612 tweets posted from BlueSky
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| Tweet | Date | Source |
|---|---|---|
| Protip: Don't eat a shit ton of Mexican the day before the airport. I'm crop-dusting Atlanta so badly right now. Gassy as a bastard over here | Thursday, October 15, 2026 11:58:51 AM | BlueSky |
| Twilight is so fking dumb. Bitty should stick to banging humans instead of fucking around with werewolves and vampires | Sunday, October 11, 2026 3:46:24 PM | BlueSky |
| My 7 year old, watching Twilight for the first time and Victoria shows up the first time: "Ooo she's hot" | Saturday, October 10, 2026 9:37:00 PM | BlueSky |
| I'm not even joking. This simulation is glitching. CERN shut down their particle collider bullshit why? They turned that shit on in 2001 and the world hasn't been the same since. | Friday, October 09, 2026 2:53:40 AM | BlueSky |
| I'm actually done. I hate this fucking timeline. We have literal pedophiles and criminals in charge of the government, genocides, cost of living crises and the entire environment is poisoned and ruined. Fuck it all. It's time for a fucking meteor to end this abomination. In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Friday, October 09, 2026 2:50:13 AM | BlueSky |
| I'm actually done. I hate this fucking timeline. We have criminals in charge of government, genocides, cost of living crises and the entire environment is ruined. Fuck it all. Send a fucking meteor and end his abomination In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Friday, October 09, 2026 2:47:53 AM | BlueSky |
| I'm fucking done with late stage capitalism. Done. I saw this email from the pricks over at @microsoft.com and knew it wasn't going to be good. How do you go from 1 TB of storage per person to 2 TB shared across the whole subscription with 5 people on it? You pay more and more for less. Fuck off [[ Image ]] | Friday, October 09, 2026 2:46:14 AM | BlueSky |
| This wasn't even the play I was talking about. She had another basket catch right at the wall. https://www.mlb.com/video/yankees-ball-girl-makes-impressive-diving-catch Someone give this kid a scholarship! In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Thursday, October 08, 2026 11:51:04 AM | BlueSky |
| The best highlight of yesterday's Yankee game was the redhead bat girl who scooped up the fastest line drive in foul territory I've ever seen. Showed better agility than the every one of those jerkoff fuckin Yankees did. | Thursday, October 08, 2026 11:49:26 AM | BlueSky |
| Baseball is dead | Wednesday, October 07, 2026 10:19:52 PM | BlueSky |
| Cancel the season! Yankees are a bunch of jerkoffs stranding the bases loaded in a 1-1 game and then the very next inning, the Rays play small ball and now all of a sudden, it's 3-1. | Monday, October 05, 2026 9:59:00 PM | BlueSky |
| My September ISP bandwidth, tracked via a custom ASUSWRT cronjob and a custom data ingest + dashboard I built [[ Image ]] | Friday, October 02, 2026 4:14:24 PM | BlueSky |
| I mean, this checks completely. Just look at him. Picture screams "ax murderer" [[ Image ]] | Wednesday, September 30, 2026 3:30:07 PM | BlueSky |
| Pro tip: also teach pup how to come down the stairs. I was so proud when I taught her how to go up the stairs and she figured it out. Problem was, she didn't know how to come down. She loved going up and thought it was a game, but would always cry for me to get her. This repeated for hours, lolz In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Wednesday, September 30, 2026 1:47:09 AM | BlueSky |
| The jerkoff engineer I complained about constantly is now on paternity leave. Now that he's out, the amount of fuckery I am finding in his work is beyond a pain in my ass. Now I have to clean all this shit up. His paternity leave needs to be permanent, because the guy sucks at what he does | Wednesday, September 30, 2026 1:40:59 AM | BlueSky |
| I miss New York so much | Sunday, September 27, 2026 12:09:39 AM | BlueSky |
| Joe's Pizza at 3:45am. I love New York City! | Saturday, September 26, 2026 3:42:45 AM | BlueSky |
| You got doge? 😍 In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Saturday, September 26, 2026 12:28:05 AM | BlueSky |
