Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

I had so much blue Curacao that my poop is blue

Plane doesn't even land for 5 minutes and I already had 3 things to rage about in this cess pool city

Yo @__JLu ... My friend Bob Johnson traveled with us. https://t.co/dD7FiuyKB4

Savage move that the bartender is secretly giving booze to the cops in a coffee cup. Mad respect. Mad respect. I love this country.

Cuncel da @Delta. 100% of flights I ever booked with them were delayed.

Can't leave this troublemaker for 5 mins and they sent the po po over. @MalJNew https://t.co/rArb3xWFCX

Bartender's doing buybacks at the airportbar. Unheard of. Beyond impressed. Hell would freeze over before they did that in NYC

See, @Delta is delayed again, which means I'll just have more rum

See here's the thing. 100% of airport workers in the Bahamas are the happiest people alive. 100% of airport workers in JFK or LGA are cunts

Quiznos and drink. We getting hamskies. -Mal https://t.co/oI75teczI4

What I don't miss is my boy Franzel at the resort who flat out refused to shake my mojitos and I straight up drank full rum/sour on bottom

RT @BarstoolJJ: .@Delta my wife's birth control is in our bags you sent to San Diego. If we have a baby you're paying for it. https://t.co/…

@KFCBarstool the Mets poop in your shoes

Mal's being all mad at me for dissing iPhones but guess who was able to connect to the wifi? My android ass. Not her iPhone.

iPhones are silly. When connecting to public wifi, they don't let you edit the signin page. Android does, thus I connected and Mal didn't