1530 tweets posted from Twitter Web App
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Yeah, this makes perfect sense. Ohio, a backwards assed red state that could give two shits about the environment, doesn't require emissions testing, yet is getting money from VW's fake emissions reporting. How'd they pull that one off?

https://t.co/4lrZdLzImV
Monday, January 24, 2022 3:08:39 PMTwitter Web App
@madebygoogle Care to explain why the Pixel Superfans community is just marketing / good story propaganda? I posted a negative experience and it completely vanished. Wasn't even listed as rejected in the moderation queue. Just disappeared.
In reply to @madebygoogle's tweet
Monday, January 24, 2022 2:52:37 PMTwitter Web App
Oh great, I see the fucking recession started. Thanks Obama Monday, January 24, 2022 11:36:36 AMTwitter Web App
Worst of all, my dog doesn't like going on walks with me anymore and refuses.

But at least it's snowing
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Monday, January 24, 2022 11:10:23 AMTwitter Web App
Everyone's fighting with me, I disappoint everyone, I'm scattered and forgetful as fuck, my phone is broken, I've been persistently pissed off and mean all weekend, and the universe is fucking giving me the worst karma.

Put me out of my gd misery I'm done with this shit
Monday, January 24, 2022 11:08:56 AMTwitter Web App
Oh what a bummer, I've always liked Eric Clapton's music but I didn't realize he was a fucking asshole: https://t.co/caVci9tad8

And he's complaining he lost friends? Eat a dick
Monday, January 24, 2022 10:56:27 AMTwitter Web App
Fuck my entire life Monday, January 24, 2022 10:49:02 AMTwitter Web App
the Twitter v2 api is a fuckin pain in the ass. Used to just be able to get the reply username right back in the response, but now I have to enable expansions for it and loop fucking trough them and add code to map them together https://t.co/2KYPykD5Hp Monday, January 24, 2022 12:15:12 AMTwitter Web App
@madebygoogle I just don't understand how a screen cracks and breaks the AMOLED from falling from knee height on a wood floor. It wasn't even a bad drop.

THE FUCKING CORNER WAS STICKING OUT OF THE CASE. DON'T USE ROUNDED CORNERS ANYMORE
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, January 23, 2022 8:46:39 AMTwitter Web App
What kind of a piece of shit design cracks when failling from knee height onto a wood floor? I've broken screens on concrete before and I get it but this is FUCKING UNACCPTABLE
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, January 23, 2022 8:34:55 AMTwitter Web App
@Corning @madebygoogle Who decided on the rounded edges? I want their head
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, January 23, 2022 8:34:01 AMTwitter Web App
In case anyone was wondering if @Corning Gorilla Glass Vicuts is any good, it's a fucking piece of shit. Along with @madebygoogle Pixel 6 Pro and their cocksucking rounded corners that shatter Sunday, January 23, 2022 8:28:29 AMTwitter Web App
Incoming rant. Let's see if Twitter bans me Sunday, January 23, 2022 8:27:54 AMTwitter Web App
This is what I get for being lazy and not updating my VPS in like 6 years. OS, php, DB is so gd old, nothing works once I started migrating it to something modern. And I'll need to rewrite a couple of apps.

NOTHING F'IN WORKS. Why am I not containerizing this shit
Saturday, January 22, 2022 2:58:25 AMTwitter Web App
Jesus Christ almighty https://t.co/GJzZ7MIxrG https://t.co/ACDFnkEmTZ Friday, January 21, 2022 10:06:26 AMTwitter Web App
My doggo is the most food motivated. I had a lick-able plate and she was whining/begging/following me for it. Then I called her a crazy fuckin' bastard and she stopped dead in her tracks, got mad at me and didn't follow the plate, like she understood. Kid you not. The sassy betch Tuesday, January 18, 2022 11:26:08 PMTwitter Web App
I'd like to take credit that they fixed it because I called them out on their shit, and they wouldn't have noticed until my tweet.

Probably not the case, but it's nice to dream
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Wednesday, January 12, 2022 5:46:39 PMTwitter Web App
You can't have your executives talk shit to Apple (I agree with him btw) about them not supporting RCS and then having a buggy fuckin RCS service yourself. Fix the goddamn bugs
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Wednesday, January 12, 2022 2:08:21 PMTwitter Web App
@madebygoogle Acknowledge the fact that updates to the Messages app and Carrier Services broke RCS for the majority of users.