| I love it when they call me Big Poppa I only smoke blunts if they rolled propa | Saturday, September 26, 2026 12:27:33 AM | BlueSky |
| Insufficient food. JFC. You ever go to an event and then you need to go out to eat later. Fuck outta hea | Friday, September 25, 2026 10:43:06 PM | BlueSky |
| Can uber drivers not soak themselves in a shit ton of cologne please and thanks. I'm fuckin dying in here. christ | Friday, September 25, 2026 7:15:06 PM | BlueSky |
| Jesus Christ almighty. Windows 11 is such a buggy piece oif bloated shit. Explain how the start menu becomes unclickable until a reboot. How does this bullshit happen? https://techcommunity.microsoft.com/discussions/windows11/windows-11-taskbar-becomes-unclickable-randomly/4472791 @microsoft.com get your shit together | Wednesday, September 23, 2026 11:08:56 AM | BlueSky |
| I find it cute that the three Indian families on my block all share one riding mower to do their yards with. One dude bought it but they just share it | Sunday, September 20, 2026 6:19:40 PM | BlueSky |
| Good thing everything's so expensive that I just got paid today and the entire paycheck can't pay one of my credit card bills. My savings has been taking a shit | Friday, September 18, 2026 8:23:31 AM | BlueSky |
| 10 years in prison is not good enough. You do this to a dog, the only thing acceptable is being sent foot first through a wood chipper [[ Image ]] | Wednesday, September 16, 2026 11:05:22 PM | BlueSky |
| Nothing is ever fucking easy where I work. You go to do the simplest bullshit and you end up down the rabbit hole fixing 20 fucked up libraries and wanting to choke out offshore engineers | Wednesday, September 16, 2026 5:35:29 PM | BlueSky |
| Who'da thunk suggesting that we should put the top 10 Billionaires into the Squid Games every year on Nextdoor would get you banned (I stand by this statement. Fuck a billionaire) | Wednesday, September 16, 2026 11:04:18 AM | BlueSky |
| Save this oak tree! https://share.google/fLyH881Mx4TM1Z5yS | Tuesday, September 15, 2026 10:43:14 AM | BlueSky |
| Nope. Nope. Fuck this. Wrong direction. Cool the fuck down [[ Image ]] | Monday, September 14, 2026 1:36:52 PM | BlueSky |
| And it's so sweet too. "Sweet Virginia" lyric appearing many times in Foo Fighters songs and her song. Virginia is Dave's mom and her grandma In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Monday, September 14, 2026 12:45:31 PM | BlueSky |
| Dave Grohl's kid putting out better music than the Foo Fighters in 2026 wasn't on my bingo card In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Monday, September 14, 2026 12:43:18 PM | BlueSky |
| See, this is how you know I'm elderly. If you watched the Foo Fighter's 2011 Documentary Back and Forth, she was just a kid in it and begging her dad to go swimming with her. Now she's a whole ass musician In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Monday, September 14, 2026 12:41:30 PM | BlueSky |
| How about it! Dave Grohl's kid dropping a bitchin rock jam https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=MHHPGNCjFHM | Monday, September 14, 2026 12:40:07 PM | BlueSky |
| TIL there was a full on swing revival that happened in the 90s. Was watching For All Mankind and "Put a Lid on It" by Squirrel Nut Zippers came on and I was like "Damn, this reminds me of Hit the Road Jack" Went down the rabbit hole a bit hole and they recorded it with ribbon mics and tube amps | Monday, September 14, 2026 3:01:59 AM | BlueSky |
| 25 years later and if you show me anything to do with the 9/11 rescue dogs, I am a complete sap | Friday, September 11, 2026 4:02:38 PM | BlueSky |
| 7 year old just casually listening to Bulls on Parade in the other room, which is badass 🤘 #resist #makegoodtrouble | Tuesday, September 08, 2026 5:57:56 PM | BlueSky |
| I better get these motherfuckin Olivia Rodrigo tickets from the pre-sale request list. Ticketmaster can blow me. Wifey's got a milestone bday and I really don't have anything else planned. Also, I didn't get Dasiy Chain Fields, so I'm just banking that karma will be in my favor this time around | Tuesday, September 08, 2026 4:16:08 PM | BlueSky |
