9538 tweets posted from Twitter for Android
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The fuck do I agree to this shit for Thursday, May 28, 2015 12:04:43 AMTwitter for Android
Cuncel DA society Wednesday, May 27, 2015 9:42:02 PMTwitter for Android
Omg stop doing that. FUCK Wednesday, May 27, 2015 9:41:17 PMTwitter for Android
"Sometimes, you just want to shake a bitch" -@kevinrose Wednesday, May 27, 2015 9:36:47 PMTwitter for Android
Everyone sucks Wednesday, May 27, 2015 9:27:02 PMTwitter for Android
I'm about to instigate so hard right now Wednesday, May 27, 2015 8:03:33 PMTwitter for Android
@NYCTSubway at 46th st M/R. Why 2 Manhattan bound Ms in a row? There are never enough R trains. Been here 30 mins. Wednesday, May 27, 2015 12:26:56 PMTwitter for Android
Full train #3 arrived at the station and no one was able to get on. @mta: cunts. Tuesday, May 26, 2015 8:37:20 AMTwitter for Android
Cuncel da Summer Fridays while we're at it also. No fun allowed! No fun allowed! Tuesday, May 26, 2015 8:32:48 AMTwitter for Android
Cuncel da MTA Tuesday, May 26, 2015 8:29:39 AMTwitter for Android
@TWC_Help @TWC_NYNJ also, the only way to get your attention is twitter. No one else fixes it unless I tweet about it
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Monday, May 25, 2015 11:57:37 AMTwitter for Android
My internet is out again. Why does it go out 4-5 times a week you unreliables? @TWC_Help @TWC_NYNJ Monday, May 25, 2015 11:57:07 AMTwitter for Android
@__JLu lol loved it. Watched it immediately after you told me about it.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
Monday, May 25, 2015 1:32:53 AMTwitter for Android
I legit have no idea how to add people on Snapchat. Feel like a gramps Sunday, May 24, 2015 12:55:33 PMTwitter for Android
tl;dr don't go to prison Saturday, May 23, 2015 10:56:41 PMTwitter for Android
Yo my boy's telling the story about how he got arrested in Texas. Grab some popcorn and come listen. Saturday, May 23, 2015 10:28:11 PMTwitter for Android
Happy bday @ky9!!!

-Sketch
PS - Cya at reunion
Saturday, May 23, 2015 8:09:04 PMTwitter for Android
This happened to me today. With alcohol. https://t.co/V3933wysxk Saturday, May 23, 2015 4:48:23 PMTwitter for Android
Homeboy's outfit is fly as fuck http://t.co/vJD1zYJMt1 Saturday, May 23, 2015 4:37:34 PMTwitter for Android
I'm doing a grand job on my on call shift by ignoring all the bullshit fucking alerts before they get to @Docent_Steve Saturday, May 23, 2015 3:49:58 PMTwitter for Android
Absolutely anything that could potentially slow me down is doing so. #NotPleased Friday, May 22, 2015 5:28:33 PMTwitter for Android
At least I get to walk off the fat ass burger king I had for lunch Friday, May 22, 2015 5:14:26 PMTwitter for Android
Cunts @MTA Friday, May 22, 2015 5:00:49 PMTwitter for Android
Whoever's operating this 5 train is a real asshole with the brakes and accelerator. Be smooth bro. Friday, May 22, 2015 9:27:37 AMTwitter for Android
Ya fuked up. Windows aren't aligned bro #3WTC http://t.co/sEs8JSyfKj Tuesday, May 19, 2015 12:37:39 PMTwitter for Android
Get lawst. That was kicked in Monday, May 18, 2015 9:29:09 PMTwitter for Android
GET LAWST Monday, May 18, 2015 8:31:26 PMTwitter for Android
If my dentures ever fall out at my 102nd bday party, please euthanize me: http://t.co/siHLfsjEi1 Sunday, May 17, 2015 8:00:09 PMTwitter for Android
@TWC_Help tell your idiot technicians to screw the fucking wires in tighter on the poles.
