612 tweets posted from BlueSky
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| Tweet | Date | Source |
|---|---|---|
| Idk how I used to be a raging alcoholic in college, because my body completely rejects beer in my elder years. I had one beer, two nights in a row and I'm shitting my brains out (sry tmi not sorry) | Thursday, March 19, 2026 1:14:33 AM | BlueSky |
| You know what's so annoying? Shitting before a shower, thinking you'll be all fresh and clean, only having to shit again directly after the shower. Although the recirculation loop pumping out warm bidet water is a GAME CHANGER | Wednesday, March 18, 2026 11:07:00 PM | BlueSky |
| "E. It looks like a bunch of pepperonis attacked you" #ShitGirstGradersSay | Monday, March 16, 2026 4:57:34 PM | BlueSky |
| Logitech mouse middle click stopped working reliably. Opened it up and it had a foam pad that pressed the button on the board, but the foam was so indented it wasn't pressing anymore. Jammed some cardboard over it and it works as good as new. #solutionsengineer | Monday, March 16, 2026 1:26:45 PM | BlueSky |
| "It was pretty good, to be surprised" - Eliana (she meant tbh) | Saturday, March 14, 2026 10:46:48 AM | BlueSky |
| So what are the best countries willing to take disgruntled Americans? Anyone? I think it's about time to GTFO here like my ancestors left Southern Italy in the early 1900s https://search.app/KcAc7 | Saturday, March 14, 2026 1:15:00 AM | BlueSky |
| You know my tism is out in full force when my social interactions make less than zero sense. Kid's friend's parent: "Have a great night" Me: "See you then" | Friday, March 13, 2026 7:53:34 PM | BlueSky |
| Microsoft CoPilot is in love with the word "clean" Ask it anything. It will include "clean" in the response. It's enraging. They need to dial this shit back a little ffs | Friday, March 13, 2026 12:23:10 AM | BlueSky |
| This is some Midwestern bullshit right hur [[ Image ]] | Wednesday, March 11, 2026 7:56:28 PM | BlueSky |
| This dude on reddit said he witnessed the most gruesome fatal accident ever. It's wild how the entire thread is telling him to play Tetris. I guess there's valid studies regarding it preventing PTSD, but it just sounds absurd | Wednesday, March 11, 2026 3:37:11 AM | BlueSky |
| auto_restart_kiosk.bat with a press any key pause🤣 Nothing unattended about that! Who's using batch files anymore? Also, all these Kiosk probs are Windows 🤔 In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Sunday, March 08, 2026 2:18:40 PM | BlueSky |
| One of my hobbies is documenting failed kiosks that have errored out [[ Image ]][[ Image ]][[ Image ]] | Sunday, March 08, 2026 11:34:34 AM | BlueSky |
| What would you say is the best Asus Wifi 7 router I can get at this moment that will have long-term Merlin AsusWRT support? the 86 series is midrange (AC/AX/BE) but seems to be most popular with the most firmware downloads. I've seen some niche high end older models get neglected by Asus In reply to @asuswrt-merlin.net's post | Thursday, March 05, 2026 1:50:16 PM | BlueSky |
| Giving up weed for 3 days: 2/29, 2/30, and 2/31 | Sunday, March 01, 2026 2:21:44 AM | BlueSky |
| So you're 21 😂 In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Saturday, February 14, 2026 4:09:10 PM | BlueSky |
| Lol I can't tell if you're trolling with that or genuinely like the concept. I had a cheap similar one and it was meh - maybe it was accurate? Couldn't tell. But I've seen some fancy ones that are probably more accurate and can even identify the exact charging protocol negotiated. Get a good one! In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Friday, February 06, 2026 11:46:34 PM | BlueSky |
| TF this cracker talking about [[ Image ]] | Tuesday, February 03, 2026 5:26:51 PM | BlueSky |
| Awww. How's pupper doing? I remember you saying s/he was sick In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Friday, January 23, 2026 1:15:54 AM | BlueSky |
