Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

Bold move by our recruiter. Straight up asked one of my engineers how his lady situation was doing and winked at him #shewantsthedick

I fucking hate this shit

I'm about to pull a Billy Walsh on this rollout and Booker

Our rollouts suck dick

I like wearing sneakers, my dude

John. Shut the fuck up

Security guys just have no fucking idea and are the least practical. All they care about is fixing the vulnerability, not breaking shit

Kevin. The second you start micromanaging and asking what I'm working on every 3 minutes is when I fuckin walk out and take lunch

Maybe this incident will finish McGivern off. Don't think his ticker can withstand another outage.

I could've at least fixed the fuckin problem in my sleep instead of our fucking system being down for hours

Let me just reiterate the severity: Got up, turned on my light and computer, put in my VPN pin+token id. Went back to bed. Woke up confused.

I think I just sleep-worked on production... Woke up to 20 mins worth of alerts, light on and my VPN was connected. THE FUCK

I have an unhealthy obsession with Jennifer Lawrence

Been out drinking since like 11am. Am I a pussy if I just wanna go home and chill the most?

I waited on Joan Jett. She had a Jameson neat.