jagger produced 70s music scene show will be. | Sunday, February 14, 2016 8:51:56 PM | Twitter for Android |
| #thefuckingsubway | Friday, February 12, 2016 9:39:26 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @NYCTSubway three M trains in a row. Are you serious? In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Friday, February 12, 2016 9:37:54 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @NYCTSubway morning R service is infuriating and its way overcrowded. Someone needs to figure it out | Friday, February 12, 2016 9:32:42 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @NYCTSubway why no Manh bound R trains at 46th st in Queens? 2 Ms in a row and like 5 trains queensbound passed. | Friday, February 12, 2016 9:31:36 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Ureña's fucking the support girl tonight | Thursday, February 04, 2016 7:07:31 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I mean, I drank a lot.... But that doesn't count In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Thursday, February 04, 2016 5:51:30 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Win 10 lock screen backgrounds change all the time. Got this one and was like wtf am I on drugs or something? https://t.co/5ZlbUtuZ0f | Thursday, February 04, 2016 5:49:38 PM | Twitter for Android |
| You know you're in NY when your cabbie gets out and starts kicking the shit outta the car in front of you In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Wednesday, February 03, 2016 12:27:50 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Turn the heat off up in this bitch #thefuckingsubway | Monday, February 01, 2016 9:22:32 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @__JLu true but fuck them and their fees. Had no clue 2 MSG shows would sell out in 10 mins.... | Saturday, January 30, 2016 1:44:40 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Society is bullshit and almost everything is a disappointment. Good night. | Saturday, January 30, 2016 1:39:47 AM | Twitter for Android |
| You think they'd hold a handful aside for locals to buy | Saturday, January 30, 2016 1:39:28 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Get to sleep in tomorrow instead of going to the garden to buy Pearl Jam tickets because Ticketmaster would rather sell them to robots | Saturday, January 30, 2016 1:35:44 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Rrrrrlocallllll36thizzznext https://t.co/Z2qRAde6EP | Thursday, January 28, 2016 9:11:52 PM | Twitter for Android |
| R train conductor is shitfaced. Dat slurred speech doe. https://t.co/YXILzDegra | Thursday, January 28, 2016 9:11:21 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @NYCTSubway every morning around this time Manhattan bound R trains take forever show up at 46th st in Queens. | Thursday, January 28, 2016 8:47:15 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @NYCTSubway and the one after 8:39? In reply to @NYCTSubway's tweet | Wednesday, January 27, 2016 9:32:03 AM | Twitter for Android |
| Jesus Fucking Christ with the subways in Queens. Holy shit. | Wednesday, January 27, 2016 8:53:17 AM | Twitter for Android |
| @NYCTSubway why hasn't there been a Manhattan bound R train at 46th st in over 30 minutes? Site says good service | Wednesday, January 27, 2016 8:50:16 AM | Twitter for Android |
| CUNCEL. I can't get fuckin anywhere in this city https://t.co/ILqoPmUie4 | Tuesday, January 26, 2016 9:17:11 AM | Twitter for Android |
| 1.5 hours and still not home yet. Missing the X-Files because NYC's 110 year old piece of shit transit system can't handle a little snow. | Monday, January 25, 2016 8:02:22 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Unacceptable horse shit infrastructure you fucking cunts. @NYCTSubway | Monday, January 25, 2016 7:54:53 PM | Twitter for Android |
| You've got @LonnieQuinnTV yappin about icebergs floating down the street down the shore. Iceberg! Dead ahead! | Saturday, January 23, 2016 3:43:48 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Thunder snow! ⚡❄⛄⚡"Astronaut in Space Spots Rare Thundersnow in Blizzard Over Eastern US (Photo)" https://t.co/KuZoZ2EJN7 #space #feedly | Saturday, January 23, 2016 3:36:11 PM | Twitter for Android |
| It's fuckin raining in Manhattan. Pussies | Friday, January 22, 2016 10:11:32 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Bring on the snow bitch #GlobalWarming | Friday, January 22, 2016 9:12:33 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I just don't understand how people here can just leave deuces unflushed in the work shitters | Friday, January 22, 2016 10:35:12 AM | Twitter for Android |
| I hate lower Manhattan, I hate the entire MTA, I hate the economy, I hate New York City, I hate work, and I hate being a hater all the time | Wednesday, January 20, 2016 6:43:58 PM | Twitter for Android |
| I hate everything right now | Wednesday, January 20, 2016 6:35:55 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @__JLu and dint even have texting my freshman year In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Monday, January 18, 2016 9:00:21 PM | Twitter for Android |
| @__JLu I was rocking that 2009 Moto Droid with the physical keyboard like no one else's business. | Monday, January 18, 2016 8:59:56 PM | Twitter for Android |
| Why does this jaggoff think it's necessary to play his phone games on full volume? #thefuckingsubway | Monday, January 18, 2016 9:26:34 AM | Twitter for Android |
| How is there "train traffic ahead" when the R didn't show up for 15 minutes? | Thursday, January 14, 2016 12:07:47 PM | Twitter for Android |
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