| I like the idea of Bluesky better because it's a refreshing place, it's just that the majority are still on Elon's dumb bullshit. I just can't stay away from the format. Been in Twitter Jail this past week so I'm finding myself here more | Sunday, January 18, 2026 12:55:59 PM | BlueSky |
| I love that you did this. Should do again in today's climate In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Saturday, January 17, 2026 10:10:41 PM | BlueSky |
| A door to door solicitor pushed me too far today (dog recovering from surgery and needs rest, and she got up to bark at the door). So I put 5 of these all around my door and doorbell [[ Image ]] | Friday, January 16, 2026 7:44:35 PM | BlueSky |
| Nothing is more enraging than Azure APIs and the fact that Microsoft literally sends back different responses for the same gd request within 30 seconds. I have an engineer who loops through API versions and makes the same API call in try/catch because "it'll work on for of them" JFC | Thursday, January 15, 2026 11:24:50 PM | BlueSky |
| That's it. AI is pissing me off and outputting absolute garbage. I'm writing this myself 😎 | Thursday, January 15, 2026 11:16:37 PM | BlueSky |
| No. NO. Just NO. Why do people do this. You need to go DC to DC. It's so inefficient to run an inverter to convert to AC power just for the wall wart to convert it back to DC. This person needs to get a 100W USB-C to C cable and charge it that way [[ Image ]] | Wednesday, January 14, 2026 5:08:50 PM | BlueSky |
| X just banned me for a week because I told the ohiogop account that I hope they got ebola | Wednesday, January 14, 2026 12:07:58 AM | BlueSky |
| After hating on the whole javascript ecosystem for 15 years, I'm finally embracing it because it's everywhere and if you don't adapt, the old dino gets kicked to the curb | Saturday, December 27, 2025 2:57:12 PM | BlueSky |
| What kind of shit is this [[ Image ]] | Sunday, December 21, 2025 12:37:33 PM | BlueSky |
| Same, girl, same. But you come across confident. No one would know In reply to @tracketpacer.bsky.social's post | Saturday, December 20, 2025 1:26:58 AM | BlueSky |
| Seriously though. Where do the Canadian geese think they're going. It's 2am and raining and they're up there honking up a storm flying somewhere on a mission | Friday, December 19, 2025 2:09:10 AM | BlueSky |
| In Twitter jail. I really don't understand what the problem is with saying that a child rapist should be sent foot first through a wood chipper. [[ Image ]] | Thursday, December 04, 2025 6:39:16 PM | BlueSky |
| How can I make money trolling the maga dummies on X? I want in on this?!?! In reply to @tracketpacer.bsky.social's post | Friday, November 28, 2025 12:07:43 PM | BlueSky |
| Engineer on my team asked our overnight team to approve a PR. Fuckin guy comments "looks good. approved" doesn't actually approve it, and then closes the PR with unmerged changes. My Brother in Christ, what is actually wrong with you? | Tuesday, November 25, 2025 1:13:45 AM | BlueSky |
| When they say something is spicy, is it socially acceptable to ask if it's white people spicy, or actually spicy? | Tuesday, November 18, 2025 11:45:11 AM | BlueSky |
| I am home alone and have the heat set to 62 and I'm in my glories | Monday, November 17, 2025 10:57:33 PM | BlueSky |
| Your network made it back In reply to @tracketpacer.bsky.social's post | Friday, November 14, 2025 8:48:11 PM | BlueSky |
| I never find the need to drink wine until I have some wine and then I want more wine | Monday, November 10, 2025 11:44:27 PM | BlueSky |
| I've had enough of society. 3I/ATLAS better be an alien spaceship and it'll do us all a big favor wiping is out | Tuesday, November 04, 2025 11:18:05 AM | BlueSky |