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, May 17, 2015 12:05:43 PMTwitter for Android
@TWC_Help want to tell me why your internet is down yet again? Chat said loose wires outside. why does this happens every week Sunday, May 17, 2015 12:02:12 PMTwitter for Android
@TWC_NYNJ WHY do I have another outage. Every other week. This is ridiculous. Please escalate Sunday, May 17, 2015 11:53:07 AMTwitter for Android
RT @KFCBarstool: No exaggeration I'd probably rather be in jail than be at the Preakness with no functioning bathrooms Saturday, May 16, 2015 6:41:34 PMTwitter for Android
Pretty sure I almost pissed my pants and kidneys almost exploded out of karma/sacrilege. Saturday, May 16, 2015 3:44:55 PMTwitter for Android
Oh the Preakness... I may or may not have convinced a Jesuit to move a final exam for me back in '10 to make an appearance. Saturday, May 16, 2015 3:43:55 PMTwitter for Android
Who the fuck has their wedding reception at a lower Manhattan beer garden on a Friday night? Christ Friday, May 15, 2015 9:27:11 PMTwitter for Android
Get it Nate Friday, May 15, 2015 8:56:57 PMTwitter for Android
This Mexican bus boy with the"Sexico" shirt is straight up killing it tonight Friday, May 15, 2015 8:26:16 PMTwitter for Android
@Waspito android apps, google play TV shows/ movies/ books that work on android and can be chromecasted
In reply to @Waspito's tweet
Friday, May 15, 2015 12:13:32 PMTwitter for Android
Quantum Entanglement Thursday, May 14, 2015 11:18:47 PMTwitter for Android
Magnets are really cool Thursday, May 14, 2015 10:49:34 PMTwitter for Android
Fuck you google. Pay me for answering your creepy advertising shits http://t.co/ohzcTtmjjr Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:23:40 PMTwitter for Android
I live my life through others acting ridiculously Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:16:06 PMTwitter for Android
Nate. If you don't get laid we're not talking anymore. Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:15:29 PMTwitter for Android
My discernment is NEVER WRONG Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:11:42 PMTwitter for Android
I can tell by how this cracker is slouchin' they're both dtf Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:11:23 PMTwitter for Android
YoungNate slating pussy week 3 in a row. Smash that brah Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:09:45 PMTwitter for Android
Hoower Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:07:20 PMTwitter for Android
You are on the train home to hubby SEXTING your boo slut Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:05:10 PMTwitter for Android
Mal and Este are such let's be honests for each other Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:04:35 PMTwitter for Android
DON'T DO IT BRIAN. TAKE IT SLOOOWWWWWWWWW Wednesday, May 13, 2015 10:59:08 PMTwitter for Android
NEW YORK CITYYYYYY Wednesday, May 13, 2015 10:54:13 PMTwitter for Android
RANGIZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Wednesday, May 13, 2015 10:51:13 PMTwitter for Android
So I haven't been paying attention. Did fin and em fuck yet? Wednesday, May 13, 2015 10:15:43 PMTwitter for Android
Whoops. Got the bouncer called on us Wednesday, May 13, 2015 10:11:43 PMTwitter for Android
Christ. This fuckin place gets you shitfaced #gorangizzzzzzzz Wednesday, May 13, 2015 9:58:43 PMTwitter for Android
Bitch you're married. Enough Wednesday, May 13, 2015 9:51:29 PMTwitter for Android
Just drunkenly told my beef about gmail to these google peeps and they acknowledged my bug about drafts that don't delete right Wednesday, May 13, 2015 9:29:48 PMTwitter for Android
KC and Jojo's on at the bar now. Everyone's fucking tonight Wednesday, May 13, 2015 9:10:14 PMTwitter for Android
Google DEEZ NUTS Wednesday, May 13, 2015 8:16:50 PMTwitter for Android
@MalJNew hoo hoooooo hohooooo don't do it Brian
In reply to @MalJNew's tweet
Wednesday, May 13, 2015 7:56:15 PMTwitter for Android
Who's alimac banging tonight? I'm gonna go with Noam. Wednesday, May 13, 2015 7:55:20 PMTwitter for Android
@scoopandslam Verizon almost never carries proper Nexus devices... We're stuck with their bloatware and slow updates.
