1530 tweets posted from Twitter Web App
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| Tweet | Date | Source |
|---|---|---|
| I literally have no idea what I do at work anymore. No one knows anything, no one helps, no one trains. | Tuesday, April 19, 2022 11:55:01 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Can't someone just off Putin? Guy's gotta go | Tuesday, April 19, 2022 9:56:29 AM | Twitter Web App |
| JFC. I updated Home Assistant last week and it broke fucking everything | Monday, April 18, 2022 3:06:38 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Good. Someone kept sticking all this idiot cult stickers all over signs in my neighborhood and I've ripped every single one of them down the instant I saw them https://t.co/kskKXhA48N | Monday, April 18, 2022 2:22:40 PM | Twitter Web App |
| The FUCK is MLB scheduling games for 11am EST on a Monday. Kind of shit is that. Messing with my fantasy team lineup | Monday, April 18, 2022 11:58:14 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Yes you got this wrong. I'm telling the truth here Twitter. Geez, Elon needs to take this shit over, it's gone to the birds (see what I did there? I'm so punny) https://t.co/LD4XgLvMic | Thursday, April 14, 2022 3:56:37 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @karenkasler Breaking: Ohio politicians are morons In reply to @karenkasler's tweet | Thursday, April 14, 2022 3:55:13 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @NetSecNick @_sysengineer I like Microsoft as of late, but I just can't get Hyper-V to work correctly for anything. I figured it was built it and I'd use it because it was part of the OS, but it caused all kinds of probs with a Win 11 VM. VMWare for me just works for local test VMs In reply to @NetSecNick's tweet | Thursday, April 14, 2022 2:48:54 PM | Twitter Web App |
| An A-Bomb! From Matsui! In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Thursday, April 14, 2022 2:27:28 PM | Twitter Web App |
| When I saw John Sterling trending on Twitter, I thought he kicked the bucket, but it's just everyone making fun of him for calling a fly-out as a home run, which he does multiple times every season "It is high! It is far! It isssss gonnn--- caught at the wall!" | Thursday, April 14, 2022 2:27:16 PM | Twitter Web App |
| JFC node.js is a cocksucking piece of shit | Thursday, April 14, 2022 1:52:27 PM | Twitter Web App |
| 2022: "Don't hold cash because inflation is 8%" Also 2022: "Crypto, Securities & 401(k) are all down 15%" | Tuesday, April 12, 2022 3:41:55 PM | Twitter Web App |
| This place is annoying the ever-loving piss out of me today. I'm gonna go pick up dog shit and mow my lawn instead of dealing with this noise | Tuesday, April 12, 2022 1:09:20 PM | Twitter Web App |
| It's mind-boggling how freakin' dumb these outsourced engineers are. Like actually unfit to be in technology and lack any kin d of basic aptitude | Tuesday, April 12, 2022 12:39:47 PM | Twitter Web App |
| iCloud's web app is being a piece of shit right now and i need to find my goddamn work phone https://t.co/XY4RgAKUQd | Tuesday, April 12, 2022 9:53:11 AM | Twitter Web App |
| I mean if these dumb mf-ers want to pay an Engineer IV salary to sit here and create user accounts that a 19 year old intern could do for 30k/year, that's their problem | Tuesday, April 12, 2022 9:41:26 AM | Twitter Web App |
| I hate what my job turned into and I hope I can trick them into keeping me around until all my packages and shit cash out because otherwise I really don't belong here | Monday, April 11, 2022 12:30:39 PM | Twitter Web App |
| So Jesus was an alien?!?!?!? https://t.co/fXsbWWKPvB | Friday, April 08, 2022 5:40:09 PM | Twitter Web App |
| For fucks sake MLB players are weak fucking assholes. My ONLY good pitcher injures himself on opening day. Cuncel the fucking season https://t.co/DedCd0QOyf | Friday, April 08, 2022 4:00:08 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @YESNetwork IMMEDIATELY NO. https://t.co/mbxx60tbGX In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Friday, April 08, 2022 1:43:17 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Hey look, it's time for baseball. Let's see if the @YESNetwork streaming app is still as shitty as it was last season | Friday, April 08, 2022 1:40:53 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @_sysengineer I'd say use .NET 6, but it's gov't so you're probably using a really old .NET framework if I were to guess In reply to @_sysengineer's tweet | Monday, April 04, 2022 5:58:43 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Let's talk about ceiling textures. There are only two acceptable textures: completely smooth, or knockdown. Anything else, especially popcorn ceilings, look like asshole | Monday, April 04, 2022 2:14:46 PM | Twitter Web App |
