9538 tweets posted from Twitter for Android
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Gotta love the geeky flyers in the shitter at Google... http://t.co/oxGhaGrLsg Monday, April 29, 2013 7:14:49 PMTwitter for Android
Frankie: "Dan. You either take a picture with Joe or I floss your teeth" Sunday, April 28, 2013 7:58:45 PMTwitter for Android
Fuck. We're alcoholics. No wonder I yacked http://t.co/cyserGbQ7T Saturday, April 27, 2013 11:40:01 PMTwitter for Android
Like your style, girl: "Oh no. No kids. Unless I pick one out and he's flawless" Saturday, April 27, 2013 3:59:20 PMTwitter for Android
Know what I miss when I was a kid? The Mover and I used to stay up late and watch the Yanks on the west coast and eat apple pie a la mode Saturday, April 27, 2013 3:42:27 PMTwitter for Android
My ego is larger than Mets runs allowed Saturday, April 27, 2013 2:51:14 PMTwitter for Android
#lolmets Ya kinda gotta feel bad for them. Saturday, April 27, 2013 2:47:26 PMTwitter for Android
#lolmets Saturday, April 27, 2013 1:57:09 PMTwitter for Android
"I hate the Mets, but I love this song" - Phillies fan Saturday, April 27, 2013 1:48:28 PMTwitter for Android
@mets Phillies fans are ugly Saturday, April 27, 2013 1:42:20 PMTwitter for Android
Cleary, you degenerate: "Oh shit. I forgot to bet on this fame. Now it won't be as fun." #loveit #bromance Saturday, April 27, 2013 1:18:49 PMTwitter for Android
I'm sorry but CitiField food is god damn baller Saturday, April 27, 2013 1:16:43 PMTwitter for Android
The combo of these strutting jeans and boxer briefs make it impossible to take a leak. Can't whip it out, you guys. And I'm drinking a lot. Saturday, April 27, 2013 1:15:24 PMTwitter for Android
Jim Dolan's in his suite licking lollipops and slut vajay Friday, April 26, 2013 10:44:38 PMTwitter for Android
RT @KFCBarstool: Cuncel Da Celtics Friday, April 26, 2013 10:33:19 PMTwitter for Android
MO is a mofuggin boss Friday, April 26, 2013 10:32:53 PMTwitter for Android
If the Celtics come back and win, Danny's gotta do a nakey lap Friday, April 26, 2013 9:18:11 PMTwitter for Android
I really need to blast one out right now and this cab isn't the greatest for it. Friday, April 26, 2013 12:39:10 AMTwitter for Android
I am Queens Boulevard Friday, April 26, 2013 12:36:38 AMTwitter for Android
Yo for real. I better be as hot as my boss in 10 years Thursday, April 25, 2013 10:53:37 PMTwitter for Android
Fuck. I just pulled a George Brett at the bar. Use your imagination Thursday, April 25, 2013 9:33:36 PMTwitter for Android
Silver fox is killing it with swagger over at this ping pong bar Thursday, April 25, 2013 8:47:01 PMTwitter for Android
@Lennon just show up and grab his junk
In reply to @Lennon's tweet
Thursday, April 25, 2013 5:41:51 PMTwitter for Android
Really looking forward to getting schloppy at the dev drink night, you guys. Thursday, April 25, 2013 5:29:15 PMTwitter for Android
I need to stop going to bed after 4am... Thursday, April 25, 2013 4:16:25 AMTwitter for Android
How dumb I am. I just had a panic attack because I thought I left my phone on Gabe's desk b/c we were testing. UM. I used my phone all night Thursday, April 25, 2013 12:01:28 AMTwitter for Android
When I think of the name Nigel, I think of an ugly assed British dude with rotten choppers. Wednesday, April 24, 2013 7:35:48 PMTwitter for Android
Cuntface behind me on the train: shut your speaking hole. You're screaming. Wednesday, April 24, 2013 6:37:15 PMTwitter for Android
Joe S thought it was all my monitors that raised the temp by my desk. He didn't realize it was me. #struttin #bitches Tuesday, April 23, 2013 3:09:46 PMTwitter for Android
Legit takes these elevators hours to show up. Tuesday, April 23, 2013 1:05:37 PMTwitter for Android
This is #strutfest 2013 Tuesday, April 23, 2013 8:12:00 AMTwitter for Android
Gonna strut dat ass to work tomorrow with ripped Diesels and a pink T-shirt. #bitches Tuesday, April 23, 2013 12:05:37 AMTwitter for Android
#bitches Monday, April 22, 2013 11:41:37 PMTwitter for Android
Maybe I'm a cocky douchebag, but I just looked in the mirror and realized how important I am. Monday, April 22, 2013 11:10:40 PMTwitter for Android
The aunties are excellent Monday, April 22, 2013 11:02:02 PMTwitter for Android
CCs pitching like ass Monday, April 22, 2013 7:58:21 PMTwitter for Android
This train operator is an absolute nooblet at aligning this train onto the walkway platforms. Shits taking mad hours. Sunday, April 21, 2013 9:53:56 PMTwitter for Android