| I can't believe the asshole LA Dodgers won the World Series again and Don Mattingly gets absolutely nothing his entire career. | Sunday, November 02, 2025 9:49:27 PM | BlueSky |
| Lol what even is this thread. The amount of energy this dude is exerting being big mad at your videos is one of the more puzzling things I've seen on the interwebs in a while. In reply to @tracketpacer.bsky.social's post | Saturday, October 18, 2025 2:13:05 AM | BlueSky |
| Amateur hour, joining BlueSky and not even configuring their handle to be @dhs.gov. How am I supposed to take these pricks seriously? In reply to @homelandgov.bsky.social's post | Saturday, October 18, 2025 1:58:16 AM | BlueSky |
| Twitter is literally so bad. My algorithm is so bad. | Monday, October 06, 2025 11:22:05 PM | BlueSky |
| I've always been a fan of PowerShell, and thought I was nifty with this one script... TL;DR my Windows VM got corrupted and I didn't want the bloat, so I ported the script to bash on linux. Result: bash script is so much simpler and they achieve the same exact thing 😯 | Monday, October 06, 2025 11:18:12 PM | BlueSky |
| Update: couple are catchy, but meh. It's all recycled In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Sunday, October 05, 2025 8:54:21 AM | BlueSky |
| Confession. I think my 6 yr old turned me into a Swiftie because I'm up listening to her new record and it slaps. | Friday, October 03, 2025 1:11:13 AM | BlueSky |
| These laws are so fucking stupid and put undue burden on tech companies. This increases costs and complexity. Moron leadership in these stupid ass red states In reply to @safety.bsky.app's post | Sunday, September 28, 2025 9:08:03 PM | BlueSky |
| This cannot be serious but it really is. I'm gonna pee my pants [[ Image ]] | Monday, September 22, 2025 10:20:37 PM | BlueSky |
| This cannot be serious right now,.I'm gonna pee my.l pants [[ Image ]] | Monday, September 22, 2025 10:19:50 PM | BlueSky |
| I'm watching a lady on TikTok do simple math on an abacus and I've never felt dumber in my life | Wednesday, September 17, 2025 1:43:15 AM | BlueSky |
| In reply to @sysengineer.dev's post | Sunday, September 14, 2025 10:01:04 PM | BlueSky |
| One way to give me an immediate emotional breakdown is to show me posts of people who just lost their dogs. Idk why this content shows up on my timeline and I don't know any of these people or their sweet dog, but it turns me into an instant mess. | Sunday, September 14, 2025 9:59:44 PM | BlueSky |
| Look at these union guys | Thursday, September 04, 2025 9:59:00 AM | BlueSky |
| I literally cannot take this article seriously. The Pixel 6 series was the biggest piece of shit Google ever launched, and this jerkoff is trying to say his 6 is better than the 10? Get the hell out of here. share.google/NeKXe9Ng97fC... | Wednesday, September 03, 2025 12:34:14 AM | BlueSky |
| Luna sleeps [[ Image ]] In reply to @tracketpacer.bsky.social's post | Friday, August 15, 2025 7:02:35 PM | BlueSky |
| [[ Image ]] In reply to @alexengineer10.bsky.social's post | Sunday, August 10, 2025 12:09:41 PM | BlueSky |
| Shit guys. This gummy and this glass of wine and I'm gooooood right now | Saturday, August 09, 2025 4:21:19 PM | BlueSky |
| I love it when my intuition is correct. | Tuesday, August 05, 2025 10:01:13 PM | BlueSky |
| Testing my migration thingy... | Tuesday, August 05, 2025 4:59:53 PM | BlueSky |
| For example... [[ Image ]] In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Friday, July 25, 2025 7:40:13 PM | BlueSky |
| I literally cannot stop trolling MAGA government officials over on X with DEEZ NUTS. I'll rephrase part of their post and end it with Deez Nuts. Maybe I'm a child, but it will never NOT be funny. | Friday, July 25, 2025 7:38:28 PM | BlueSky |
| I literally cannot stop trolling MAGA government officials over on X with DEEZ NUTS. I'll rephrase part of their post and end it with Deez Nuts and maybe I'm a child, but it will never NOT be funny. [[ Image ]] | Friday, July 25, 2025 7:35:53 PM | BlueSky |