Typical Google buggy bullshit. I'm sick of it
Wednesday, January 12, 2022 2:04:08 PMTwitter Web App
Google's Jibe RCS is a buggy piece of shit that fails frequently Wednesday, January 12, 2022 11:22:23 AMTwitter Web App
Fucking typescript and pulumi. Anytime I try to do goddamn anything, nothing works Monday, January 10, 2022 1:41:23 PMTwitter Web App
Zero sympathy. Cero. https://t.co/v99AwFY4Jm Monday, January 10, 2022 10:36:04 AMTwitter Web App
Jesus H. Christ. I've got senior engineers who can't clone a goddamn git repo over here. I'm on a call trying to show them advanced shit and they can't even figure out how to clone the repo and find it on their file system. Get the actual fuck out of here Monday, January 10, 2022 9:59:33 AMTwitter Web App
I'm literally obsessed with this Discord server I'm on: https://t.co/ZTHEcv6jOE Thursday, January 06, 2022 5:50:34 PMTwitter Web App
MLB is a damn joke. They still haven't reached an agreement with the players? https://t.co/aLRj9y6VGI looks like a damn cartoon website with a bunch of bullshit filler articles from the past.

Manfred ruined the game and is a shit commissioner.
Thursday, January 06, 2022 11:31:02 AMTwitter Web App
Avoid double trouble: don't break the law while you're breaking the law. Friday, December 17, 2021 2:58:26 PMTwitter Web App
Discord is bullshit. You should be able to use animated emoji if you boost a server. Why do I need Nitro Friday, December 17, 2021 10:48:14 AMTwitter Web App
Very simple. You're not fully vaccinated unless you've had three Moderna or Pfizer doses. Period.

J&J is a garbage vaccine, and if you only had two Moderna/Pfizer shots, you're at risk

https://t.co/TVx8Bdg4Pu
Friday, December 17, 2021 10:21:34 AMTwitter Web App
How is this even news... Am I missing something? Mars has Olympus Mons, the largest volcano in the solar system... Why are we surprised Mars has volcanic rock? https://t.co/FYmG2ppL1t Thursday, December 16, 2021 12:30:19 AMTwitter Web App
Why is my @WyzeCam bulb still offline in the app? I see it connected to my WiFi network and the AWS outage was solved earlier this afternoon Wednesday, December 15, 2021 11:50:57 PMTwitter Web App
JFC AWS, stop breaking the gd internet Wednesday, December 15, 2021 10:54:58 AMTwitter Web App
@SecuritySith @notshenetworks AWS again
In reply to @SecuritySith's tweet
Wednesday, December 15, 2021 10:49:25 AMTwitter Web App
Took a week off and the place pretty much burned to the ground. Now I'm back and it's still burning to the ground. Can I go back on vacation? Wednesday, December 15, 2021 9:28:24 AMTwitter Web App
So you mean to tell me these jokers literally withdrew $4k and vanished once they were charged with manslaughter? And their lawyers said "they're not running" but then they were captured in a warehouse...

Who'da thunk?!?!? https://t.co/oAsbOYP37g
Sunday, December 05, 2021 2:01:16 AMTwitter Web App
I'm tired of this fucking company. Literally someone please buy them or let them IPO so I can cash the fuck out and move on with my life Friday, December 03, 2021 10:33:46 AMTwitter Web App
JFC. Our web app is a piece of shit and has been crashing daily (it's all database shit) and now they're adding an additional incident commander rotation on top of my on-call rotation. Fuck me and this shitty application Friday, December 03, 2021 10:30:05 AMTwitter Web App
TypeScript can suck it Wednesday, December 01, 2021 5:30:25 PMTwitter Web App
I literally can't even follow along because the example code doesn't fucking work due to differing versions of node, and antique npm packages with breaking changes.

This Pluralsight lesson gets an F-

Fuck outta hea
https://t.co/lbD3O6SocA
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Tuesday, November 30, 2021 2:38:01 PMTwitter Web App
TypeScript is a horseshit programming language. nodejs. and npm can also fuck right off.

I can't believe some asshole thought it was a good idea to use this bullshit for infra automation instead of say, python.
Tuesday, November 30, 2021 12:05:05 PMTwitter Web App
@RMerlinDev I noticed in your changelog, you merged with GPL 386_45581 for the next release. How does that compare with the Asus firmware for the ax86u? Are these fixes included? https://t.co/5gM5AmCaig Tuesday, November 30, 2021 1:12:53 AMTwitter Web App
Why does @googlenest not support the temperature sensor in the Google Home app? They're obviously migrating away from the Nest app, but you cannot control or see which sensor is active in Google Home or on Nest Hubs. Why not?