| BAHAHAHAHAH. I mean, when have any of the orange cocksucker's business ventures ever not failed miserably. Guy's a chief fraud: https://t.co/SXzdv8gXx8 | Monday, April 04, 2022 12:32:40 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Putin and the Russian military are literally dumb motherfuckers. Like who actually thought it would be a good idea to drive tanks through a nuclear wasteland? Welp. Guess they'll die https://t.co/rLqfTcugxU | Friday, April 01, 2022 12:54:20 PM | Twitter Web App |
| 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 https://t.co/WRnRu5yHS0 | Tuesday, March 29, 2022 9:38:44 AM | Twitter Web App |
| @_sysengineer https://t.co/KqO0QnlUVu In reply to @_sysengineer's tweet | Monday, March 28, 2022 9:43:13 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Yo @madebygoogle @rosterloh Stop focusing so much on Snapchat for Pixel feature drops. No one uses that shit anymore. It's a dumb ass app. Seriously, how much are they paying you to promote their dumb platform? Few people care about Snapchat. Work on something cooler. Jeez. https://t.co/pJdCZ4oqSw | Monday, March 28, 2022 4:53:28 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I'm doing my taxes and this is enraging me. Anything under $5 should be ignored. I have to do all this useless shit to report fucking pennies in tax exempt income on a state by state basis so it adds of to 55 cents. This is why the system is bullshit, people. https://t.co/ibKoQGXR9u | Thursday, March 24, 2022 10:29:49 PM | Twitter Web App |
| LMAO the pair of balls on Putin to just steal Kraft's Superbowl ring so nonchalantly and then the US forced him to say it was a gift. This is a bananas storyhttps://www.msn.com/en-us/sports/nba/vladimir-putin-stole-a-super-bowl-ring-from-robert-kraft/ar-AAVsduk | Thursday, March 24, 2022 1:15:30 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @mustang_sarah Actually, I've discussed this before: https://t.co/1BkPaMQ3X7 In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Wednesday, March 23, 2022 4:58:13 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @mustang_sarah @CumberdickB I have a book of nursery rhymes and it's immediately obvious which ones are of British origin In reply to @mustang_sarah's tweet | Wednesday, March 23, 2022 3:24:59 PM | Twitter Web App |
| OMG @madebygoogle THANK YOU for fixing the fingerprint reader in the March patches. It actually doesn't suck anymore. This was my number one complaint, and now it's great! Haven't seen any lag or mis-reads at all | Tuesday, March 22, 2022 10:28:09 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Obviously a lab leak in China... You don't just have a brand new lab built to study respiratory viruses, then have employees get mysteriously sick, then hide shit from the world. Sorry. https://t.co/Z4mARVcwzf | Monday, March 21, 2022 11:30:03 AM | Twitter Web App |
| I love how dems and people are getting all up in arms about how quickly gas goes up but doesn't go down as quick... Just invest in oil and share their profits to make up for the higher gas prices. Duh. | Monday, March 21, 2022 11:26:18 AM | Twitter Web App |
| I am so punny without even realizing it. Holy crap, I didn't even mean to do this https://t.co/QKF4sfGscA | Friday, March 18, 2022 11:07:18 PM | Twitter Web App |
| OK, I'm going to have to take a break from here because everything is pissing me off and my tweets are beyond out of control, even though they're all very factual | Friday, March 18, 2022 11:05:21 PM | Twitter Web App |
| What a GD loser. This guy literally got into a fist fight with an old dude at a Republican debate and called him a pussy. God would love that. You fucking hack @JoshMandelOhio https://t.co/mTBjcxsYq9 | Friday, March 18, 2022 11:01:37 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @JoshMandelOhio Bruh you literally almost got into a fist fight with some old dude at a debate and called him a pussy. Get the FUCK out. You don't represent my values. In reply to @JoshMandelOhio's tweet | Friday, March 18, 2022 10:57:56 PM | Twitter Web App |
| They are forgiven. Handled the case very well from a customer support perspective. Kudos Google for making it right. 👏 In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Friday, March 18, 2022 10:53:52 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @TIME I'm sorry, but I shouldn't have to drive less because Putin decided to be a fuckin asshole. And I'm all for being green and transitioning off fossil fuels, but that shit takes time and you need to be rich to do green energy atm | Friday, March 18, 2022 10:14:49 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I'm on with fucking google support about how their Pixel case is a piece of shit and yellowing and peeling after only 3 months and they asked me for my IMEI. Fuck does that have to do with anything. It's a gd case. The case doesn't have an IMEI. I'm actually done with them | Friday, March 18, 2022 10:06:36 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I can't do my taxes yet because my asshole investment guy didn't send me a finalized 1099. I have some half ass estimated version that is going to change. 1) I want my gd refund. I don't believe in loaning the US interest free money 2) IRS is backlogged, so it's gonna take ages | Friday, March 18, 2022 9:38:57 PM | Twitter Web App |