| Summer can officially suck a dick. Can't wait for this shit to end in October. It's DIABOLICAL for it to be 90 degrees with a heat index of 106 at fucking 10:30 PM in the Midwest. Dew Point of 78... Fuck outta here. Bugs and shit everywhere. HATE HATE HATE Can it be winter already? | Friday, July 25, 2025 12:26:18 AM | BlueSky |
| 🍄🌀✌️🌌🚀 [[ Image ]] | Saturday, July 19, 2025 1:29:30 AM | BlueSky |
| 🍄✌️🚀🌌 [[ Image ]] | Saturday, July 19, 2025 1:27:33 AM | BlueSky |
| "We learned that her owner no longer wanted her" Fuck is wrong with people?! [[ Image ]] | Saturday, July 05, 2025 12:57:32 PM | BlueSky |
| The Supreme Court stinks | Friday, June 27, 2025 5:40:00 PM | BlueSky |
| I'm unhinged in the sense that I can read sad stories about random strangers' dogs passing and immediately start sobbing... But like, for the most part, I don't really give a shit about people. | Friday, June 27, 2025 5:39:27 PM | BlueSky |
| This is fine In reply to @alexengineer10.bsky.social's post | Saturday, June 21, 2025 11:19:18 PM | BlueSky |
| Can't stand summer [[ Image ]] | Saturday, June 21, 2025 12:49:26 AM | BlueSky |
| I swear to Christ, this is the last time I volunteer to update "something quick and easy" in a legacy repo that hasn't been touched in a few years. | Friday, June 20, 2025 4:42:36 PM | BlueSky |
| I posted a picture of a mystic, psychedelic tree on insta and only my wifey liked it. Come on people. Do better. Don't you realize trees are the coolest? | Wednesday, June 11, 2025 10:15:23 PM | BlueSky |
| UN is reporting that world fertility rates are in severe decline. Why is anyone shocked? 1) No one can afford to have a family 2) We're literally poisoning ourselves with plastic 3) pollution and synthetic pesticides are rampant Just send a meteor. We need to hit control-alt-delete on the planet | Tuesday, June 10, 2025 10:28:47 PM | BlueSky |
| I hate fuckin casinos. I understand probability and know the house always comes out on top, and the only time I'll ever gamble is like $20-40 max and when I'm with a group. But for fucks sake, at least let me play for 20 minutes. Every time I fuckin gamble, I'm wiped in like 2 minutes | Tuesday, June 10, 2025 9:53:32 PM | BlueSky |
| I've been here 20 minutes and Eddie is already telling me he banged three models | Monday, June 09, 2025 5:47:39 PM | BlueSky |
| Definitely don't eat a whole bunch of mushrooms and then listen to this track, or else you might be in for a little brain treat: youtu.be/6PfYo-YYVPY?... | Monday, June 09, 2025 6:11:18 AM | BlueSky |
| People who go 45 mph when the speed limit is 55 are complete pricks | Thursday, June 05, 2025 3:48:05 PM | BlueSky |
| Yes, full on Dexter style In reply to @xhamulnazgul.bsky.social's post | Friday, May 30, 2025 7:41:02 PM | BlueSky |
| Who shot that dog. I will find them and send them straight through the wood chipper. Foot first. In reply to @tracketpacer.bsky.social's post | Friday, May 30, 2025 6:41:39 PM | BlueSky |
| My wife doesn't want to hear about our inefficient, shitty water heater setup and how it's a ticking time bomb, so I had a 20 minute convo with an LMM about it, which probably in turn, ended up using 300kWh of electric and 600 gallons of water to analyze my situation and chat about it | Friday, May 30, 2025 6:20:16 PM | BlueSky |
| We live in a pretty damn good simulation if shit like this is accounted for: [[ Image ]] | Friday, May 30, 2025 5:03:09 PM | BlueSky |
| Call me a weirdo, but M&Ms in in a glass of milk is 🔥🔥🔥 There's something about sweet, petroleum-dyed milk and the coldness of the M&Ms with their coating coming off that's top notch | Thursday, May 29, 2025 11:19:27 AM | BlueSky |
