9538 tweets posted from Twitter for Android
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Outkast, yo Friday, June 06, 2014 9:43:03 PMTwitter for Android
Out on the streets they call.it murdaaaa! Friday, June 06, 2014 8:00:40 PMTwitter for Android
Not even shitting you. Damien looks exactly like Hughlon Friday, June 06, 2014 7:32:23 PMTwitter for Android
Face it. When you're at a Damien Marley concert, everyone is too stoned to know what's going on, you guys. Friday, June 06, 2014 7:16:06 PMTwitter for Android
Rastafari! Friday, June 06, 2014 6:56:38 PMTwitter for Android
Omg. About to see Damien Marley. 🎶 WELCOME TO JAMROCK 🎵 Friday, June 06, 2014 6:50:30 PMTwitter for Android
Who thought it was a good idea to shut down all Queens bound N Q R trains and do construction on the queensboro bridge Thursday, June 05, 2014 11:37:11 PMTwitter for Android
sent multiple emails to suits at my company saying they are wasting $5300/month on unused powered off servers. They don't care. #wutever Thursday, June 05, 2014 12:57:36 AMTwitter for Android
Hold the phone. Was Ja Rule really at orchard beach with j lo tonight, or are you guys just fucking with me? Bc I'd a been in that hood... Thursday, June 05, 2014 12:52:21 AMTwitter for Android
I'm not sure what Dashport does, but their landing page is pretty cool. http://t.co/4wy6UySXJC Thursday, June 05, 2014 12:45:55 AMTwitter for Android
RT @KFCBarstool: The Mets stink. Thursday, June 05, 2014 12:31:46 AMTwitter for Android
Fuckin a Wednesday, June 04, 2014 11:15:14 PMTwitter for Android
Pulled the recovery because Vinny fucked me over in quarter hockey and made me chug like 2 beers Wednesday, June 04, 2014 11:04:53 PMTwitter for Android
HENRIK with the saves Wednesday, June 04, 2014 10:51:31 PMTwitter for Android
Get up you fuckin pussy. Call yourself a hockey player? Wednesday, June 04, 2014 9:33:11 PMTwitter for Android
According to @BarstoolJJ , did Don Zimmer just kick it? Kinda bummed. Torre's sidekick. Wednesday, June 04, 2014 9:06:01 PMTwitter for Android
Goooooooooooooooool. (Ya I know this isn't soccer) water's on me! Wednesday, June 04, 2014 8:49:25 PMTwitter for Android
Not pleased that my beer is empty and I'm boxed in and can't order a new one. Wednesday, June 04, 2014 7:51:12 PMTwitter for Android
You're mistaken if you don't think I'm putting Mal's "You can't be a pimp and a prostitute too" White Stripes sticker on my work laptop. Sunday, June 01, 2014 2:16:27 PMTwitter for Android
Might have just gotten caught by a dog owner talking about his dogs titties. Sunday, June 01, 2014 12:44:22 PMTwitter for Android
I'm all about this drunk bus to the party in the hotel lobby Saturday, May 31, 2014 12:33:05 AMTwitter for Android
I am OK with these old ladies getting down to remix to ignition Friday, May 30, 2014 11:32:42 PMTwitter for Android
The amount of 90s techno at this wedding is making me happy Friday, May 30, 2014 11:25:43 PMTwitter for Android
Mal just said my tweets are just as bad as Bynes' were during her meltdown. I'm not that crazy, am I? Thursday, May 29, 2014 8:27:55 PMTwitter for Android
Whoever is driving this R train is a miserable fuckup who needs to learn how to brake without everyone wiping out. F- #mta Thursday, May 29, 2014 7:14:56 PMTwitter for Android
DBA manager with the rainbow keyboard keeps ripping ass up in this bitch. http://t.co/03GOKOhmmH Thursday, May 29, 2014 4:08:56 PMTwitter for Android
Verizon XLTE. Now faster upload speeds than Time Warner's turbo package that's $60/month http://t.co/ZbI0L9iuJG Thursday, May 29, 2014 12:33:17 PMTwitter for Android
Ear secks tho: http://t.co/VeGaP3T7Yd Thursday, May 29, 2014 12:02:43 AMTwitter for Android
@MalJNew love you
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
Wednesday, May 28, 2014 12:07:54 AMTwitter for Android
Cue the wheelchair for this wedding... Tuesday, May 27, 2014 11:54:25 PMTwitter for Android
Cuncel game 5 Tuesday, May 27, 2014 10:42:25 PMTwitter for Android
This Coors Light tastes like Mexican sweaty chlorine pool water Tuesday, May 27, 2014 10:37:43 PMTwitter for Android
The fuck is it possible to be that bad on the power play? Tuesday, May 27, 2014 9:14:10 PMTwitter for Android
This old bitch singing is pretty shitty Tuesday, May 27, 2014 8:10:13 PMTwitter for Android
Chillin yo Monday, May 26, 2014 9:18:28 PMTwitter for Android
