9538 tweets posted from Twitter for Android
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@EngineerJusti My friend's puppy got loose and I chased it down the street for like 4 minutes and was dead for like an hour. I need to get into better shape. Running was never my thing. I can walk forever Sunday, May 21, 2023 9:19:26 AMTwitter for Android
@elonmusk Dude's on another planet rn
In reply to @elonmusk's tweet
Friday, May 19, 2023 1:21:24 AMTwitter for Android
America folks! Where cute white lady cops get pulled over street racing 100 in a 65, drunk af, and get most charges dropped for reasonable price of a $150 fine.

If this was a black officer, they'd have been liable to get shot at or choked 🤦‍♂️

https://t.co/ry3jrDnd9X 		Friday, May 19, 2023 1:20:59 AMTwitter for Android
Put this decrepit old senator out to pasture. I don't care how good you were or not in the past, if youre too frail to do your job, gtfo

Was I too harsh?

https://t.co/4YE8mvY3kG 		Friday, May 19, 2023 12:31:13 AMTwitter for Android
This kid is a frickin nerdy weener. Get over it and let people do whatever they want.

https://t.co/uHenqBwKoT 		Sunday, May 14, 2023 5:16:19 PMTwitter for Android
@RepMTG There's no apostrophe s in "just like the Bidens" you dummy
In reply to @RepMTG's tweet
Friday, May 12, 2023 1:52:19 AMTwitter for Android
@GregAbbott_TX It's a TOP state for the grid to fold over, to control women's bodies, for gun violence. You useless jokeshop

Your legs are fine and your gd brain is handicapped
In reply to @GregAbbott_TX's tweet
Wednesday, May 10, 2023 10:20:20 AMTwitter for Android
@_sysengineer Need to reboot the homelab again
In reply to @_sysengineer's tweet
Monday, May 08, 2023 8:10:01 PMTwitter for Android
@Eric_Conn Bruh. Let women wear whatever the hell they want. It's a free country. The conservative.way: "Don't tread on me, unless you're female or not white"
In reply to @Eric_Conn's tweet
Monday, May 08, 2023 8:09:03 PMTwitter for Android
I wonder why everyone gets cancer young

https://t.co/toAIaMr6bJ 		Sunday, May 07, 2023 11:50:12 AMTwitter for Android
I am dumb scrolling through TikTok lives and there are like 10 different lives about flat earths.

We are doomed as a society. Send a comet to just wipe us all out. Society peaked 		Sunday, May 07, 2023 12:42:53 AMTwitter for Android
So poison the MFer. I recommend radioactive pilonium https://t.co/r2pFakfNpl Saturday, May 06, 2023 6:59:08 PMTwitter for Android
Google fucking sucks over here. All this shit fails on the reg. My Google assistant answers about 25% of the time. A totally buggy pile of shit company lately. Jesus christ get your shit together https://t.co/kcF7ERFs86 Saturday, May 06, 2023 4:43:55 PMTwitter for Android
@crisisofconsc I had a first gen surfacebook. It rocked a dual core Intel cpu. DUAL Core... in like 2015. My phone at the time had more cores. It was so bad.
In reply to @crisisofconsc's tweet
Saturday, May 06, 2023 1:43:30 AMTwitter for Android
No one gives a shit about King Charles' coronation. Dude had his wife killed ffs Saturday, May 06, 2023 1:38:36 AMTwitter for Android
@Glenarama @madebygoogle They're all buggy pieces of shit. None of my home hubs are working right now. It's a fucking embarrassment.
In reply to @Glenarama's tweet
Friday, May 05, 2023 10:03:45 PMTwitter for Android
Hey Sundar. Fuck ya pay raise. Google products are buggy as shit. Company is in decline. Why you deserve more money for while all of us povos are suffering from severe inflation?