In reply to @scoopandslam's tweet
Wednesday, May 13, 2015 12:43:00 PMTwitter for Android
@scoopandslam This is why I only like Nexus androids. Updates and bug fixes straight from Google. Verizon and Samsung cripple this
In reply to @scoopandslam's tweet
Wednesday, May 13, 2015 11:31:08 AMTwitter for Android
Pull the train out if the station shitheads. This isn't a parking lot. @mta Wednesday, May 13, 2015 10:00:40 AMTwitter for Android
Sorry @MalJNew, everyone at the bar is rootin for the bulls. #lollebron Tuesday, May 12, 2015 9:31:57 PMTwitter for Android
Get a load if this antique creepin into the bar http://t.co/OWO5AzgzTL Tuesday, May 12, 2015 8:46:06 PMTwitter for Android
I'd forgotten how amazing this album is. http://t.co/V9oLEC194i Monday, May 11, 2015 9:44:34 PMTwitter for Android
"There will be liquor bottles and ring pops in the piñata. Hope the kids pick the right one" -Mikey Saturday, May 09, 2015 12:59:33 PMTwitter for Android
You've gotta be fuckin kidding me that there is one single bathroom on this entire fuckin pier Friday, May 08, 2015 7:43:38 PMTwitter for Android
Stewie: "Hoot hoooo hoooo hoooot! Don't do it Brian. Take it sloooooowwwww" Damn it VINCENT Friday, May 08, 2015 1:23:31 AMTwitter for Android
This bitch is relentless. We are trying so hard to get her to leave and she just won't Friday, May 08, 2015 12:44:43 AMTwitter for Android
I just grabbed a dudes ass to make an asshole girl after him jealous because I can smack that and she cannot. Friday, May 08, 2015 12:16:22 AMTwitter for Android
I am not a fan of this David Justice looking (possible wife beating) motherfucker at this party who gave me sass. Friday, May 08, 2015 12:13:01 AMTwitter for Android
I am obsessed with this guy. #21 https://t.co/Su5N06PoCW Thursday, May 07, 2015 10:55:09 PMTwitter for Android
Which one of you rich suit cunts are buying this poor a shot? Thursday, May 07, 2015 10:08:42 PMTwitter for Android
Nate is slaying pussy. 2nd night in a row. So prod of my #YoungNate Thursday, May 07, 2015 10:03:53 PMTwitter for Android
We made the cut @BadPointer Thursday, May 07, 2015 10:03:07 PMTwitter for Android
My twitter is outside of control............ JEEEEZ Thursday, May 07, 2015 7:21:29 AMTwitter for Android
Young Nate slaying pussy enjoyyyy Wednesday, May 06, 2015 11:11:59 PMTwitter for Android
Phone's got 4% battery so enjoy. Cya tomorrow. PS get it Nate. Wednesday, May 06, 2015 10:56:46 PMTwitter for Android
Edgar's all about the pussy Wednesday, May 06, 2015 10:46:06 PMTwitter for Android
DAT Snapchat doe Wednesday, May 06, 2015 10:27:34 PMTwitter for Android
Fuck. Wasted Wednesday, May 06, 2015 9:44:30 PMTwitter for Android
My girlfriend is Indian tomahawking the other team and I like it Wednesday, May 06, 2015 9:42:11 PMTwitter for Android
Sir. You need to put that out. You cannot smoke that joint at the bar Wednesday, May 06, 2015 9:37:51 PMTwitter for Android
And lungs Wednesday, May 06, 2015 9:31:10 PMTwitter for Android
I've been drinking since Thursday. Fuck my liver Wednesday, May 06, 2015 9:15:28 PMTwitter for Android
I'm gonna be drunk the rest of this weekend Wednesday, May 06, 2015 9:10:50 PMTwitter for Android
I am STOKED because I just confused two white people. Wednesday, May 06, 2015 8:19:46 PMTwitter for Android
This is going to be as bad a that time I kept talking about poinsettias Wednesday, May 06, 2015 12:49:27 PMTwitter for Android
Just like the Mayor of this cesspool, I too am also late because the @MTA hasn't sent an R train in 20 mins. Wednesday, May 06, 2015 12:21:39 PMTwitter for Android
I've had just about enough of New York City. Get me the fuck out of this cesspool. Tuesday, May 05, 2015 11:45:30 PMTwitter for Android
There's legit a rack mount server on the desk next to me and that's actually the password #forrealz http://t.co/99rXlVNO37 Tuesday, May 05, 2015 6:26:21 PMTwitter for Android
These joke shops finally realized they fucked up by splitting Foursquare and Swarm? https://t.co/o4d2tTLdRY Tuesday, May 05, 2015 2:58:50 AMTwitter for Android
Well done CJ Monday, May 04, 2015 9:54:45 PMTwitter for Android
Why do they call it real estate? Of course it's real. It's not fake estate. Monday, May 04, 2015 9:03:54 AMTwitter for Android
