9538 tweets posted from Twitter for Android
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I don't think you understand the magnitude of the man crush i have on Dave Robertson... Sunday, April 15, 2012 10:47:28 PMTwitter for Android
Didn't get to have any loco d'reets today. Bunch of bullshit Saturday, April 14, 2012 2:13:04 AMTwitter for Android
The mother fuckin purple ass. Holy shit. Its prime Friday, April 13, 2012 11:58:11 PMTwitter for Android
"Them playas is fuckin'" Friday, April 13, 2012 10:37:55 PMTwitter for Android
"Dazzz why you say what you sayyy" -D Money. Friday, April 13, 2012 9:39:40 PMTwitter for Android
That's a tax shot! Friday, April 13, 2012 9:38:11 PMTwitter for Android
@__JLu speaking of Linux I have a cloud server running a nessus scan using 6 gigs of bandwidth that my boss told me to shut off that I didnt
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
Friday, April 13, 2012 9:31:06 PMTwitter for Android
"You're not a tax doin' fuckin person." -Derick Friday, April 13, 2012 9:29:24 PMTwitter for Android
Almost fell asleep standing up on the subway. Started to collapse, woke up and made a weird jerky motion. Nice Thursday, April 12, 2012 7:28:47 PMTwitter for Android
RT @DEVOPS_BORAT: After 3 beer I can able use any of cloud API. Thursday, April 12, 2012 6:47:14 PMTwitter for Android
You know.... just a homeless dude blow drying his socks in the Grand Central bathrooms. NBD Thursday, April 12, 2012 6:45:52 PMTwitter for Android
There are some fucking whackjobs on this train. Real winners. Singing out loud, making ridic comments. Jeez Wednesday, April 11, 2012 10:38:45 PMTwitter for Android
This show is killing me. Tuesday, April 10, 2012 11:18:53 PMTwitter for Android
Mama's boys of the Bronx is fuckin hysterical Tuesday, April 10, 2012 11:08:07 PMTwitter for Android
I must find Donald Trump's assistant Amanda and potato sack her. Tuesday, April 10, 2012 12:22:02 AMTwitter for Android
@nyJULZmd I will not fear your dog. Your dog is obsessed with me.
In reply to @nyJULZmd's tweet
Monday, April 09, 2012 8:18:42 PMTwitter for Android
RT @DadBoner: It's days like these, when I realize that some people don't like me, they can get a fat middle finger in their face. Hard ... Sunday, April 08, 2012 5:15:52 PMTwitter for Android
@MalJNew how do you know. I thought you'd be passed out by now.
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
Sunday, April 08, 2012 3:37:57 PMTwitter for Android
@mich_amore I mean... I'd like your instagram pic, but someone hasn't accepted my follow request.
In reply to @mich_amore's tweet
Sunday, April 08, 2012 12:59:50 PMTwitter for Android
I've come to the conclusion that my twitter is the most ridiculous thing in existence Saturday, April 07, 2012 12:56:02 PMTwitter for Android
Asian kid: y u do linear algebra on the drunk train home Saturday, April 07, 2012 1:00:51 AMTwitter for Android
Once again , fuck the MTA in the ass. Not only is this a short ass train to begin with, but they have 4 cars closed off for no reason. Saturday, April 07, 2012 12:54:11 AMTwitter for Android
These two are banging tonight. So hard. I can tell Friday, April 06, 2012 11:19:52 PMTwitter for Android
Oh mikey. Dude will never steer me wrong. Love that bro. I need a permanent gay to help me out with the fuckin women. Friday, April 06, 2012 8:47:41 PMTwitter for Android
@Novellabella fuckin joker
In reply to @Novellabella's tweet
Friday, April 06, 2012 8:40:13 PMTwitter for Android
@nyJULZmd not a fan? Come over and hang with me instead
In reply to @nyJULZmd's tweet
Friday, April 06, 2012 8:39:50 PMTwitter for Android
Christina is my favorite lesbian of all time. Id marry her every time in a game of marry fuck kill every day of the week and twice on sunday Friday, April 06, 2012 7:57:03 PMTwitter for Android
@dannyrob88 suck it
In reply to @dannyrob88's tweet
Friday, April 06, 2012 7:32:28 PMTwitter for Android
fuck the yes network for not hiring jenny dell Friday, April 06, 2012 6:33:35 PMTwitter for Android
Dave Robertson.... God damn it. Stop sucking it if you want to ever replace Mo. I would've been gay for you but you have 2 men on 0 out. Smd Friday, April 06, 2012 6:23:49 PMTwitter for Android
Opening day! Friday, April 06, 2012 3:20:37 PMTwitter for Android
my socks have the Portfolioso logo on them. Haaaaa http://t.co/sNwyUVr Thursday, April 05, 2012 11:51:13 PMTwitter for Android