| Well hot damn. Silo Season 3 finale made for some fantastic television. That was probably one of the top 5 endings to a season. Ever. | Tuesday, September 08, 2026 2:02:37 AM | BlueSky |
| I will not waste a dime at a casino and I hate them, but I love me a casino buffet like I'm 75 with the AARP discount | Thursday, September 03, 2026 5:37:52 PM | BlueSky |
| My boss hasn't bothered me for two weeks and the day I have fucking shit to do, he's coming at me with 95 audit problems for fucks sake | Wednesday, September 02, 2026 3:12:23 PM | BlueSky |
| Fuck this. Fuck this so much [[ Image ]] | Tuesday, September 01, 2026 3:29:01 PM | BlueSky |
| They put so much gd chlorine in our tap water. I just washed dishes for a while and my hands smell like I've been in a swimming pool all day | Sunday, August 30, 2026 11:12:03 PM | BlueSky |
| Fuckouttahea with this shit. It was cooler all last week and now I need to put up with this noise? [[ Image ]] | Sunday, August 30, 2026 9:54:31 AM | BlueSky |
| So much for the HOMES acronym. The fuck is it supposed to be now? HAMES. The fuck is hames In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Sunday, August 30, 2026 12:27:43 AM | BlueSky |
| Google is a fucking pile of shit because these motherfuckers and that piece of shit billionaire Sundar Pichai were among the first to listen to that rapist, 34-count felon motherfucker by renaming Lake Ontario. FOR FUCKS SAKE. What reality is this [[ Image ]] | Sunday, August 30, 2026 12:25:29 AM | BlueSky |
| I've complained about Happy Eyeballs before. Happy Eyeballs is a gd jerkoff the second a dual-stack split-horizon DNS isn't 100% mirrored. | Friday, August 28, 2026 11:45:00 AM | BlueSky |
| How the ever living fuck am I supposed to read this captcha? [[ Image ]] | Friday, August 28, 2026 11:23:39 AM | BlueSky |
| I'm done with the bullshit state of the world and crashed out on Discord and on a text thread [[ Image ]][[ Image ]] | Thursday, August 27, 2026 12:36:55 PM | BlueSky |
| Y'all. My mid 2000s garage rock playlist. Bangers. Jussayin https://music.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLA1GAr-SLuts | Thursday, August 27, 2026 2:43:01 AM | BlueSky |
| I'm gonna read Dolly's Coat of Many Colors to kiddo tonight in her honor. She got it from her Imagination Library program. I'm such a gd sap. I already couldn't get through it the first time. Idk how I'm gonna read it without losing my shit tn | Tuesday, August 25, 2026 8:23:15 PM | BlueSky |
| My Luna turned 10 today and I love her so much 😍 | Tuesday, August 25, 2026 8:16:55 PM | BlueSky |
| In a time where everything is so fucked up and billionaires and oligarchs control everything, and society is in decline, Dolly was a true example of someone with such kindness, who understood the struggle, and gave back so much to kids with her Imagination Library. I am so sad In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Tuesday, August 25, 2026 2:45:04 PM | BlueSky |
| Oh Jesus Fucking Christ, we lost Dolly Parton today? God damn it! She was a national treasure. | Tuesday, August 25, 2026 2:43:34 PM | BlueSky |
| I literally never even heard of this word in my life In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Monday, August 24, 2026 2:05:56 PM | BlueSky |
| The one gd thing of river rocks I need at Menards is the only one out of stock and the people who need to forklift some more for me are busy loading a gd truck full of pavers and I don't have time for this shit | Monday, August 24, 2026 2:05:08 PM | BlueSky |
| Any time a streaming service raises prices, or locks the service down to one location while they make billions in profits and their execs are paid millions... [[ Image ]] | Saturday, August 22, 2026 9:53:10 PM | BlueSky |
| Anyone remember when Microsoft didn't own GitHub and it wasn't a pile of shit with perpetual outages? | Thursday, August 20, 2026 10:00:22 PM | BlueSky |
| twisted pairs are v. important. IDK how they're even allowed to be flat In reply to @oclsc.bsky.social's post | Wednesday, August 19, 2026 1:10:23 PM | BlueSky |
| Also, someone needs to tell Frontier to stop usingg flat cat 6a cables to the ONT. I threw that right out and only had a cat5e replacement, but at least it's proper. Learned that one from you In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Wednesday, August 19, 2026 4:04:16 AM | BlueSky |