Please explain to me how I am 0% hung over right now... Actually I think I'm still drunk. Sunday, May 03, 2015 9:04:35 AMTwitter for Android
Sorry Boston, didn't mean to be mean to ya last night on Twitter. City's actually really cool. Sunday, May 03, 2015 8:58:26 AMTwitter for Android
@portfolioso I have absolutely no fucking idea what I meant by this tweet. Hahahha
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, May 03, 2015 8:52:51 AMTwitter for Android
At least Simmons could catch up to the fight. Amazon blows
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Sunday, May 03, 2015 3:13:28 AMTwitter for Android
@__JLu Hot dogs? nah. Sausage and peppers Sunday, May 03, 2015 2:17:24 AMTwitter for Android
We're all eating sausage and peppers blow me Sunday, May 03, 2015 2:08:57 AMTwitter for Android
I can't party anymore because this city is weak and NOT NEW FUCKIN YORK Sunday, May 03, 2015 2:03:49 AMTwitter for Android
I'm ready yo go 2 more hours cunts #Keith2015 Sunday, May 03, 2015 2:00:22 AMTwitter for Android
Pussy assed Boston shuts down at 2? NYC >BOS Sunday, May 03, 2015 1:59:23 AMTwitter for Android
Boston is pulling for Pacquiao Saturday, May 02, 2015 11:59:03 PMTwitter for Android
Trees for anyone who stops posting fuckin pusheens in the group chat #Keith2015 Saturday, May 02, 2015 11:53:47 PMTwitter for Android
Fireball after the 3rd round #Keith2015 Saturday, May 02, 2015 11:37:17 PMTwitter for Android
Lessahhhhd just got cut off #Keith2015 Saturday, May 02, 2015 11:36:19 PMTwitter for Android
Jacked @MalJNew's charger from her and it's clutch. #thanksmal Saturday, May 02, 2015 11:33:53 PMTwitter for Android
@TWC_Help you would fuck up the fight you fuckup waste of life company
In reply to @TWC_Help's tweet
Saturday, May 02, 2015 11:13:38 PMTwitter for Android
#Keith2015 #YouGodDamnBitch Saturday, May 02, 2015 11:12:46 PMTwitter for Android
"You gonna pusheen these fuckin balls?" #Keith2015 Saturday, May 02, 2015 10:09:40 PMTwitter for Android
Betances is dirty Saturday, May 02, 2015 4:04:40 PMTwitter for Android
We just got the hashtag of a bachlorette party and are gonna mess with them so badly on social media. Especially when drinking later. Saturday, May 02, 2015 2:04:17 PMTwitter for Android
There's a band playing pop hits of the 2000s and I'm mad obsessed Saturday, May 02, 2015 12:08:01 AMTwitter for Android
#freesimmons #Keith2015 Friday, May 01, 2015 10:39:49 PMTwitter for Android
@PaulONeillYES You are my hero!! We need more passion on the Yankees like you in the 90s
In reply to @PaulONeillYES's tweet
Friday, May 01, 2015 10:09:08 PMTwitter for Android
RT @PaulONeillYES: In Columbus, Ohio at Hall and Oates concert, but checking the score! Go bucks go Yanks!!! http://t.co/hWnAWzEYLu Friday, May 01, 2015 10:06:26 PMTwitter for Android
Wait a second. Did I just do a fireball? Don't remember bit it's not here #Keith2015 Friday, May 01, 2015 8:33:19 PMTwitter for Android
Jesus Christ, CC. You are awful Friday, May 01, 2015 8:25:52 PMTwitter for Android
"If someone gets arrested, we have grown up money to get out" #Keith2015 Friday, May 01, 2015 8:06:04 PMTwitter for Android
🎵Yours is the cloth mine is the hand that sews time🎵 Friday, May 01, 2015 7:10:08 PMTwitter for Android
The front desk people seem very concerned about our group #Keith2015 Friday, May 01, 2015 11:29:18 AMTwitter for Android
Should I be concerned? #Keith2015 http://t.co/akCA0BIvE1 Friday, May 01, 2015 10:34:36 AMTwitter for Android
Plenty of Lady Gaga this weekend #Keith2015 Friday, May 01, 2015 10:16:01 AMTwitter for Android
F- commute today on the 4/5 you fare raising pieces of shit @MTA Thursday, April 30, 2015 9:23:43 AMTwitter for Android
I'm a cray Thursday, April 30, 2015 12:41:50 AMTwitter for Android
Like, when I was a kid in the 90s obsessed with space, best pics of Pluto were like two dots. It was the only mystery planet. Now we'll know Thursday, April 30, 2015 12:39:41 AMTwitter for Android
Pluto is so fucking cool http://t.co/HNjgdSoSvd Thursday, April 30, 2015 12:38:21 AMTwitter for Android
Annnnnnnd I just got a YouTube copyright strike... Wednesday, April 29, 2015 11:13:38 PMTwitter for Android
🎵Peaches come from a can, they were put there by a man. In a factory downtown🎵 Wednesday, April 29, 2015 11:08:42 PMTwitter for Android