THAT is what they call a lazy Sunday... Sunday, April 21, 2013 8:21:07 PMTwitter for Android
311 Pandora is chill as fuck Sunday, April 21, 2013 3:30:07 PMTwitter for Android
#shitnogirlsays This thing has too many diamonds on it. Sunday, April 21, 2013 4:34:09 AMTwitter for Android
Happy 420 to ya, you guys Saturday, April 20, 2013 8:53:30 PMTwitter for Android
Mals. Chest out. Be proud Saturday, April 20, 2013 8:24:18 PMTwitter for Android
B.I.G P.O.P.P.A Saturday, April 20, 2013 7:39:29 PMTwitter for Android
Nostalgia: I loved when I had trail bologna and Doritos for breakfast at Mals. Saturday, April 20, 2013 4:40:16 PMTwitter for Android
The fucking party bus was sitting there pumping saying what the fuck on the party bus. 42d st. Friday, April 19, 2013 10:07:49 PMTwitter for Android
Derick: "Joe's like- 'App 2 is down'" Friday, April 19, 2013 9:51:16 PMTwitter for Android
I'm like fuck it. I ain't losin shit over these bitches. Look at all these fucks I don't give. Friday, April 19, 2013 9:27:24 PMTwitter for Android
Up there. As much as round things. Friday, April 19, 2013 9:04:49 PMTwitter for Android
SILVER FOX is awesome Friday, April 19, 2013 7:39:49 PMTwitter for Android
I might have just accidentally pissed on my phone... Friday, April 19, 2013 2:46:56 PMTwitter for Android
I guess this is why my lowest score on my reviewbwas on professionalism.... Although I still met expectations. #bitches Friday, April 19, 2013 2:17:58 PMTwitter for Android
Realllll pumped that Tom Petty came on at the bar, you guys. You think I have time for another beer before I go back to work? Friday, April 19, 2013 2:07:57 PMTwitter for Android
Really Windows 8??? I haven't seen a computer look up that badly since Windows 98 Friday, April 19, 2013 1:35:24 AMTwitter for Android
Gary Busey cracked me the f up on last Sunday's Apprentice Thursday, April 18, 2013 11:52:00 PMTwitter for Android
@ky9 CHICKEN TURNOVA PLEES!! No Mike. Is Angelo!!
In reply to @ky9's tweet
Thursday, April 18, 2013 11:07:18 PMTwitter for Android
FiOS is being flaky right now... Thursday, April 18, 2013 10:22:22 PMTwitter for Android
RT @scoopANDslam: Everything is so fucking stupid. Wednesday, April 17, 2013 6:58:53 PMTwitter for Android
I'm switching off Verizon on the grounds that their 4G is ass in Manhattan. And they don't have Nexus phones Wednesday, April 17, 2013 1:46:53 PMTwitter for Android
This fuckin cop just diverted my cab way the fuck out of my way Tuesday, April 16, 2013 9:44:25 PMTwitter for Android
This piss just made me have to take a dog Tuesday, April 16, 2013 9:40:11 PMTwitter for Android
This dog just made me wanna take a piss Tuesday, April 16, 2013 9:39:44 PMTwitter for Android
Wtf is this DirecTV + viggle commercial I saw at the bar? Viggle? Vagiggle? Vagina? Huhhh? Confused Tuesday, April 16, 2013 9:21:16 PMTwitter for Android
@MalJNew: "Joe has this hot silver fox gay boss" Tuesday, April 16, 2013 9:06:50 PMTwitter for Android
Seriously Vincent.... Who smokes receipts? Tuesday, April 16, 2013 8:45:26 PMTwitter for Android
Struttin dat ass @MalJNew Tuesday, April 16, 2013 8:15:17 AMTwitter for Android
Looked in mirror. Am hot today Tuesday, April 16, 2013 7:52:30 AMTwitter for Android
Mmmm pizza for breakfast! Tuesday, April 16, 2013 7:44:47 AMTwitter for Android
Suits suck Monday, April 15, 2013 6:14:29 PMTwitter for Android
Lyle Overbay's at bat music is Nirvana? We're winning the series this year Saturday, April 13, 2013 6:42:39 PMTwitter for Android
#sayidoody Saturday, April 13, 2013 6:35:55 PMTwitter for Android
@Lessard_Eric @keith_connors @tomwcleary @jstanz37 I'll give you $100 if you steal the Jap flag Saturday, April 13, 2013 6:34:36 PMTwitter for Android
Hey Joe. Here's my phone. Call the bullpen. Saturday, April 13, 2013 5:09:45 PMTwitter for Android
Lol. Asian woman trying to parallel park Saturday, April 13, 2013 10:59:55 AMTwitter for Android
My boy Mohammed is back in his food cart and he's awesome! Friday, April 12, 2013 9:53:14 PMTwitter for Android
The fuck is this bullshit... Windows 8 equivalent of a BSOD http://t.co/xlFCBhywPF Friday, April 12, 2013 1:16:45 AMTwitter for Android
@__JLu lol caught me. Got drunk one day and bought that and didn't want to put my real info.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
Thursday, April 11, 2013 10:33:14 PMTwitter for Android
@portfolioso lol caught me. Got drunk one day and bought that and didn't want to put my real info.
