Portfolioso's Twitter Bullshit

DLK is a badass: "Those guys need to a we're not fucking dumbasses asterisk next to our account"

How the fuck did my pants get wet? I didn't just piss myself, did I?

They need to finish this fuckin Popham Road bridge. Fuckin drilling, banging and machines all night, and I'm a half a mile away!

Siri, can you get me a Galaxy Nexus?

Bitch finally took my advice. I win! When I propose something at work, it will go my way, and it will be good. #futurestevejobs #winning

I swear to God, if this cunt coughs in my face one more fucking time...

After working in nano all day and moving to notepad++, I tried to save a file with Ctrl-O. Got confused when the open dialog came up. #fail

OMG. html5 Duck Hunt!!! http://t.co/HBweLwp

I want to punch Michelle in the face right now, on the grounds that her web design is fucking flawed, confusing and I'm right

@Waspito Funny how I left school and my alcoholism stopped (kind of). Living at home reminds me of the show Sober House with Dr. Drew.

In reply to @Waspito's tweet

@Waspito Fuck that shit. Have a beer or 6

In reply to @Waspito's tweet

So amazing when I was ripping on one of our new products and didn't realize the VP of Marketing was standing behind me. #winning

Also for fucks sake, don't stop to read a motherless map at the base of a staircase, oblivious bastards... People need to get by.

everyone is walking like they have cocks rammed up their asses in grand central. get the fuck out of my way

It kills me so hard that I can't tweet what I want anymore and have to keep this toned down.