| Anyone remember when American Idiot came out and we were all mad at George W. Bush and now it's like what the fuck is actually happening? | Saturday, May 24, 2025 6:14:01 PM | BlueSky |
| I've been at the brewery for a bit, which means I'm 100% going to be getting the shits | Saturday, May 24, 2025 5:13:06 PM | BlueSky |
| Not trying to stereotype here, but I looked up the kiddo's school ratings by ethnicity, and this completely checks out... [[ Image ]] | Thursday, May 22, 2025 2:01:24 AM | BlueSky |
| Then they're *shocked* when the CEOs get unalived by disgruntled people. In reply to @shenet.works's post | Thursday, May 22, 2025 1:00:19 AM | BlueSky |
| I get this a lot =( [[ Image ]] In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Wednesday, May 21, 2025 5:04:30 PM | BlueSky |
| I wish I was able to form well organized thoughts and tell stories in a concise manner that hold people's attention because it feels really shitty when you're telling a story, struggling to get to the point and then you lose your audience | Wednesday, May 21, 2025 5:03:38 PM | BlueSky |
| I'm actually appalled. Been buying the same pair of Under Armour sneakers for years and they were always $40-50. Today, they were $80. I had no choice because my old ones have holes and they're one of the rare brands that does 4E wide because I have a gorilla foot. 😞 | Wednesday, May 21, 2025 2:20:06 PM | BlueSky |
| I made very poor decisions a month ago by picking Newark for a layover on my work trip because I didn't want to fly into DC's shitty collision-prone airspace, and now Newark is a useless, third world airport. Going to need to change the flight. It's been getting cancelled every day. | Thursday, May 15, 2025 11:47:51 PM | BlueSky |
| The world totally ended in 2019. CERN blew us all up or something and put us on another timeline. This is definitely The Bad Place. | Sunday, May 11, 2025 12:49:18 AM | BlueSky |
| Part of me needs to stop watching post apocalyptic shows, but part of me needs to know what to expect | Saturday, May 03, 2025 2:28:43 AM | BlueSky |
| Car dealership oil change waiting room coffee hits different | Tuesday, April 29, 2025 10:14:25 AM | BlueSky |
| Therapist: "How do you plan on getting through the next 4 years?" Me: | Tuesday, April 29, 2025 2:52:48 AM | BlueSky |
| The year is 2025 and politics are so bad, we're passing around George W. Bush videos of him sounding like a scholar and saying "ya know, we didn't like that guy back then, but I'd take him back" | Saturday, April 26, 2025 1:04:05 AM | BlueSky |
| I work from home. I'm not a creep. Leave me alone with this noise. Come on now, I'm no threat. In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Wednesday, April 23, 2025 1:58:04 PM | BlueSky |
| This sexual harassment training is a drag... They literally forced it to be an hour long. It's the same one 4 years in a row so I know all the answers, but they set a fixed time for an hour so it is forcing me to pick wrong answers to lengthen the training and I don't have time for this shit rn | Wednesday, April 23, 2025 1:45:53 PM | BlueSky |
| Get pizza. Go to Madison Square Park and see the Flatiron building (near there). Go to Barcade in Brooklyn Staten Island ferry is free. There is nothing to do in Staten Island so go there for the free boat ride and views, and proceed to take it right back to Manhattan before it leaves again. In reply to @snubs.bsky.social's post | Wednesday, April 23, 2025 9:23:39 AM | BlueSky |
| Gen Z be like [[ Image ]] | Sunday, April 20, 2025 12:08:04 AM | BlueSky |
| Trees are honestly the coolest. Each one tells a story. | Thursday, April 17, 2025 6:54:51 PM | BlueSky |
| Normalize Gen Z going wiki wild at the bar to Nickelback | Thursday, April 17, 2025 12:01:33 AM | BlueSky |
| The wokes are all boycotting Target now because they rolled back DEI... I was ahead of our time. Never cared for Target | Wednesday, April 16, 2025 12:56:19 AM | BlueSky |