According to Elise, Jesus was stoned to death. Lawlz Thursday, April 05, 2012 7:43:23 PMTwitter for Android
Had a dream that I had a threesome at my boss' house and he was pissed at me. Thursday, April 05, 2012 8:10:23 AMTwitter for Android
So is drinking out of a glass jar with a straw through a hole drilled in the lid supposed to be cool these days? F'in hipsters. Thursday, April 05, 2012 8:08:25 AMTwitter for Android
Whoa... Since when is it Thursday? Where'd this week go? Thursday, April 05, 2012 2:50:01 AMTwitter for Android
I love how I get stuck on a train next to a guy with a shit ass. Theres also sewer problems here. Wednesday, April 04, 2012 7:06:44 PMTwitter for Android
Oh the MTA is just winning for two weeks straight. 4/5 delays, 7million people and now signal problems. Worthless Wednesday, April 04, 2012 7:05:29 PMTwitter for Android
Whoever keeps shitting their pants on this train... Fucking stop it. Wednesday, April 04, 2012 6:58:11 PMTwitter for Android
@ky9 if course I would get it instantly. Now I can be like those hipster Apple fanboy photographer wannabes
In reply to @ky9's tweet
Tuesday, April 03, 2012 7:17:58 PMTwitter for Android
This lenscrafters girl is a certified smokeshow Tuesday, April 03, 2012 3:05:37 PMTwitter for Android
RT @DadBoner: When you josh around about puttin your quarters in a another man's lady bank, be prepared to have your mind destroyed, man ... Tuesday, April 03, 2012 12:28:14 AMTwitter for Android
RT @DEVOPS_BORAT: In devops we are never assign blame, we are just try of find out how the fuck it happen. Monday, April 02, 2012 11:36:49 PMTwitter for Android
No winder this depressing ass place is closing shame Monday, April 02, 2012 8:32:46 PMTwitter for Android
@MalJNew: "it smells like a swimming pool when I sneeze and I kinda like it" Monday, April 02, 2012 7:04:26 PMTwitter for Android
Yeah two pitchers of bud heavy in like 20 mins. Rough Monday, April 02, 2012 6:49:47 PMTwitter for Android
I guess I'll go to a last min andrew wk concert Monday, April 02, 2012 6:39:39 PMTwitter for Android
@VtotheFlo ironic of you to retweet that. Don't you brag about how classy you are nonstop? Sunday, April 01, 2012 9:20:16 PMTwitter for Android
@Novellabella Just... no comment. I could go anywhere with that one.
In reply to @Novellabella's tweet
Sunday, April 01, 2012 4:23:39 PMTwitter for Android
My twitter... jeez Saturday, March 31, 2012 1:47:44 PMTwitter for Android
But I'm into others though..m hahahah Friday, March 30, 2012 10:30:36 PMTwitter for Android
I would have slapped Elise's ass so hard but she's on to me... gotta keep a low profile. Even though she likes it. Friday, March 30, 2012 10:30:01 PMTwitter for Android
Marry fuck kill with Lennon and Niraj is fuckin classic Friday, March 30, 2012 9:18:14 PMTwitter for Android
I mean. She's a cool dude. But shed fall apart like a book of matches Friday, March 30, 2012 9:15:40 PMTwitter for Android
Those right there are what they call dick wrecking boots Friday, March 30, 2012 9:08:19 AMTwitter for Android
This old bag on the train is bragging about how he partied in South Beach last week. Nasty Friday, March 30, 2012 8:08:19 AMTwitter for Android
Dude on the train has a shiny new ultrabook and his IT morons downgraded it to Win XP. What a waste. Monday, March 26, 2012 8:06:22 AMTwitter for Android
Draw Something: y u cause kernel panics and force reboot my phone? Monday, March 26, 2012 8:02:33 AMTwitter for Android
Holy shit! A Panera opened in Manhattan? It's about time! Sunday, March 25, 2012 11:23:40 PMTwitter for Android
@Novellabella There are no notifications in that app
In reply to @Novellabella's tweet
Sunday, March 25, 2012 11:20:28 PMTwitter for Android
No wonder haymitch hits the bottle. If I were in his sitch, I'd be an alcoholic mess myself too, not that I aren't already Sunday, March 25, 2012 3:13:48 AMTwitter for Android
If u were him I'd be out my mind nonstop Sunday, March 25, 2012 12:50:23 AMTwitter for Android
No wonder haymitch is a mother fuckin alcoholic Sunday, March 25, 2012 12:49:40 AMTwitter for Android
Peppermint schnapps? Tastes like Christmas?! Saturday, March 24, 2012 11:39:43 PMTwitter for Android
Keith to me about lessard: "Ask him who won the Superbowl, then take tour dick out." Saturday, March 24, 2012 10:53:19 PMTwitter for Android
The other gay thinks my flawless logic is fine. Shit... who's right? Saturday, March 24, 2012 5:28:45 PMTwitter for Android