| HEY MARJORIE, you stupid bitch. You're banned on here for being an asshole so I can't @ you, but I hope anonymous fucks you all up https://t.co/zst6XO6lDI | Friday, March 18, 2022 10:01:58 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Warren Buffett is an asshole buying billions of dollars in Occidental Petroleum. He did it, so I was like "that billionaire cracker knows what he's doing" So I bought some too. And of course it's in the red. But it's all for the long term | Wednesday, March 16, 2022 6:41:31 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @bibliocommons Are you kidding me right now with this? Explain to me how a 4 character password is secure in the year of our lord 2022 and why your system forces 4 character passwords. https://t.co/1rzcm0jjYS In reply to @bibliocommons's tweet | Wednesday, March 16, 2022 2:11:47 PM | Twitter Web App |
| What kind of ridiculous ad is this? Who actually designs this and thinks it's a good idea? I thought I was looking at a vagina https://t.co/XNFRtC8s5u | Wednesday, March 09, 2022 10:51:58 PM | Twitter Web App |
| You can't NOT say which states got hacked. I need the idiots called out! How are you getting log4j hacked when the entire industry flipped out how serious it was. Zero excuses. Cero. Expose these jokers now- the people deserve to know. https://t.co/bbpzPHOjan | Tuesday, March 08, 2022 11:56:37 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @TheStemGroup @_sysengineer j/k https://t.co/6Z6OcLHGzv In reply to @TheStemGroup's tweet | Tuesday, March 08, 2022 4:50:53 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @Ourand_SBJ This is a bunch of horse crap and greed. We don't need exclusive online only streaming rights. Baseball is garbage these days. RIP MLB. Cancel idiot Manfried In reply to @Ourand_SBJ's tweet | Tuesday, March 08, 2022 2:03:05 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @PhillyG411 @TimGreg20 Brandon didn't raise the gas prices. Drilling and supply was cut during the pandemic and when demand came soaring back, capacity was not raised. Now oil companies would rather increase shareholder profits than drill more. Russian oil is only a few percent of what the US imports In reply to @PhillyG411's tweet | Tuesday, March 08, 2022 2:00:49 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @JJFromTheBronx They are 100% focused on shareholder returns. Warren Buffett just scooped up billions of dollars of Occidental Petroleum. Oil investments have been awful for a decade and companies flat out admitted they don't care about world tensions and won't increase output. In reply to @JJFromTheBronx's tweet | Tuesday, March 08, 2022 11:14:07 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Prediction: gas prices will hit $7.50 in Ohio in the summer, and $9+/ gallon in California | Monday, March 07, 2022 10:14:30 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Yeah, seems legit. I'm gonna blind hire this jagoff with an https://t.co/RSMUuHnBFE email address to build me a mobile app https://t.co/z0XWJdP9aY | Monday, March 07, 2022 11:32:09 AM | Twitter Web App |
| @TheRobertHatton Well besides the fact that tweet was entirely batshit, how's Truth Social working out for you? Their inept engineering team can't seem to scale it, so all 15 users on there are just circle jerking about how Biden rasied our gas prices | Monday, March 07, 2022 10:27:07 AM | Twitter Web App |
| I'm out of vinegar, but they say baking soda and vinegar. I even washed my hands in coffee grinds which helped a little but I need to stop smelling this perfume-y shit or I'll yack In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Monday, March 07, 2022 9:48:44 AM | Twitter Web App |
| A plug-in air freshener tipped over and spilled its oil all over the place and I was like wtf is that intense smell - it's not even plugged in. And once that shit's on your hands, it is IMPOSSIBLE to get rid of the smell I washed my hands like 10 times and it's strong as ever | Monday, March 07, 2022 9:47:55 AM | Twitter Web App |