https://t.co/2NqNrBNyCq 		Friday, May 05, 2023 7:56:04 PMTwitter for Android
If you still work at Twitter and believe Elon's lies, you're an absolute FOOL

https://t.co/oM7mBOo9FB 		Friday, May 05, 2023 1:12:35 AMTwitter for Android
@rex197878 What a dumb southern hick bumpkin lmfao
In reply to @rex197878's tweet
Friday, May 05, 2023 12:49:29 AMTwitter for Android
@madebygoogle @rosterloh bruh
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 10:56:51 PMTwitter for Android
@madebygoogle This is literally the user experience I see. Rather than "Sorry, we don't support Gen 1 Nest doorbells yet. Check back soon!" https://t.co/SL8spvmv2l
In reply to @madebygoogle's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 10:56:12 PMTwitter for Android
@RepMTG Shut up Marjorie you crazy lady
In reply to @RepMTG's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 3:50:22 PMTwitter for Android
@libsoftiktok @MiddleboroughPS This kid is being groomed by the extreme right wing crazies.
In reply to @libsoftiktok's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 3:48:25 PMTwitter for Android
@madebygoogle So you'll buy me a new best doorbell when the old app is killed off, right?
In reply to @madebygoogle's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 3:47:22 PMTwitter for Android
@EricRichards22 Lmao. This defines Google to a tee. Half bake a product. Keep it beta for 10 years, replace it 2-3 times without feature parity, and then kill it off
In reply to @EricRichards22's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 3:44:56 PMTwitter for Android
@madebygoogle What if I have a 1st gen Nest Video Doorbell? I was just told by support chat last night that it isn't supported on the Google Home app.
In reply to @madebygoogle's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 3:14:08 PMTwitter for Android
@googlenesthelp @sandmid89 I love how Google is deprecating the Nest App for Google home and in the process they're both buggy as hell
In reply to @googlenesthelp's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 1:37:16 PMTwitter for Android
@jrfrank @googlenest This is happening to me too. Someone needs to fix this ASAP. It's been terrible lately
In reply to @jrfrank's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 1:28:07 PMTwitter for Android
@notrichben @googlenesthelp Nest camera feeds have been a gd piece of shit lately. Delayed notifications. Nest app video feed hardly loads, and the timeline doesn't show events. And it's totally broken in Google Home (which used to work but support told me isn't supported anymore)

This is horse shit
In reply to @notrichben's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 1:25:58 PMTwitter for Android
@madebygoogle It's within line of sight to the router. I am in tech and have a good wifi setup. It's not signal. I rebooted my nest Hubs. But haven't tried anything today. I'll keep you posted
In reply to @madebygoogle's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 1:22:38 PMTwitter for Android
@endingwithali I got a pair of jnco jorts from elementary school in 1998 that legit still fit me
In reply to @endingwithali's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 1:02:47 PMTwitter for Android
@guyday77 @SawyerMerritt @elonmusk @WallStreetSilv @jackiesnews This is a dying demographic. Boomers ruined the planet and made conditions shitty for millennials and Gen Z and it's time for them to go
In reply to @guyday77's tweet
Sunday, April 30, 2023 9:58:03 AMTwitter for Android
Some of the best Italian restaurants in NY are owned by Albanians and have a kitchen full of Mexicans Sunday, April 30, 2023 9:50:57 AMTwitter for Android
Dear Abby? You expect this guy to feel any sympathy? She can literally go eat dicks https://t.co/Nno7YrXIGs Saturday, April 29, 2023 9:14:10 PMTwitter for Android
@madebygoogle In the US and it's honestly always been buggy but I'd say about a week. It works intermittently.
In reply to @madebygoogle's tweet
Saturday, April 29, 2023 5:07:55 PMTwitter for Android
Like does anyone who works on these actually use them? They are enraging to use. I'm about to throw them all out my window
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Saturday, April 29, 2023 3:04:14 PMTwitter for Android
@madebygoogle what is your deal with Google Assistant the past few days? It hasn't been listening to anything I've been saying on any of my Nest Hubs. It can't even stop music without "there was a glitch" or " something went wrong"
In reply to @madebygoogle's tweet
Saturday, April 29, 2023 3:03:25 PMTwitter for Android
Sticks and stones break bones
But the gat will kill ya quicker
'specially if you live in America 		Thursday, April 27, 2023 11:29:32 PMTwitter for Android
Thi antique kind of has a really good point https://t.co/ykrDTANbF0 Tuesday, April 25, 2023 10:35:27 AMTwitter for Android
@_sysengineer Ma'am. Lay off the benadryl
In reply to @_sysengineer's tweet
Monday, April 24, 2023 7:09:39 PMTwitter for Android
Doc Robinson covered it better: https://t.co/v8qBwGXbhH