Feature parity please! @googlenesthelp
Monday, November 22, 2021 10:53:47 PMTwitter Web App
I just... I hate people Wednesday, November 17, 2021 9:34:59 AMTwitter Web App
I get the science that it makes more sense to get initial doses to more people over boosters, but there are some real dumb, Trumpy, motherfuckers out there and I need to protect my fam from them
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Tuesday, November 16, 2021 9:37:39 AMTwitter Web App
Scandal your ass. Boosters are fine. What about all the fuckin idiots who refuse the vaccine? Let them get sick and die, I plan to live.

https://t.co/ggEiTXBtL2
Tuesday, November 16, 2021 9:28:26 AMTwitter Web App
@hosain719 @Russ_Wilcox @NPR This actually is a good point. Who is actually within 6 feet of a deer's respirations? What are they doing, smooching?
In reply to @hosain719's tweet
Wednesday, November 10, 2021 11:34:02 PMTwitter Web App
Oh this is so fucked. Thanks for all this shit, ̷l̷a̷b̷ ̷i̷n̷ ̷C̷h̷i̷n̷a̷, I mean bats https://t.co/CFyzpE1ZW7 Wednesday, November 10, 2021 11:31:44 PMTwitter Web App
@AjitPai @_jaewonkang @WSJ Obviously Joe Biden's fault. Heil Trumpf! All these hippie liberals ruining our country. I mean, we need you back in the FCC so you can sacrifice the blood of robocallers and implement the great firewall of the USA to protect us from Evil China.
In reply to @AjitPai's tweet
Tuesday, November 09, 2021 10:24:06 AMTwitter Web App
I'm firing off fighting words on a Tuesday morning https://t.co/5ySCBMygYu Tuesday, November 09, 2021 10:21:27 AMTwitter Web App
@tedcruz Ted, you're an asshole
In reply to @tedcruz's tweet
Monday, November 08, 2021 5:51:43 PMTwitter Web App
I just want someone to fucking be on my team one goddamn time, is that too much to ask Friday, October 29, 2021 9:57:58 PMTwitter Web App
My patience with Kent has been eliminated. Dude left a year ago and I'm still fixing all of his bullshit code https://t.co/2tTd0hqNZt Wednesday, October 27, 2021 9:50:25 AMTwitter Web App
Look at this fucking cartoon license plate. Christ almighty https://t.co/8SPFA8jn8V Friday, October 22, 2021 2:07:43 AMTwitter Web App
What in the actual fucking hell is wrong with people. I've lost all faith in humanity. Hit control-alt-delete on the human race, it's hopeless https://t.co/yPJk6IlmTr Thursday, October 21, 2021 12:49:15 AMTwitter Web App
@BarstoolHubbs This motherfucker Laz Diaz is still around? I remember that asshole calling shitty games when I was like 10 years old when the Yankees actually were good.
In reply to @BarstoolHubbs's tweet
Thursday, October 21, 2021 12:24:04 AMTwitter Web App
I swear flies understand when you're trying to kill them and then become more elusive. IDK if I scared it or it's just me being way overly aggressive, but the minute I came into my office with my salt gun and said "I'm gonna kill this fuckin motherfucker" it vanished. Thursday, October 21, 2021 12:11:27 AMTwitter Web App
Three more years of this useless bitch. Cancel the Yankees until 2024, or until Cashmen is either fired or dies. Hal's an idiot and George is spinning in his grave

https://t.co/eAfYM2kbPc
Tuesday, October 19, 2021 10:42:14 AMTwitter Web App
Yes, because there are a lot of hick dumb motherfuckin rednecks in this state who have been brainwashed by Trump https://t.co/9pTEcEmJhD Tuesday, October 19, 2021 10:39:58 AMTwitter Web App
Wow, how incorrect I was. I sound like fuckin trumper https://t.co/XZcsTiZQsQ Tuesday, October 12, 2021 4:40:06 PMTwitter Web App
I love that I was out last week, and it took me a few days to notice that 1) no one knows wtf they're doing in git and 2) they fucked up so much shit I never would have let happen if I were actually there because I had an unmerged PR

Fuckssake
Monday, October 11, 2021 2:46:28 PMTwitter Web App
https://t.co/lqcf1Oz0s5