| And then outsourced the entire thing to India. You idiots. What could possibly go wrong? In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Thursday, March 03, 2022 10:43:55 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Also, they wasted their time and can all eat a bag of dicks because my maintenances don't cause outages. They were like "wait, really? It worked?" Yes it worked, you imbeciles. I don't fuck things up. You destabilized the platform by moving a 15 yr old monolith to the cloud In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Thursday, March 03, 2022 10:43:32 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I love how all the gd suits showed up to my routine maintenance last night because our platform is an unstable piece of shit and they don't trust any of us. Here I am rolling in late like it's nbd and when I got there, there were like VPs and shit watching me | Thursday, March 03, 2022 10:42:18 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @Ozmosis711 @ky9 🤣 In reply to @Ozmosis711's tweet | Wednesday, March 02, 2022 3:25:13 PM | Twitter Web App |
| omg people on Nextdoor are so stupid. A thread complaining about automated grocery store checkouts led to this idiot responding to someone who brought up Ukraine. Allegedly, the US is being invaded and we don't even know where these people are coming from? Which galaxy?!? https://t.co/YxWeJfyECA | Wednesday, March 02, 2022 12:37:07 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I'm being a gd reckless savage right now. I'm over here bypassing PRs, rewriting git history and force pushing to main at 11PM at night | Monday, February 28, 2022 11:18:09 PM | Twitter Web App |
| This actually broke me https://t.co/dre86GVIcI Like I actually couldn't handle it. I have a baby girl. They were only getting groceries. Her wounded dad was right there. She was wearing unicorn pajamas. Send Putin foot first through a wood chipper | Monday, February 28, 2022 7:38:44 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I fucking hate TypeScript. I fucking hate TypeScript. I fucking hate TypeScript. I fucking hate TypeScript. I fucking hate TypeScript. I fucking hate TypeScript. I fucking hate TypeScript. I fucking hate TypeScript. I fucking hate TypeScript. I fucking hate TypeScript. | Monday, February 28, 2022 7:02:37 PM | Twitter Web App |
| This put me into a fucking MOOD today because it works like shit with Elasticache and something super simple gave me the runaround and I want to punch the fucking person who picked this shit over Terraform In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Monday, February 28, 2022 7:01:21 PM | Twitter Web App |
| @_sysengineer This isn't your server so I can speak my mind, and it looks like we'll agree. He's a dummy that's followed by Barstool bros or delusional Trumpists In reply to @_sysengineer's tweet | Monday, February 28, 2022 12:00:46 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I just saved you stupid fucks $3000/month, now where's my bonus | Thursday, February 24, 2022 11:00:01 PM | Twitter Web App |
| fuggoff with this shit. I'm enjoying the waning pandemic: https://t.co/JzQoLp55qy | Tuesday, February 22, 2022 2:50:29 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Jesus Christ, @SlackHQ get your shit together | Tuesday, February 22, 2022 11:07:31 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Our DB team has a dev DB stack that's sized to be prod-like, except it's not even really used and is almost $2000/month in EBS volumes and half the attached instances are powered down. The FUCK do they think they're doing? | Monday, February 21, 2022 9:19:54 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I CANNOT wait for Truth Social to launch so I can troll the absolute shit out of it | Monday, February 21, 2022 10:04:34 AM | Twitter Web App |
| I mean... The poor guy inherited a gd mess from a psychopath, but on the other hand, the fact that we thought a senile old white man was the best choice is another problem. https://t.co/ZFkEtGRZed | Friday, February 18, 2022 11:09:02 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Fuckin Putin needs to cut out this Ukraine shit. Will you fuckers just smoke a blunt and chill? It's making all my energy prices too expensive | Friday, February 18, 2022 10:25:28 AM | Twitter Web App |
| jfc my natural gas bill was bullshit this month. | Friday, February 18, 2022 2:10:53 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Opened up my powershell core profile and found a blast from the past and me being me (a grumpy bastard) https://t.co/VgiKF13gru | Friday, February 18, 2022 1:56:42 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Hello Sidney. Whatcha worried about? Some incriminating phone calls that day? You muppet-faced prick? You're all going down https://t.co/TtwT2wm0q9 | Thursday, February 17, 2022 9:46:23 PM | Twitter Web App |