I make the worst mojitos in all of the land. Mojito. What. I don't think it's a gay drink. Monday, May 26, 2014 6:02:20 PMTwitter for Android
If you're gonna play Creed at the bar, at least play My Own Prison. Not gonna lie, songs not bad.. #barstoolconfessions Friday, May 23, 2014 4:52:38 PMTwitter for Android
Who's the dick who is trolling the jukebox with Creed? 3 in a row now... Friday, May 23, 2014 4:50:59 PMTwitter for Android
RT @KFCBarstool: If you don't send a girl a picture of your dick in a hot dog bun this holiday weekend, you're doing it wrong. Friday, May 23, 2014 4:49:13 PMTwitter for Android
https://t.co/FOuHmCUUd1 This is a good read about why everything is broken and sucks Thursday, May 22, 2014 12:45:13 AMTwitter for Android
"Not that I'm promoting prostitution, but I'm promoting prostitution and stripping." -@MalJNew Wednesday, May 21, 2014 7:37:46 PMTwitter for Android
I respect Jeter for banging on his chest and saying yeah Jeets to video highlights. If Twitter was a sport, I'd bang my chest to my tweets Wednesday, May 21, 2014 7:15:05 PMTwitter for Android
Just googled " Mexican bag of chickens painting" don't ask... Wednesday, May 21, 2014 6:50:24 PMTwitter for Android
O shit. Yanks are on? $3 Coors Lights? Never going back to the office. Wednesday, May 21, 2014 2:46:36 PMTwitter for Android
I lost by .33 points in fantasy this week. Bastards Monday, May 19, 2014 9:17:55 AMTwitter for Android
Two more hours I'm "on call" and by on call I mean drunk at brunch.s Sunday, May 18, 2014 4:22:13 PMTwitter for Android
That time when you're shitface and your mom tells you to call Sunday, May 18, 2014 4:17:22 PMTwitter for Android
@kerbear88 come on. This cannot be why you don't root for them
In reply to @kerbear88's tweet
Sunday, May 18, 2014 3:37:17 PMTwitter for Android
Idk how I got this drunk without trying Sunday, May 18, 2014 3:35:58 PMTwitter for Android
Wasted Sunday, May 18, 2014 3:30:00 PMTwitter for Android
Fuck. Drunk texted my boss today... Sunday, May 18, 2014 1:44:46 AMTwitter for Android
@dannyrob88 fuck you bro. Lolololo
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, May 18, 2014 1:24:48 AMTwitter for Android
I'm asleep and its 9pm whack #ICantHang hijacked by @dannyrob88 ha @Waspito http://t.co/IubNpLaDmh Saturday, May 17, 2014 9:01:00 PMTwitter for Android
I drank way too much and I still have a headband in that's purple. Saturday, May 17, 2014 3:28:26 PMTwitter for Android
Eheyyy Joe Vinny Chris Y Tom Saturday, May 17, 2014 3:08:44 PMTwitter for Android
I'm in a room full of guineas and the Italian slag going on is cracking me up. Saturday, May 17, 2014 3:03:49 PMTwitter for Android
If you're Italian, you call your mother, Ma, right? I mean heyyyyyy ohhhh! Saturday, May 17, 2014 3:00:28 PMTwitter for Android
I'm now fucked up Saturday, May 17, 2014 2:54:31 PMTwitter for Android
Shit. We just did a lit of fireball Saturday, May 17, 2014 2:37:53 PMTwitter for Android
Broken bar glass #1 of the day. Live errr day like it's your last Saturday, May 17, 2014 2:12:05 PMTwitter for Android
Nurrrrrseeeeeee. Bring me.more.mimosas Saturday, May 17, 2014 1:28:27 PMTwitter for Android
"We were talking about blowing up hymens. Get on our level" -@MalJNew Saturday, May 17, 2014 1:24:47 PMTwitter for Android
You're jelly of my fly headband selfie. PS o hay accidental smokeshow in the background.... http://t.co/Y2zzohBgj3 Saturday, May 17, 2014 1:11:33 PMTwitter for Android
Thus guy is aweeeeesomeeee dudee Saturday, May 17, 2014 1:08:25 AMTwitter for Android
Every time my phone goes off, I expect @__JLu to be favoriting one of my tweets, but it is an alert about how our reporting is down #die Friday, May 16, 2014 11:57:58 PMTwitter for Android
Drinkin Bud Light bottles. Tastes like the Grape, but cheaper Friday, May 16, 2014 11:46:19 PMTwitter for Android
Kevin's friend is playing ass twerkin videos all night and the gf is like:

I approve of this http://t.co/L0ymJxkgDJ 		Friday, May 16, 2014 11:37:48 PMTwitter for Android
@portfolioso *Lil Jon. Autocorrect som
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Friday, May 16, 2014 11:36:27 PMTwitter for Android
Bubble Butt.. This is some beyond twerking shit Friday, May 16, 2014 11:35:06 PMTwitter for Android