Oh Jesus Christ on the cross... I need to pack for Boston and I'm already tipsssss. #keith2015 Wednesday, April 29, 2015 11:05:12 PMTwitter for Android
Everyone's having sex tonight Wednesday, April 29, 2015 10:19:18 PMTwitter for Android
Drummer took his shirt off. Shits gotten real Wednesday, April 29, 2015 9:25:51 PMTwitter for Android
This bar's badass. I'm playing flip cup. Amatuer band is playing The Offspring. I'm on call for work drinking. Everything is awesome! Wednesday, April 29, 2015 9:19:32 PMTwitter for Android
Of course we lost at flip cup with these horseshit assed cups. http://t.co/dSmRtrE5SM Wednesday, April 29, 2015 9:08:42 PMTwitter for Android
RT @H9RBSjs: Developers Develop. Wednesday, April 29, 2015 1:52:50 PMTwitter for Android
I might actually die of alcohol poisoning this weekend #keith2015 Wednesday, April 29, 2015 11:54:28 AMTwitter for Android
@dpcleitao Actually, it's been misstyled for 2 years and no one fixed it. They forgot to include a stylesheet for the 404 page.
In reply to @dpcleitao's tweet
Tuesday, April 28, 2015 11:32:05 PMTwitter for Android
Just learned today that a product owner where I work knowingly suggested showing a 404 page on purpose in a certain situation. #MOron Tuesday, April 28, 2015 11:21:19 PMTwitter for Android
Inferior service cunts. The fuck do I pay you for? Keep raising the fare cunts @MTA Saturday, April 25, 2015 10:35:56 PMTwitter for Android
@MTA where the fuck is the train? You guys suck. Blow me. Saturday, April 25, 2015 10:34:23 PMTwitter for Android
Hanging out with these cool gentlemen from DEtroit Saturday, April 25, 2015 9:23:53 PMTwitter for Android
My grandpa calls Sabbatia Sebastion... And he sucks Saturday, April 25, 2015 7:46:15 PMTwitter for Android
This building looks like it has a fupa http://t.co/wQjJhPZDnu Saturday, April 25, 2015 7:21:48 PMTwitter for Android
Look like Mark "Vagina" Texiera hit a homer Saturday, April 25, 2015 6:05:18 PMTwitter for Android
Cuncel da CC Saturday, April 25, 2015 5:48:01 PMTwitter for Android
This bar is playing like early mid 2000s jams and it's not the 90s bit its still sick Saturday, April 25, 2015 5:26:01 PMTwitter for Android
Christ I've been drinking all day and can't spell on fuckin twitter. typo'd 3/3 tweets and deleted one because it was so embarrassing Saturday, April 25, 2015 5:22:03 PMTwitter for Android
But secretly we all like Nickelback bit not really Saturday, April 25, 2015 5:15:13 PMTwitter for Android
Bartender told me to suck it when I said to out the game on instead of Nickelback on the jukebox. Saturday, April 25, 2015 5:14:52 PMTwitter for Android
0-4 CC get the fuck out Saturday, April 25, 2015 5:08:53 PMTwitter for Android
CC is a mediocre pitcher Saturday, April 25, 2015 5:04:18 PMTwitter for Android
My setup until I head out of this joint http://t.co/BEoTnXPqHg Friday, April 24, 2015 7:26:47 PMTwitter for Android
"Just because something is slightly better than unacceptable, doesn't make it good" -@MalJNew Friday, April 24, 2015 9:29:33 AMTwitter for Android
Gf thinks it's acceptable to dip a breadstick into Pillsbury chocolate frosting. Bread stick ≠ pretzel... Savage move. Wednesday, April 22, 2015 1:02:20 AMTwitter for Android
I feel bad for the next group of tourists I'm behind that does the rolling sidewalk block. Tuesday, April 21, 2015 7:07:03 PMTwitter for Android
Guy. Ya won? Nahhhh. #degenerate http://t.co/IQA9d8CC65 Sunday, April 19, 2015 5:22:34 PMTwitter for Android
My boy CJ just walked in with the best Drake into ever. Thursday, April 16, 2015 10:42:43 PMTwitter for Android
Absolutely absurd how hot this train is right now. Not even exaggerating Thursday, April 16, 2015 8:35:48 AMTwitter for Android
Delayed at 125th st because they can't figure out how to close the doors on this fuckin antique piece of shit @MetroNorth train Monday, April 13, 2015 8:07:50 AMTwitter for Android
Blind Mellon right now ⚡⚡ Saturday, April 11, 2015 4:06:45 PMTwitter for Android
@JonFrat @BarstoolJJ Jesus Christ, JJ
In reply to @JonFrat's tweet
Thursday, April 09, 2015 8:52:23 PMTwitter for Android
Sorry my new shortstop dude, you just can't make that Jeter running jumping play. Not happenin' Thursday, April 09, 2015 8:44:09 PMTwitter for Android
RT @NYRangers: #NYR WIN!!!!!