| The same wifi router is 200-300mbps slower in my basement, tested with the same wifi 6 client from 5 ft... Only difference is the block foundation (bouncy!) and being near my main breakers = RF interference. Precisely why I don't put my wifi in the basment In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Wednesday, August 19, 2026 4:01:55 AM | BlueSky |
| I need to borrow you at my house because I just switched to fiber, have both ISPs active at the same time and am running a battery of tests like comparing routing, testing speeds and swapping various equipment. In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Wednesday, August 19, 2026 3:59:54 AM | BlueSky |
| Dog, you're a jerkoff parent if you name your kid 'Jana' but it's pronounced Jenna. 100% of people are going to call her "jah-na" (Ja as in Ja Rule) and mess it up. | Tuesday, August 18, 2026 6:29:16 PM | BlueSky |
| Immediately followed by a Sheetz run. I have a sickness In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Tuesday, August 18, 2026 12:11:42 AM | BlueSky |
| The ol' tism brain is at it again when it's after midnight and instead of sleeping, I'm comparing traceroutes of various services on Frontier Fiber and Spectrum (in the overlap I have both ISPs active). I'll let ya know who's got the better routes | Tuesday, August 18, 2026 12:11:15 AM | BlueSky |
| I'm not making this shit up... [[ Image ]] In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Thursday, August 13, 2026 6:17:16 PM | BlueSky |
| Oh for FUCKS sake! I was testing something at work tagged an aws asset with clusterName: 'deez-nuts' and accidentally left it there. No one noticed. Next thing you know, it showed up in our drift report when the infra code ran 🤦♂️ | Thursday, August 13, 2026 6:13:46 PM | BlueSky |
| Let's look on the bright side of AI fucking up the supply chain with RAM... In capitalism, companies are chap bastards. Computer manufacturers looking for any reason to reduce the amount of RAM needed in newer devices, and it's forcing devs to fix their bloated ass inefficient software | Wednesday, August 12, 2026 2:22:19 PM | BlueSky |
| Disgraziad! https://share.google/smmLdxHZQXker9Kkr | Wednesday, August 12, 2026 1:00:10 AM | BlueSky |
| Google Groups is a good idea in theory, but it's a pile of shit | Tuesday, August 11, 2026 4:00:32 PM | BlueSky |
| You can't have an OS that uses 70% of 8 GB RAM w/ absolutely no programs running. Fuck out of here. Manufacturers are dying to ship with less and the fact that Windows sucks is making every single pc manufacturer look like garbage. Windows needs to boot and use <800 MB idle. Slim tf down ffs In reply to @portfolioso.com's post | Monday, August 10, 2026 12:31:09 AM | BlueSky |
| BULL. SHIT. It's not the MacBook Neo that is making @microsoft.com strive to optimize Windows. It's that Windows 11 is an inefficient pile of shit and every app ever is built on Electron, which uses like 2GB to print Hello World. They are TOTALLY doing this because of the RAM shortage | Monday, August 10, 2026 12:24:43 AM | BlueSky |
| You know what you can't do in the summer? Turn your heat down to 63, put the fireplace on and snuggle under a blanket with an oversized sweatshirt | Monday, August 10, 2026 12:12:49 AM | BlueSky |
| In winter, there are no mosquitos or houseflies | Sunday, August 09, 2026 9:35:53 PM | BlueSky |
| I want a Philly cheesesteak | Saturday, August 08, 2026 10:19:26 PM | BlueSky |
| Seriously fuck the summer. I'm done with it. Heat rage | Saturday, August 08, 2026 4:07:43 PM | BlueSky |
| It's too gd hot outside. I hate summer. Is it over yet? | Saturday, August 08, 2026 3:28:35 PM | BlueSky |
| I have the type of tism where I am REALLY bad at identifying faces. If someone changes up their hair or puts on a fake moustache or something, I'll have NO clue who they are. Might as well be a different person. But I'm like the gd rainman identifying people's cars, and I'm not even into cars. In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Saturday, August 08, 2026 12:31:43 AM | BlueSky |