Just watched the music video of Turn Down for What by DJ Snake and Lil John. DAFUQ Friday, May 16, 2014 11:30:41 PMTwitter for Android
Our shit has been down all night and look at all the fucks I give. Maybe it'll give McGivern a heart attack. Friday, May 16, 2014 10:39:05 PMTwitter for Android
Will you crackers on call fix the reporting cluster so I stop getting alerts while I'm trying to get shitfaced on Friday night? Please and thx Friday, May 16, 2014 9:28:25 PMTwitter for Android
Why is it that the only people who go through your recycling for bottle deposits are middle aged Asian women? Friday, May 16, 2014 7:49:08 PMTwitter for Android
Touche, @KFCBarstool , touche. Sounds like a blast... http://t.co/x0CObWa1EC Friday, May 16, 2014 7:04:35 PMTwitter for Android
This old bitch is watching loud videos on her phone. Shut the fuck up Friday, May 16, 2014 6:56:51 PMTwitter for Android
No seats and the door to the car with like 3, people in it is locked. These mother fuckers #MTA Friday, May 16, 2014 6:47:53 PMTwitter for Android
If this train was on time and not 8 minutes late, I wouldn't have gotten caught in the rain. #MTA #die Friday, May 16, 2014 6:43:49 PMTwitter for Android
.@DRob30 is my dude Thursday, May 15, 2014 10:17:43 PMTwitter for Android
If your family brings three fucking bikes into the subway at rush hour, you all deserve the worst Thursday, May 15, 2014 6:26:17 PMTwitter for Android
Tanaka is the only competent pitcher on this entire team Wednesday, May 14, 2014 10:13:05 PMTwitter for Android
Tanaka with the base hit. Digging it Wednesday, May 14, 2014 9:58:25 PMTwitter for Android
Get a load of this piece of shit Yankee team Tuesday, May 13, 2014 8:40:06 PMTwitter for Android
Nuno you fuckin amateur hour. If my team wasn't the fuckin hospital team, maybe we wouldn't suck balls and lose to los mets Tuesday, May 13, 2014 8:14:12 PMTwitter for Android
Old man Jeter can't get the job done Tuesday, May 13, 2014 8:05:28 PMTwitter for Android
@kerbear88 I've seen a woman use a stroller with the kid in it to hold the door open. I was rooting for Darwinism. Sadly, all parties lived
In reply to @kerbear88's tweet
Tuesday, May 13, 2014 7:38:08 PMTwitter for Android
RT @KFCBarstool: Serious question...will the Yankees ever beat the Mets again? Ever? Monday, May 12, 2014 11:36:53 PMTwitter for Android
Do not fuck with mama geese. Biddies are batshit crazy. Almost attacked me going 20 on my bike. Not hurting your kids bro, chill Monday, May 12, 2014 2:53:16 PMTwitter for Android
RT @KFCBarstool: "KFC you're such a negative fucking person" - @stoolpresidente. Another gem of a Rundown coming your way later today Monday, May 12, 2014 2:52:03 PMTwitter for Android
@__JLu been around a while. Very useful!
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
Monday, May 12, 2014 2:02:30 PMTwitter for Android
Café Patron and greens (salad if you're too stupid to believe that) Sunday, May 11, 2014 2:03:56 AMTwitter for Android
I mean... ATC's All Around The World is fuckin fantastic right now. #2000 Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:52:14 AMTwitter for Android
I'm drink or something Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:28:22 AMTwitter for Android
Beatsie boys are on. Reminds me of the co founder COO we fired like assholes because he was the shit and now they should crash and burn Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:18:18 AMTwitter for Android
Just belted Sex and Candy. Neighbors may not be pleased Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:16:09 AMTwitter for Android
"Black as the ace of spades" anyone else have a racist family? Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:14:19 AMTwitter for Android
Always awkward when the twin towers show up in 90s videos Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:10:25 AMTwitter for Android
#titanic Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:07:02 AMTwitter for Android
🎵and you know thatch my heart will go on 🎵 so 90s was in 4th grade Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:06:48 AMTwitter for Android
The girls are watching empowering 90s pop videos. My question is that why does Celene Dion say "thatch" in my heart will go on? Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:06:05 AMTwitter for Android
🎵Don't go chasing waterfalls🎵 Sunday, May 11, 2014 1:01:48 AMTwitter for Android