Playoffs ✔️
Division ✔️
Conference ✔️
LEAGUE ✔️
#BlueShirtProud http://t.co/haVqFroZ3W
Tuesday, April 07, 2015 11:11:37 PMTwitter for Android
My new middle aged alcoholic friend is playing the best music at the bar Tuesday, April 07, 2015 10:42:36 PMTwitter for Android
Sitting on the 5 church train over here. Preacher be preachin Tuesday, April 07, 2015 8:55:18 AMTwitter for Android
Valid Question... Where are these from? Jasons of Jamesport NY, Rita's of Dix Hills, Lily's in Deer Park? Or China? http://t.co/FvShElMTJ5 Monday, April 06, 2015 7:46:31 PMTwitter for Android
Headley is a real winner at third today. Arod would have made all those plays. Duh. Monday, April 06, 2015 1:56:27 PMTwitter for Android
This is exactly how I predicted the Yankees would start 2015 Monday, April 06, 2015 1:54:16 PMTwitter for Android
@portfolioso first off, my phone must have autocorrected that because there's no way I use the wrong grammar.
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Saturday, April 04, 2015 7:39:51 PMTwitter for Android
The wine tour is over and the bus is screaming Ja Rule and it's my fault and I'm not sad about it. Saturday, April 04, 2015 3:59:48 PMTwitter for Android
Mom's love me. Come on. Saturday, April 04, 2015 1:06:54 PMTwitter for Android
Mother's love me. I spit mad milf game Saturday, April 04, 2015 12:55:41 PMTwitter for Android
We need some Ja Rule up in this bus Saturday, April 04, 2015 10:33:21 AMTwitter for Android
Already singing Sublime out loud. Saturday, April 04, 2015 9:39:06 AMTwitter for Android
It's 9am and I'm having a Four Loko. I need to reevaluate my life. Saturday, April 04, 2015 9:13:19 AMTwitter for Android
@BarstoolJJ Not supposed to eat meat tonight, but its ok to get shitfaced as fuck. #SeemsLegit
In reply to @BarstoolJJ's tweet
Friday, April 03, 2015 9:19:52 PMTwitter for Android
RT @BarstoolJJ: I just paid a dude on the internet $9 to pick up and deliver me White Castle. #GoodFriday Friday, April 03, 2015 9:18:43 PMTwitter for Android
Barcade is hot as fuck Friday, April 03, 2015 9:18:33 PMTwitter for Android
Watching Going Clear on HBO GO right now and all I can say is: L. Ron Hubbard's nasty assed vampire teeth Wednesday, April 01, 2015 9:03:33 PMTwitter for Android
Entire team ordered Indian to this conference room. Wonder how long it'll smell like Indian in there? Wednesday, April 01, 2015 1:37:04 PMTwitter for Android
What in the hell is this cray camera guy doing at the auto show? Seizure city, USA. #GDNY Wednesday, April 01, 2015 7:56:01 AMTwitter for Android
R train is slow as fuck right now Tuesday, March 31, 2015 7:10:27 PMTwitter for Android
Welp Saturday, March 28, 2015 5:45:30 PMTwitter for Android
The MTA is winning tonight. Said there was a sick passenger on the 4/5. Switch to 6. 4/5 leaves, 6 now has delays. What a day. Thursday, March 26, 2015 7:40:48 PMTwitter for Android
👌👈 Thursday, March 26, 2015 3:22:04 PMTwitter for Android
"I don't like warm proteins on my salad" -@MalJNew, talking about grilled chicken Thursday, March 26, 2015 2:53:03 PMTwitter for Android
Cigarettes are fucking vile and you've gotta have rocks in your head to enjoy them Thursday, March 26, 2015 2:14:23 PMTwitter for Android
Everything about today is annoying the fuck out of me Thursday, March 26, 2015 2:11:32 PMTwitter for Android
The police stopped and had reasonable suspicion. Then they left because I was innocent son Saturday, March 21, 2015 11:52:34 PMTwitter for Android
My coat hides all. #notsketch Saturday, March 21, 2015 11:38:47 PMTwitter for Android
Just escaped the Hoboken PoPo Saturday, March 21, 2015 11:38:27 PMTwitter for Android