| I was reading a tech article and it said something about Happy Eyeballs and I was like "what in the actual fuck does that mean" and it turns out to be RFC 8305 You know, IPv6 bullshit (so we can fall back to IPv4 seamlessly) | Wednesday, August 05, 2026 10:39:14 PM | BlueSky |
| It's always DNS In reply to @tracketpacer.com's post | Tuesday, August 04, 2026 10:25:42 PM | BlueSky |
| Dog if your web app doesn't use transparent loading images, reevaluate your life [[ Image ]] | Tuesday, August 04, 2026 5:25:12 PM | BlueSky |
| RIP Vincent Pastore "Big Pussy" Guy was a G https://instagram.com/reel/DJKXlFGPSzA | Sunday, August 02, 2026 10:09:13 AM | BlueSky |
| My Elitebook that's a few generations old that I got on clearance for $800 last year has 64 GB of DDR5 in it. I wouldn't sell it at gunpoint for 3k. We're living in strange times that laptops appreciate in value. Thanks AI and chip shortages 🫤 | Friday, July 31, 2026 11:38:09 PM | BlueSky |
| My buddies and I would always say "noice" in high school instead of nice - idk why. To really emphasize excitement or something. Idk. We were nerds. Today, it's more relevant than ever: No Ice. We were ahead of our time. | Friday, July 31, 2026 2:41:11 PM | BlueSky |
| Five 90s movies to get to know me: Goodfellas (1990) Home Alone (1990) Aladdin (1992) Casino (1995) Scream (1996) | Friday, July 31, 2026 11:21:14 AM | BlueSky |
| Good. SK Hynix can eat a bag of dicks. It is CRIMINAL how much consumer RAM costs. All they give a shit about is AI high bandwidth ram and every gd consumer device is expensive as shit. We're screwed through 2030 at least [[ Image ]] | Thursday, July 30, 2026 10:08:26 PM | BlueSky |
| An LLM just started with "Joe, my brother in Christ..." Which means it learned from me being sassy to it some time ago. We are all doomed | Wednesday, July 29, 2026 1:28:25 AM | BlueSky |
| Based on my knowledge of stereotypes, this metric cannot be true [[ Image ]] | Tuesday, July 28, 2026 1:45:05 AM | BlueSky |
| Joke's on them. I'll get service credit for this. They also don't know I have a Frontier Fiber install date set [[ Image ]] | Monday, July 27, 2026 10:34:41 AM | BlueSky |
| I'm the night watchman, motherfucker. I live in a quiet neighborhood. There was a pickup stopped at a house of a single old lady at 2am that had no business being there. Hopped in my car and found him stopped at another house around the corner. As I approached, I chased him out of the subdivision | Saturday, July 25, 2026 2:11:54 AM | BlueSky |
| "Hi team below pipeline is failing can someone please help!" No. Have you looked at the error and tried to solve it yourself first? Use your brain, or if you cannot do that - as most cannot - at minimum, use an LLM. Then reach out. I'm tired of no one trying anymore | Thursday, July 23, 2026 10:56:03 AM | BlueSky |
| Stonks bad today. Much war. Oil up. [[ Image ]] | Thursday, July 23, 2026 10:36:55 AM | BlueSky |
| If I put $25 into an index fund every time I sharted, I'd be retired already | Monday, July 20, 2026 4:13:29 PM | BlueSky |
| Tech is going to shit. With this RAM shortage, the 2026 Android flagships have WORSE specs than the 2025 ones and are more expensive. I'm especially looking at Google for this bs. | Saturday, July 18, 2026 10:35:26 AM | BlueSky |
| They found Lindsey Graham dead in the closet | Sunday, July 12, 2026 6:44:21 PM | BlueSky |
| Welp, guess I'll die https://apnews.com/article/healthy-heart-sleep-night-owls-circadian-rhythm-0c520492f5d6fc08c412053419e913f9 | Saturday, July 04, 2026 3:00:42 AM | BlueSky |
| Sheetz is poppin at 1:30am on a random weeknight in the suburbs | Thursday, July 02, 2026 1:28:03 AM | BlueSky |
| In case anyone's on the market for a Navien NPE 240-A2 tankless water heater... IDK. They're supposed to be high end advanced devices. Turns out they'll work for 100 days or so and then fail. The fucking piece of shit. And I'm at war with the company that installed it. | Wednesday, July 01, 2026 10:29:32 PM | BlueSky |
| IPv6 is such a gd pain in the ass. Christ | Tuesday, June 30, 2026 11:53:00 PM | BlueSky |
| [[ Image ]] In reply to @safety.bsky.app's post | Tuesday, June 30, 2026 11:44:34 PM | BlueSky |
| They can shut down the Tenor api all they want, but they'll never take away deez [[ Image ]] | Tuesday, June 30, 2026 11:42:59 PM | BlueSky |