https://t.co/IDiMENC33K 		Sunday, April 23, 2023 12:06:59 PMTwitter for Android
I'm so hard rn

https://t.co/8piggTOGVu 		Saturday, April 22, 2023 10:09:12 PMTwitter for Android
@CovfefeChan @elonmusk You have to be outside of your bird to consider even paying lunatic Elon that much money. Sorry for your loss. Don't pay for this garbage.
In reply to @CovfefeChan's tweet
Saturday, April 22, 2023 11:07:20 AMTwitter for Android
@DelCoSheriff These replies are absurd. It's never okay to steal. Yes, it's a crappy puppy mill chain, I'd never shop pets there, but that doesn't make it right to just steal. Hope they're caught.
In reply to @DelCoSheriff's tweet
Friday, April 21, 2023 9:03:19 PMTwitter for Android
This screamed "fat white middle aged guy" and I was 10000000% correct

https://t.co/vVuAnPT1II 		Friday, April 21, 2023 12:44:16 AMTwitter for Android
These dummies. I've been saying this for fucking years.

https://t.co/LaVm0EzKh9 		Friday, April 21, 2023 12:34:06 AMTwitter for Android
@TerranceAvleen @LivePDDave1 @MattWallace888 What? https://t.co/wCD84A7IQ0 Friday, April 14, 2023 11:42:14 PMTwitter for Android
@Lenovo I've got a T14 brick because your shitty bios update flashing tool failed.

I lost data and look like an asshole at work.

No worries. It's my work laptop and IT has it handled. It's under warranty anyway so nothing you "try turning it on and off again" people can help with
In reply to @Lenovo's tweet
Friday, April 14, 2023 11:08:06 PMTwitter for Android
@heyitsylan It's okay. I'll take slow over brick. Literally just bricked my work laptop with a failed bios update.
In reply to @heyitsylan's tweet
Thursday, April 13, 2023 12:29:06 PMTwitter for Android
@ne39108342 @krassenstein Anheuser Busch really got all the right wing nut jobs' panties in a bunch. Lol.
In reply to @ne39108342's tweet
Thursday, April 13, 2023 12:18:46 PMTwitter for Android
@krassenstein To hell with Rupert Murdoch. The world will be better off when these antique boomers are no longer around
In reply to @krassenstein's tweet
Thursday, April 13, 2023 12:17:39 PMTwitter for Android
This is my work laptop. I don't know if I have my bitlocker key and this probably set me back a month you God damn assholes. Don't you test this shit
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Thursday, April 13, 2023 12:14:47 PMTwitter for Android
Fucking @Lenovo. I have a T14 gen 1 and whatever fucking bios update you pushed through vantage bricked my god damn laptop Thursday, April 13, 2023 12:13:53 PMTwitter for Android
@endingwithali Splunk
In reply to @endingwithali's tweet
Tuesday, April 11, 2023 2:47:43 PMTwitter for Android
@EngineerJusti Not a boop noodle? Sunday, April 09, 2023 5:42:55 PMTwitter for Android
Jfc. We won't be able to advance as a society until all the gd boomers are gone Sunday, April 09, 2023 5:42:02 PMTwitter for Android
@_sysengineer Ffs. This is how I clean. I'm so scattered that it takes forever and I get a million steps because I don't put things away that belong together. Worse than a fragmented spinny harddrive
In reply to @_sysengineer's tweet
Saturday, April 08, 2023 2:05:16 AMTwitter for Android
@robfnunn The far right believes in restricting women's rights because they want more white babies. It's as simple as that
In reply to @robfnunn's tweet
Sunday, April 02, 2023 8:10:56 PMTwitter for Android
@elonmusk @unusual_whales People are choosing not to have kids because it's not affordable you billionaire nitwit. What tf do you know about the struggles of common Americans?
In reply to @elonmusk's tweet
Sunday, April 02, 2023 8:09:17 PMTwitter for Android
Jesus Christ Mike Stanton (I call him Mike, not Giancarlo). Grounds into a double play with the bases loaded to lose like an asshole and not give me any fantasy points Saturday, April 01, 2023 7:21:22 PMTwitter for Android
I love how after all the batshit things Trump did, they finally get him on paying hush money to a stripper.