So about that billion dollars we're just giving to Israel for no reason...
Tuesday, September 28, 2021 2:10:29 PMTwitter Web App
blasting nips, just like everyone on 90s tv shows
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Monday, September 27, 2021 5:16:50 PMTwitter Web App
A video of Jeter's last at-bat walkoff just popped on and my nipples got so hard. Well, it's also that it's freakin freezing in my basement Monday, September 27, 2021 5:16:31 PMTwitter Web App
This article is shit & I'm not surprised to see @USRepLong is an old fat white man. Maybe big dick Biden isn't the best, but he inherited a complete shitshow and a lot these points are things Trump set up for failure & the pres can't directly control
https://t.co/LFmbsh5A9i
Thursday, September 23, 2021 12:26:38 PMTwitter Web App
👋bye. gt the f out and good luck not dying from covid https://t.co/5TjckH5nTW Thursday, September 23, 2021 10:05:25 AMTwitter Web App
@centralyorksd You guys also deny science and ban masks? Think Trump won, huh? Get real.
In reply to @centralyorksd's tweet
Thursday, September 16, 2021 2:08:03 PMTwitter Web App
@centralyorksd Racist
In reply to @centralyorksd's tweet
Thursday, September 16, 2021 2:07:04 PMTwitter Web App
@centralyorksd YOU GUYS ONLY GOING TO HAVE WHITE PEOPLE FIX IT?
In reply to @centralyorksd's tweet
Thursday, September 16, 2021 2:06:29 PMTwitter Web App
foot first through the wood chipper for this fuckin guy: https://t.co/rCBeclT1Kx Tuesday, September 14, 2021 4:37:09 PMTwitter Web App
Texas better fuckin start paying out childcare payments to these 6 week fetuses, just sayin Wednesday, September 01, 2021 12:35:44 PMTwitter Web App
@GovRonDeSantis I got the vaccine and wear a mask. I know I'm going to make it.
In reply to @GovRonDeSantis's tweet
Tuesday, August 31, 2021 12:56:43 PMTwitter Web App
WTF is the point of NFT art? You're spending like $500+ in crypto to own the rights to an image file on a blockchain. Tuesday, August 31, 2021 12:55:05 PMTwitter Web App
@RMerlinDev How difficult is all your custom OpenVPN changes you've just worked on compared with the Asus changes? Or did you know about this and design it so it'd be easy to reconcile?
In reply to @RMerlinDev's tweet
Tuesday, August 31, 2021 11:37:27 AMTwitter Web App
https://t.co/S8a6PCl8Zp