This Hoboken bus I'm on is the whitest bus ever Saturday, March 21, 2015 8:45:22 PMTwitter for Android
"I think I just swiped right on Beyonce #tinder" -buddah Saturday, March 21, 2015 7:07:53 PMTwitter for Android
Wasted Saturday, March 21, 2015 4:59:51 PMTwitter for Android
Nick swisherrrrrr bring me a mimosa Saturday, March 21, 2015 4:23:14 PMTwitter for Android
"Brunch place imcat usually makes" Typed that earlier. No idea what I meant. It's the level I'm at now Saturday, March 21, 2015 3:50:51 PMTwitter for Android
Nick Swisher is serving me brunch. Or his doppelganger Saturday, March 21, 2015 3:32:58 PMTwitter for Android
So shiny Saturday, March 21, 2015 3:22:12 PMTwitter for Android
Buddha and Tommy's hair is fantastic. Hemp shampoo. Saturday, March 21, 2015 3:21:59 PMTwitter for Android
Rootin for my boy Ed Cooley. Go Friars! Friday, March 20, 2015 11:09:49 PMTwitter for Android
@JFeitelberg fix the RSS feed
In reply to @JFeitelberg's tweet
Tuesday, March 17, 2015 11:49:05 PMTwitter for Android
So did they ever hear from Putin yet? Tuesday, March 17, 2015 1:07:00 AMTwitter for Android
Budweiser 40s in Stella glasses... Taxes much better. #psychology Monday, March 16, 2015 11:33:59 PMTwitter for Android
I'm like a grandpa trying to use an Apple TV. Chromecast FTW Monday, March 16, 2015 9:54:03 PMTwitter for Android
Sandwich I just ate was rustic as fuck Monday, March 16, 2015 7:30:26 PMTwitter for Android
Totally normal to listen to TLC at 6am amirite? Sunday, March 15, 2015 5:58:46 AMTwitter for Android
Passed out with my contact in. Proud. Haven't done that since college ya fuckin drunks Sunday, March 15, 2015 5:28:38 AMTwitter for Android
RT @MalJNew "Any lady walking in the lobby will have to be like a faucet when they see that picture of me..."-@portfolioso Sunday, March 15, 2015 5:26:47 AMTwitter for Android
RT @JFeitelberg: Everyone cancelled their plans on me tonight!!! http://t.co/t73vRBKNFv Saturday, March 14, 2015 10:54:16 PMTwitter for Android
Drunk texting your gf's mom tho Saturday, March 14, 2015 9:24:11 PMTwitter for Android
"Ray Romano is my favorite rock and roll star" -finkins Saturday, March 14, 2015 1:24:42 PMTwitter for Android
@__JLu oh right. Those...
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
Saturday, March 14, 2015 7:49:16 AMTwitter for Android
Remember back in the day when peeps use to take peeps' flip phones and rename contacts to ridic things? No one does that anymore. Wonder why Saturday, March 14, 2015 6:12:36 AMTwitter for Android
Punk rock!!!
✌✌✌
Friday, March 13, 2015 8:09:47 PMTwitter for Android
Just got into a huge argument about birds reproductive systems. Friday, March 13, 2015 7:51:43 PMTwitter for Android
Christ. I need to go back to work after this? Friday, March 13, 2015 3:29:35 PMTwitter for Android
"I been out the game too long. If a girl's touching me we gon' fuck" - Edgar Friday, March 13, 2015 3:15:34 PMTwitter for Android
They don't pay me enough for the years this place took off my life from lack of sleep, stress and false fuckin alarms Friday, March 13, 2015 2:16:11 AMTwitter for Android
I'm about to unfollow all the fitness freaks on Instagram/Facebook. Good for you, but I don't care about 9k posts about your workouts Thursday, March 12, 2015 6:53:18 PMTwitter for Android
Sir. It's completely necessary to be blasting shitty rap through your shitty phone speaker on the subway. Well dressed guy, too. Wednesday, March 11, 2015 10:09:50 PMTwitter for Android
@ky9 don't need em. Extra crap to shovel
In reply to @ky9's tweet
Tuesday, March 10, 2015 6:58:25 PMTwitter for Android
@ky9 depends. Some streets, but not mine.