The extreme right is calling it a political witch hunt. It probably is, but maybe if he wasn't such a shit person, they'd leave him be. 		Friday, March 31, 2023 8:38:14 AMTwitter for Android
@MicrosoftEdge The new bing button and bar is ugly
In reply to @MicrosoftEdge's tweet
Thursday, March 23, 2023 7:37:39 PMTwitter for Android
Fuck a curved screen. I cracked two Pixel 6 Pro displays because the corners stick out of my case like an asshole.

https://t.co/fpR5qc6qXM 		Wednesday, March 22, 2023 12:22:13 AMTwitter for Android
@GovRonDeSantis Bruh. Don't you have more pressing matters to attend to, ffs. Smoke a gd blunt and chill out https://t.co/SpHsMvz9Rh
In reply to @GovRonDeSantis's tweet
Sunday, March 19, 2023 10:56:12 PMTwitter for Android
@_sysengineer https://t.co/uYAvN6yPzj
In reply to @_sysengineer's tweet
Friday, March 17, 2023 9:37:34 AMTwitter for Android
@MicrosoftEdge @sitnslay That new Bing sidebar in Edge is fugly.

It looks like IE in 2002 when people installed ActiveX spyware
In reply to @MicrosoftEdge's tweet
Thursday, March 16, 2023 7:50:07 PMTwitter for Android
@endingwithali @trashh_dev Fuck JavaScript and typescript and npm in the a
In reply to @endingwithali's tweet
Wednesday, March 15, 2023 12:15:54 AMTwitter for Android
I'm Ubering from the concert to the pizza place in Astoria. God Bless New York City Wednesday, March 15, 2023 12:12:54 AMTwitter for Android
New York's a fierce bitch Wednesday, March 15, 2023 12:06:59 AMTwitter for Android
NYC is great. I'm drinking in a cab rn Tuesday, March 14, 2023 7:27:33 PMTwitter for Android
They're gonna keep this piece of shit in prison for life and feed and house him? He's not worth the money
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Monday, March 13, 2023 8:17:50 PMTwitter for Android
What do you mean the jury is divided... Unalive this mfer

https://t.co/CzoduGOVbV 		Monday, March 13, 2023 8:16:10 PMTwitter for Android
Can I at least go on a rollercoaster after waiting this long?
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, March 12, 2023 4:28:07 PMTwitter for Android
This can suck it the most. This is why I only shop at night. I dislike people
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, March 12, 2023 4:27:30 PMTwitter for Android
The Costco checkout line is all the way to the back of the store and if I see any closed registers when I get up there, I'm'a shake a bitch Sunday, March 12, 2023 4:26:03 PMTwitter for Android
How about you go put a content warning on Elon's crusty asshole https://t.co/Rl3M5NrNdP Thursday, March 09, 2023 7:21:33 PMTwitter for Android
Hahahaaaaa. Fuck you Larry Householder ya bag of dicks https://t.co/fRHVmj5id6 Thursday, March 09, 2023 7:19:22 PMTwitter for Android
Plastic blows. Time to start making corn plastic instead

https://t.co/9STEgErjmS 		Wednesday, March 08, 2023 8:11:04 PMTwitter for Android
Yo @Walgreens. You wimpy ass mothertruckers cave to 20 Republican Attorneys general and pull mifepristone off the shelves? Ya know.. the "don't tread on me" party, telling women what to do with their bodies because there aren't enough white babies being born anymore. Tuesday, March 07, 2023 10:22:32 PMTwitter for Android
@_sysengineer Ohio sans
In reply to @_sysengineer's tweet
Tuesday, March 07, 2023 10:12:30 PMTwitter for Android
@crisisofconsc @crankysysad But are they M1 Macs or Intel?
In reply to @crisisofconsc's tweet
Saturday, March 04, 2023 8:26:38 PMTwitter for Android
I'm sorry, but I just saw this again, and it should be an immediate fireable offense. Like if you're this much of an idiot, you shouldn't be an engineer. https://t.co/PDWSofvYNb Saturday, March 04, 2023 8:22:51 PMTwitter for Android
ChatGPT is an actual riot. https://t.co/beEhy7BRWI Saturday, March 04, 2023 8:05:15 PMTwitter for Android
"Global warming is fake. This is totally normal" https://t.co/pCxtIMh8KP Tuesday, February 28, 2023 9:09:28 AMTwitter for Android
@fitbit This is really bad UX. "Irregular rhythm notifications" makes it seem like it detected a problem. It is very alarming to see, only to tap into it to see "no notifications"