No, I disagree. If you're a dumb motherfucker, you should take all the horse deworming medicine you want for covid. Killy yourselves! Eliminate yourselves from society the gene pool. We don't need you here
Tuesday, August 31, 2021 1:27:54 AMTwitter Web App
Let's get these boosters approved immediately, boys... We've got dumb fuckin Trump lunatics killing everyone with covid, and breakthrough infections are becoming more common: https://t.co/mWJnWG9tmS Friday, August 27, 2021 10:21:44 AMTwitter Web App
@GovRonDeSantis How's it going, asshole? https://t.co/PapIhkE4lT Thursday, August 26, 2021 1:33:06 PMTwitter Web App
These antivaxxing variant factory, reality-denying morons have blood on their hands and fucked up all our good progress against Covid. Thanks assholes https://t.co/c0mG0E9Gdx Thursday, August 26, 2021 1:26:13 PMTwitter Web App
Ya'll basics are hopping on the pumpkin spice already, but you've all forgotten that we're right in the middle of global warming... Shit's not getting cold outside until the end of October Wednesday, August 25, 2021 12:42:47 AMTwitter Web App
These Justin Flom, 10000% staged, dragged out, full of shit videos that pop up are the worst. The fact that some algorithm suggested this shit to me, it got it completely wrong. Unless I'm an A/B experiment to see if I rage... They're controlling us Wednesday, August 25, 2021 12:16:59 AMTwitter Web App
Burn this fuckin place to the ground. We don't want this riff raff here. https://t.co/NRW2qW5jfu Friday, August 20, 2021 10:11:52 AMTwitter Web App
CNN is doing more harm than good with this shit on the front page. Listen, I know the planet is fucked. I know that the other side doesn't believe in climate change. But all this is doing is giving normal people severe anxiety reading this shit day in and day out. https://t.co/d3UT5CAgbd Thursday, August 19, 2021 5:59:49 PMTwitter Web App
I AM EXCITE. Free tix to Fall Out Boy, Weezer and Green Day. That's right. Enjoy Tuesday, August 17, 2021 4:14:52 PMTwitter Web App
Everyone sell all your stock because clearly that's the thing to do after the fall of some shithole country the US has been dicking around in for 20 years, spending Trillions of dollars with no benefit Monday, August 16, 2021 10:00:30 AMTwitter Web App
IMPEACH HIM and give him a cognitive test. Clearly, the man's mind is failing 🙄
https://t.co/rB2Pnserxu
Thursday, August 12, 2021 2:32:54 PMTwitter Web App
These absolute morons. Very detailed bug ticket I got here. How the hell am I supposed to fix something with no gd information provided https://t.co/FOCuzwWYWU Tuesday, August 10, 2021 11:16:08 AMTwitter Web App
JESUS CHRIST WITH THIS YANKEE GAME. Why am I staying up watching this meaningless shit, blowing 5 save opportunities Tuesday, August 10, 2021 1:02:06 AMTwitter Web App
And Rob Manfred is a fuckin asshole with this runner on second in extras rule. How is it supposed to shorten the game. It's lengthening it Tuesday, August 10, 2021 12:23:55 AMTwitter Web App
The Yankees fuckin stink over here. Blow their lead bottom 9 with 2 outs 2 strikes, then blow a 5-3 lead in extras Tuesday, August 10, 2021 12:23:13 AMTwitter Web App
@BarstoolHubbs JFC this team is enraging
In reply to @BarstoolHubbs's tweet
Tuesday, August 10, 2021 12:19:53 AMTwitter Web App
RT @nachosarah: instead of anti-vaxxers let’s call them dumb bitches like sorry you can’t come to the party because you’re a dumb bitch Monday, August 09, 2021 1:29:02 AMTwitter Web App
Nest tech support is fucking useless. Google fuckin is pure garbage Friday, August 06, 2021 1:57:07 AMTwitter Web App
Spirit is a piece of shit airline that needs to just go out of business. Staffing shortages and system outages cause 4 days of cancelling half your flights? Useless.

Flew them once in 2015 and nearly had a nervous breakdown, they sucked so bad. Fuck em.
Wednesday, August 04, 2021 2:42:08 PMTwitter Web App
"Oh but it's child abuse." "They can't tell me what to do" It's a fucking piece of cloth you idiots. Kids are resilient Granted, there could be exceptions

Yeah it's a pain in the ass but don't you want this pandemic shit to end?
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Wednesday, August 04, 2021 12:02:10 AMTwitter Web App
To all you fuckin Trumpy motherfuckers trying to ban masks in schools this year, here are your facts from the American Academy of Pediatrics, you stupid fucks. It's not just infecting the olds. Kids under 12 / compromised cannot be vaccinated https://t.co/aTjauRYy6E Tuesday, August 03, 2021 11:59:54 PMTwitter Web App
Cancel this season, but I'm pumped for 2022 w/ these kids coming up. Just have to focus on making sure the weaklings stay healthy Tuesday, August 03, 2021 11:53:30 PMTwitter Web App
Time is just a wild thing, my dudes. https://t.co/qHIcDwsVmt Monday, August 02, 2021 11:51:32 PMTwitter Web App
I want more data on those 6600 severe breakthrough cases. What percentage of those received the inferior J&J vaccine? https://t.co/BxkkqROvlk Monday, August 02, 2021 1:24:58 PMTwitter Web App
Big expectations for @sundarpichai and @rosterloh's 'deep technology investments' on the Pixel 6.

DON'T RELEASE A PIECE OF SHIT THIS TIME AROUND AND GIVE US FREE @googlephotos storage

My Pixel 4 is due for an upgrade and it's 100% dependent on free pic storage
Thursday, July 29, 2021 5:33:36 PMTwitter Web App
Jesus Christ almighty. My piece of shit work laptop dropped wifi in the middle of an apt-get upgrade and fucked up my gitlab instnace Monday, July 26, 2021 5:23:43 PMTwitter Web App
Now I have to scheduled a maintenance window and rotate them. Literally having these outsourced devs gives me more work than if they just didn't work for us
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Thursday, July 22, 2021 9:48:41 AMTwitter Web App
We literally had a guy paste a read-write connection string for three of our apps' configuration management services in plaintext in a wiki. Literally anyone with that can read all of our secret configs You IMBECILE
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Thursday, July 22, 2021 9:47:46 AMTwitter Web App