| There is no explanation for how much I fucking hate working with TypeScript | Thursday, February 17, 2022 5:49:16 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Welp, took an online test and it told me I'm an asshole who doesn't trust anyone https://t.co/Lbrj9QhfuN | Wednesday, February 16, 2022 12:06:41 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Man fuck this entire place. I'm done. It's now my entire goal to stay here only to take as much as I can from them and give as little as possible. Then they can all eat a bag of dicks | Tuesday, February 15, 2022 10:33:39 AM | Twitter Web App |
| @notshenetworks I hate those dreams. Literally used to have recurring dreams where my teeth are rotting and brittle and I'm pulling them out in fractions. So unsettling and seems so real at the time In reply to @notshenetworks's tweet | Tuesday, February 08, 2022 3:04:53 PM | Twitter Web App |
| "Sry, I used to be a Nazi and I also hid child abuse scandals. Can you forgive me so I can go to heaven now tho?" -Joseph Ratzinger / Pope Benedict XVI https://t.co/6XLmZbGS23 | Tuesday, February 08, 2022 12:45:16 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I just started working 20 minutes ago and it didn't take much to put me in a foul mood. I'm immediately annoyed at all of our bullshit and we have a team in India working overnight that doesn't do a gd thing and ignores all alerts and now I have to clean up their shit | Tuesday, February 08, 2022 9:56:39 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Technology themed political incorrectness. https://t.co/Q10KxtU0HI | Sunday, February 06, 2022 11:40:41 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Damnnnn, Americans are stupid af: https://t.co/y8JcnWNMT0 Insurance companies should deny all covid related claims if you aren't vaccinated. Why should they have to pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for imbeciles to be on ventilators for weeks at a time when it's preventable | Sunday, February 06, 2022 10:47:42 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I'm concerned about me sometimes. Like give my gd deficient brain the strongest amphetamines that exist and I might actually become a normal person In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Thursday, February 03, 2022 1:27:45 AM | Twitter Web App |
| And as soon as the poison control person answered, I found the raspberry with the pills tucked in it on the other side of the counter and was like "whoops, false alarm. I thought I ate some of my dog's medicine in a raspberry but then I just found it. ✌ out" In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Thursday, February 03, 2022 1:24:09 AM | Twitter Web App |
| So about that time I had to call poison control on myself because I had allegedly eaten 100mg of my dog's Lasix (diuretic / water pill) that I hid in a raspberry because I also started snacking on raspberries and am a scatterbrained asshole. | Thursday, February 03, 2022 1:18:06 AM | Twitter Web App |
| I scrape data from a web app that has no API for offline processing. They were trying to be cute by CloudFlare banning my curl requests, but I just switched instances and modified the request to pretend to be Firefox | Wednesday, February 02, 2022 5:59:15 PM | Twitter Web App |
| I just accidentally paid off my entire phone which was interest free for 2 years because I set up autopay wrong and now my checking account is fucked and I'm not getting paid for two weeks. | Tuesday, February 01, 2022 11:53:58 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Everything's annoying the fuck out of me today | Tuesday, February 01, 2022 11:40:49 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Annnnd tomorrow I'll sleep | Tuesday, February 01, 2022 3:07:47 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Need to test batch updates In reply to @portfolioso's tweet | Tuesday, February 01, 2022 2:25:37 AM | Twitter Web App |
| Does my new importer work? | Tuesday, February 01, 2022 2:25:26 AM | Twitter Web App |
| I always end up staying up way too late dicking around with the Twitter API for no good reason | Tuesday, February 01, 2022 2:18:30 AM | Twitter Web App |
| And why the fuck can't Postman easily use refresh tokens for OAuth 2? Shit's been a feature request for over two years, and every time my token expires, I need to go through the entire flow again | Monday, January 31, 2022 5:05:47 PM | Twitter Web App |
| Fuck TypeScript. I hate this bullshit | Monday, January 31, 2022 5:03:04 PM | Twitter Web App |
| TIL that Gen Z doesn't understand leet speak, and I've never felt older in my life (question prompt was what words/phrases do you want to see come back) https://t.co/Zfcy9ZNBeG | Friday, January 28, 2022 5:39:25 PM | Twitter Web App |
| 💩poop💩 (that is all) | Friday, January 28, 2022 2:52:11 AM | Twitter Web App |
| I need this here tweet to see if my code is working | Thursday, January 27, 2022 2:59:45 PM | Twitter Web App |