It should say if it detected anything or not right on the banner.

This is the Android app... https://t.co/st0wKsLSRE
In reply to @fitbit's tweet
Saturday, February 18, 2023 11:21:40 PMTwitter for Android
I will again reiterate that plastic is the worst invention of all time

https://t.co/3r0KsjoBX9 		Saturday, February 18, 2023 11:39:47 AMTwitter for Android
@impatienceisav1 @jneset @_sysengineer @WaterDoctorsMN Is your whole house pre filter a water softener?
In reply to @impatienceisav1's tweet
Monday, February 13, 2023 7:40:25 PMTwitter for Android
@AnkerOfficial I really like Anker products but my Q30 Headset snapped as I was putting it on and it completely fell apart. I don't treat it rough and I would say 6 months of use is not enough for wear and tear. I really can't see spending $80 on another pair. What can you do?
In reply to @AnkerOfficial's tweet
Sunday, February 12, 2023 7:22:24 PMTwitter for Android
@RepMTG How the fuck should you know, you Kool aid drinking buffoon
In reply to @RepMTG's tweet
Sunday, February 05, 2023 2:40:46 PMTwitter for Android
Eat a dick, David. @DaveYostOH

https://t.co/UJiAp0ASbS 		Thursday, February 02, 2023 6:12:32 PMTwitter for Android
Walmart always attracts really interesting creatures. Doesn't matter where it is located. Could be the wealthiest area or the hood... Regardless, you run into some real critters out there Tuesday, January 24, 2023 9:27:30 PMTwitter for Android
If this is actually true about George Santos, and how he scammed money in the name of helping a dog, he needs to immediately be put foot first through the wood chipper

https://t.co/jK4DshtYtI 		Monday, January 23, 2023 11:48:31 AMTwitter for Android
Test to see if Elon removed the tweet source from the API. I doubt it. Monday, January 16, 2023 3:31:11 PMTwitter for Android
Jfc. We're like a week away from deploying new infra to prod and the dude that wrote all the new logic moved teams. We just realized he missed a major workflow and now I'm down the rabbit hole of all kinds of jacked up bullshit, and it's all in typescript and I'm a gd nooblet Thursday, January 12, 2023 1:54:46 PMTwitter for Android
Get the fuck out of here with this shit. 1) maybe if we didn't use so many gd pesticides and chemicals, people wouldn't develop so many allergies

2) Now companies are making unnecessary changes to food to align to some stupid ass law

https://t.co/hi5NF9fdNm (ps fox news sux) 		Tuesday, January 10, 2023 2:07:26 PMTwitter for Android
Only in America. This little shit did this intentionally? Tf are the parents? Where'd the gun come from? Put him through the wood chipper, idgaf he's a kid, he's a psycho who will only cause society probs in the future

https://t.co/oFbzAui5Vn 		Sunday, January 08, 2023 8:25:42 AMTwitter for Android
Tf do they call a sled a sledge in the UK. Weirdos Sunday, January 01, 2023 4:57:39 PMTwitter for Android
Tf would @madebygoogle send me this when I literally just bought a Versa 4 on the Google Store a few weeks ago.

Literally do better. You have the data. Don't be dipshits. Idk why this annoyed me so much https://t.co/XesYigicgN 		Sunday, January 01, 2023 3:57:19 PMTwitter for Android
Also. Ain't no way shaggy is 54. Player doesn't look a day over 36 Sunday, January 01, 2023 12:16:56 AMTwitter for Android
Shaggy's performing rn so 2023 off to a good start Sunday, January 01, 2023 12:15:27 AMTwitter for Android