In reply to @ky9's tweet
Tuesday, March 10, 2015 6:45:15 PMTwitter for Android
@__JLu hardware wise, nothing beats it and even older Macs outperform and out-style anything PC... Unless you build your own desktop
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Tuesday, March 10, 2015 12:18:46 AMTwitter for Android
@__JLu although I'm not into Mac OS, I get design. They're top notch pieces of hardware and the current model will serve you very well.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
Tuesday, March 10, 2015 12:16:44 AMTwitter for Android
12k +14.4k people are fuckin hipster asshole Apple fanboy ignorants. If Apple released shit in a box, it'd sell out http://t.co/b2sCurW1R1 Monday, March 09, 2015 11:25:33 PMTwitter for Android
@__JLu although any apple products were better than those two pieces of shit and I am not even a huge apple fan. Just realistic about tech
In reply to @portfolioso's tweet
Monday, March 09, 2015 11:18:40 PMTwitter for Android
@__JLu reminds me of how I tried to justify how the Nexus 4 wasn't better than the Galaxy Nexus. It was. I was butthurt for newer specs.
In reply to @__JLu's tweet
Monday, March 09, 2015 11:17:44 PMTwitter for Android
I hate the Irish American, but they're playing 90s rock so I can give them a pass for the night Monday, March 09, 2015 9:49:34 PMTwitter for Android
@Docent_Steve oh shit. I favorited this without looking at the picture first. Come onnnnn. Boylan's is delicious though.
In reply to @Docent_Steve's tweet
Monday, March 09, 2015 9:04:33 PMTwitter for Android
I wanna toss on a Steely Dan record right now Sunday, March 08, 2015 9:37:22 PMTwitter for Android
Omg 90s rock cover band Friday, March 06, 2015 10:33:10 PMTwitter for Android
@tomwcleary Christ they suck
In reply to @tomwcleary's tweet
Thursday, March 05, 2015 9:08:26 PMTwitter for Android
I guess it's true love when your gf just pulls your glasses from your face when she needs to see something far Thursday, March 05, 2015 7:34:59 PMTwitter for Android
"Joe. Do you really want me to tell her 'It's already rolled it to prod so blow me'?"

Yes. Yes I do. Blow me
Thursday, March 05, 2015 4:24:44 PMTwitter for Android
Lol. Arod is at bat Wednesday, March 04, 2015 2:43:19 PMTwitter for Android
Now he's throwing shit onto the tracks Monday, March 02, 2015 8:36:25 PMTwitter for Android
A gentleman is folding and repacking all his clothes into a duffle bag, taking up an entire bench. This AM, we had a newspaper collector. Monday, March 02, 2015 8:34:50 PMTwitter for Android
Buncha winners on the subway recently... And by winners I mean the most crazy and homeless Monday, March 02, 2015 8:33:16 PMTwitter for Android
Look at all the fucks I don't give! Monday, March 02, 2015 11:36:04 AMTwitter for Android
This is why @foursquare has gone downhill. Suggesting the Disney when you do searches for smut... Lawls http://t.co/NI6QkDUJjz Saturday, February 28, 2015 7:36:11 PMTwitter for Android
My cab driver's license expired in 2011. This is where I'm at right now Saturday, February 28, 2015 12:15:29 AMTwitter for Android
Errrybody in the club getting tipssssssssss Friday, February 27, 2015 11:53:34 PMTwitter for Android
The GF just twerked it on top of a skeeball machine at Brother Jimmy's. Not sure what to say about that. Friday, February 27, 2015 11:47:13 PMTwitter for Android
Freddy's tryin to bang a 48 yr old scrum master. #getitin Friday, February 27, 2015 11:18:03 PMTwitter for Android
@TWC_Help rebooted the modem many times. If it's a signal issue, need a tech to check the lines. Will schedule next week
In reply to @TWC_Help's tweet
Friday, February 27, 2015 10:10:10 PMTwitter for Android
@TWC_Help got a letter that my 1 year promo is up and its going up $10/month. Convince me why I should stay if there's been outages daily Friday, February 27, 2015 9:47:28 PMTwitter for Android
Who's the dick who put mint leaves in my beer? Friday, February 27, 2015 8:56:44 PMTwitter for Android

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