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Thursday, April 11, 2013 10:30:54 PMTwitter for Android
I'm legit embarrassed to tweet what Aniusha is talkin about. And I'm nasty as fuck on twitter Thursday, April 11, 2013 9:11:36 PMTwitter for Android
The have waxing professors? Thursday, April 11, 2013 9:09:50 PMTwitter for Android
Aniusha keeps talking about waxing balls Thursday, April 11, 2013 9:09:34 PMTwitter for Android
Elise: "You know that cartoon the Smurfs? Doesn't she remind you of a white Smurf?" Thursday, April 11, 2013 8:12:33 PMTwitter for Android
If this chick wasn't in her 40s, she might have been hot. Tuesday, April 09, 2013 11:15:25 PMTwitter for Android
54-46 was my number was my number yeah Tuesday, April 09, 2013 11:05:46 PMTwitter for Android
OK this bastard either 1) dropped dead on the shitter or 2) is avoiding the fare. Fuck you. I'll piss on you. Tuesday, April 09, 2013 10:59:06 PMTwitter for Android
To whoever is taking a shit in the Metro North bathroom: I gotta piss, bastard. Get the fuck out. I'm more important than you. Tuesday, April 09, 2013 10:31:24 PMTwitter for Android
@MalJNew just pulled some Godfather shit. The hottest Tuesday, April 09, 2013 9:22:02 PMTwitter for Android
Overheard: "How can your flat assed face not be at McDonalds, bitch" Tuesday, April 09, 2013 9:14:07 PMTwitter for Android
@Lennon 1) You'll get your hug from whoever you want it from/me also 2) Let's get shitfaced at El Cantinero with the Velbs
In reply to @Lennon's tweet
Tuesday, April 09, 2013 9:09:56 PMTwitter for Android
Shit. Air drumming to AC/DC. You know I'm tips Tuesday, April 09, 2013 8:40:21 PMTwitter for Android
Yo Freddy. There's gotta be three dudes and someone's gotta wingman that shit Tuesday, April 09, 2013 8:30:55 PMTwitter for Android
Wisdom: "No ones got your back but you." Tuesday, April 09, 2013 8:23:42 PMTwitter for Android
If @MalJNew is a lesbian, that's fine. As long as her girl doesn't have short hair and they're down for a threesome, I'm down. Tuesday, April 09, 2013 8:19:06 PMTwitter for Android
The consensus is that Khodaja likes box Tuesday, April 09, 2013 8:15:15 PMTwitter for Android
Do you like when girls pee on you? Tuesday, April 09, 2013 7:54:31 PMTwitter for Android
"I just wanna drunkenly reply: 'I love you, marry me, have my babies'"- @MalJNew regarding my boss. Lol Tuesday, April 09, 2013 7:52:33 PMTwitter for Android
You know Cleveland sucks when even the Yankees can beat them... Tuesday, April 09, 2013 7:36:19 PMTwitter for Android
Stephie. How is that ass allowed at work. I'm sure that's somehow against the dress code. Tuesday, April 09, 2013 7:31:15 PMTwitter for Android
@jstanz37 I see what you did there...
In reply to @jstanz37's tweet
Tuesday, April 09, 2013 1:07:20 AMTwitter for Android
Barry's replacement has zero swagger. Monday, April 08, 2013 8:18:32 AMTwitter for Android
The end of an era. Barry really is gone. Noooooooooooo Monday, April 08, 2013 8:05:18 AMTwitter for Android