@nyJULZmd cum to NYC and drink with me all day
In reply to @nyJULZmd's tweet
Saturday, March 24, 2012 4:46:26 PMTwitter for Android
I'm all about the yellow Saturday, March 24, 2012 4:41:25 PMTwitter for Android
Okayyyyyyy. One gay thinks my flawless logic is flawed... time to ask another Saturday, March 24, 2012 4:18:54 PMTwitter for Android
This: http://t.co/l4PZEu9 Saturday, March 24, 2012 3:27:05 PMTwitter for Android
So when is Katniss gonna get Eiffel towered by Gale and Peeta? Saturday, March 24, 2012 3:04:27 PMTwitter for Android
These Fordham girls on this train are out of control Saturday, March 24, 2012 12:31:09 PMTwitter for Android
I need this dudes moves. Mad swag. Get mad bitches. Friday, March 23, 2012 11:11:31 PMTwitter for Android
Yeah. So about this jello shot girl. Friday, March 23, 2012 11:02:39 PMTwitter for Android
"You've got a girlfriend." "Doesn't mean I can't eat popcorn from her titties" Friday, March 23, 2012 10:37:07 PMTwitter for Android
I have discernment. Whenever I suspect something, its 100% true Friday, March 23, 2012 9:53:37 PMTwitter for Android
This band is NOT covering pearl jam. This is sick Friday, March 23, 2012 9:45:50 PMTwitter for Android
I'd bet my dick and both balls that I'm going to lose internet between crestwood and scarsdale Wednesday, March 21, 2012 9:34:30 PMTwitter for Android
@tomwcleary's twitter: pretty much sums up how much of a shithole Bridgeport is. Wednesday, March 21, 2012 12:33:32 AMTwitter for Android
RT @DEVOPS_BORAT: In devops we are always have quiet celebration when server is come back up after reboot. Monday, March 19, 2012 3:47:22 PMTwitter for Android
RT @ElBloombito: Mucho warmo en el outsideo. Go ridero un bicycleo (pero only on el patho del bikero y el streeto. No el sidewalk!) Monday, March 19, 2012 3:47:06 PMTwitter for Android
City is absolutely mobbed Saturday, March 17, 2012 11:27:35 AMTwitter for Android
why Saturday, March 17, 2012 12:32:37 AMTwitter for Android
My boss is still at the bar with us... lolz Saturday, March 17, 2012 12:15:36 AMTwitter for Android
Piece of hair in your mouth.... omg. Take me home Saturday, March 17, 2012 12:14:36 AMTwitter for Android
Oh and I'd bang either girl on the swung right now... pref a threesome. hhhhhh Friday, March 16, 2012 11:33:13 PMTwitter for Android
Idk who bit my nip but all's I know is that I need to take a body shot off of elise Friday, March 16, 2012 11:32:20 PMTwitter for Android
Bahahahah pussy assed bouncer kept thinking I'd fall off the swing on the bar..... guy doesn't know my upper body swag Friday, March 16, 2012 11:25:32 PMTwitter for Android
god damn it @MalJNew stop getting lipstick on my boss... guy is a classy gentlemen. Fuckin homewrecker... doesn't even cheat. Bunch of bs Friday, March 16, 2012 11:05:14 PMTwitter for Android
Sooooo. When I'm Sam's age.... I Better be as much of a baller as he is... wife and all... total baller. Struttin that ass. Friday, March 16, 2012 10:35:25 PMTwitter for Android
Elise is fucking wild. I'm into this. I'm gonna dance on the bar with her later.... Friday, March 16, 2012 9:07:33 PMTwitter for Android
Also @MalJNew just heard the phrase "shit happens when you party naked" for the first time tonight. I remember when I was 17. Friday, March 16, 2012 8:06:18 PMTwitter for Android
I mean... hot Irish tap dancers on the bar aren't terrible right now Friday, March 16, 2012 8:04:45 PMTwitter for Android
SO TRUE: @DEVOPS_BORAT: Almost finish new command line utility 'gtfo' for roll out cloud instance quick. Thursday, March 15, 2012 6:58:38 PMTwitter for Android
RT @ElBloombito: Cuidado! Los Ides de Marcho! Thursday, March 15, 2012 1:00:02 AMTwitter for Android
@kellyomealia @scoopANDslam you both play too? I think I disconnected it from my fb so its hard to find me. Same username as here for me
In reply to @kellyomealia's tweet
Thursday, March 15, 2012 12:51:22 AMTwitter for Android
Thank you FiOS for going down right in the middle if me needing the internet for everything Wednesday, March 14, 2012 10:29:35 PMTwitter for Android
Bring me Trump's assistant Amanda. Tuesday, March 13, 2012 1:02:06 AMTwitter for Android
The Donald ripping on ARod. Hahah Tuesday, March 13, 2012 12:32:43 AMTwitter for Android
I need to hire a personal physician... when I'm out drankin and come home, I get a saline IV... wake up hydrated and not hungover... Sunday, March 11, 2012 10:33:03 AMTwitter for Android